The grass is always greener is an adage that "Deadpan Valentine" lives by, pure and simple. How often does another life look so cozy to us, yet we're never sure how cozy it can be until we walk in another person's shoes. "Deadpan Valentine" is told through two compelling and funny narratives, both on opposite spectrums. Scott is a good
looking guy who wakes up next to a beautiful girl. He's self-centered, and immensely vain and goes off to acting class to be shown humility by the mere fact that he's a shitty actor, while his flat mate Jamie (the more interesting sub-plot) is a reclusive man who hides in his room all the time, and finally emerges to commit suicide. He fails once, and is interrupted
the second time by his doorbell... where an armed gunman waits to take him hostage. Oy.

The paradox being that Jamie, who doesn't care about dying, inadvertently finds himself near death from a man who really isn't intent on killing him. Can you find your value in life by staring death in the face by a man whose also lost value in life? The press kit for this
includes the tagline "anti rom-com", and it's accurate to what the plot entails. This is truly an anti-romance in every form. Our of the two plots, one is about a broken man being held hostage by another broken man on Valentine's, while his friend is off spending the holiday in an acting class, hamming it up. Which by the way is featured in some rather hilarious
scenes where the vain Scott (the very funny Jonathan Rhodes), who considers himself a successor to Brando, completely chews the scenery on a simple restaurant scene. Rhodes' comic timing is sharp, and he's just hysterical.

Eli Silverman, as the inept captor Bruce, is very funny in his performance storming in to the flat without a single clue as to how he'd resolve the situation in front of him. His intent is to take Scott hostage for sleeping with his girlfriend, but gets angry when he discovers only Jamie. In one particularly clever sequence, Bruce imagines the stand off he suspects will take place soon, in spite of the fact that Jamie swears he won't call anyone. "Deadpan Valentine" is just filled with pure talent, from the very good performances to director Robert Lindsey's tight direction. He alternates flawlessly between dramatic situation to comedic situation without ever really losing a step. Jamie and Scott's situations are awfully different, and it's hardly noticeable as he switches back and forth. The ultimate moral though of "Deadpan" is that someone else's situation is always a lot worse than yours, and the anti-romance will really make for pleasing entertainment for those who just despise valentine's day.

With great direction, great writing, and surprisingly tight acting, "Deadpan Valentine" is an entertaining dramedy about misery during the dumbest holiday of the year. It's the perfect film for anyone seeking to destroy the celebrated day, and I had a lot of fun.

• For information on "Deadpan Valentine", check out the official website: http://www.deadpanvalentine.com/

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