We’re shivering
under self-imposed ‘heatless Tuesdays’ here, trying to save a
little dough so baby can get a new pair of shoes. Bad thing to
do in the dead of winter, (scrimp on heat, that is – new shoes
are good to have when your feet are cold) but I know it means
that Summer is right around the horizon and with it comes the
Summer Movie season – starting March 3rd this year. I’m waxing
my board ready to surf a sea of sequels and remakes, again. Not
really, I’m just getting around to watching last year’s sequels
on DVD, such as: Spiderman 3 and Evan Almighty!
I love Sam Raimi. Evil Dead and its sequels are among my
favorite movies, and for a variety of reasons. Darkman is OK,
but by the time A Simple Plan rolls around, it’s obvious Raimi’s
the real deal. How happy I was to learn Raimi had snagged
Spiderman, and when the box office receipts started tallying I
felt great pride.
Pity I’ve not really liked any of the Spiderman movies, but when
rakings equal GNPs, they’re gonna keep on coming, which leads us
to Spiderman 3, the worst, and best, of the bunch. Boy, when
you’re spending over a quarter-billion dollars to make a movie,
you’re gonna end up throwing everything in. For part 3, Spidey
amps up a weird pas de deux with his frenemy Green Goblin
junior, and then Thomas (Sideways) Hayden Church turns into a
super-thug-of-sand, and then Peter Parker wants to marry Mary
Jane but her heart is torn, and then an alien glob takes over
Spidey/Peter Parker, and then Topher Grace shows up and then and
then …
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… and then we’re
exhausted by the overlong running-time, silly
melodrama and ultimately numbed by the fact that 90%
of the movie is CGI. On the other hand, that CGI is
just getting better and better (I was stunned by the
fake-itude of the first movie’s effects) and the
action sequences, largely, are exhilarating.
I guess I (unlike the
fan-boys) don’t hold Spiderman too dearly, because
Parker’s transformation into a disco-loving Russian
Mobster circa 1992 (complete with numerous,
hilarious dance sequences) strikes me as possibly
the best part of the movie. Utterly derailing in its
intensity of self-deprecating humor, this homage to
Saturday Night Fever reasserts the fact that
Spiderman is a comic book (sure, an old-school
neo-realist one) and that these movies shouldn’t be
taken too seriously. To prove that point again out
trots Topher Grace, the cosmic understudy for Tobey
Maguire, for a face-off that has yet another sequel
in its DNA – Marvel Team-Up: Tobey and Topher take
on the High-school Jocks. Put upon nerds everywhere
are holding their breath. |
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So should we, as
Nation, as a Culture, allow folks to spend serious money – like,
start teaching Physical Education again, or insure the poor, or
cure a disease-type-money – on triflin’ entertainment such as a
Sequel to an Awful Jim Carrey Comedy? When it’s starring Steve
Carell, why not? But for reals, Evan Almighty, as stupid, lowest
common denominator and Bible belt pleasing as it is, is a damn
sight better, funnier and possibly even more meaningful than
it’s forebear Bruce Almighty. And you can really see the money
on the screen.
Tons of animal and deluge CGI aside, they built an actual,
life-size ark for the movie, and damned if you don’t completely
buy into the enormity of (and by default the central conceit of
the film) the concept. I bet it’s the single biggest line item
in the budget. And not only does it work, but Carell works too.
He’s the only actor who could pull it off, he’s got a much
subtler than Carrey knack for physical comedy, eyes that sell
whatever ridiculous thing he’s doing, and he creates the
illusion that he’s totally without ego – even if he’s playing a
pompous self-centered dolt (ala The Office).
Anyway, Carell plays a newly elected Senator (somewhat doltish)
with a hot wife and three sons. Just as he’s (quickly) warming
to the idea of being wealthy and powerful, Morgan Freeman as God
shows up to spoil the party. There’s another ark to build,
possibly because of an impending flood. Cubits and cubits of
lumber arrive and the requisite pairs of animals. Meanwhile,
Carell tries to hold it all together while rapidly growing a
thick white beard and sporting ancient robes. The humor derived
from these situations is often mild, sometimes pandering and
boneheaded, but is always elevated by Carell’s intensity. His
resigned but secretly-getting-into-it attitude as he transforms
into a biblical character makes for some fresh, amusing comedy.
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Evan Almighty may have
been a miserable failure at the box office (compared
to its massive outlay) but most critics lambasted it
unfairly. Yes, as a sequel it is unnecessary, but as
a stand-alone vehicle it’s not bad – expensive, yes,
pandering, yes, a few animals short of a full
ark-load, yes – but what do you want, chum? Steve
Carell runs circles around Jim Carrey in the comedy
and likeability department, and can you imagine
anyone else in the world playing God at this point,
besides Morgan Freeman? And for those determined to
leave the theater (and now the couch) with a grumpy
little frown, the credits sequence comes with an
hilarious cast and crew dance montage that would
make even a dead person smile. |
Maybe these big
budget ‘flops’ - that didn’t triple their already astronomical
budgets with box-office receipts – will signal an end to sequel
mania, but I frickin’ doubt it. The best a responsible movie fan
can do is ignore them until they wind up on disc, where the
laughs and the scoffing can be had on the cheap. It’s a lot
easier to enjoy Maguire’s evil strut in the comfort of your own
home, know what I’m saying?
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