Rated: PG for mild sexual content, and mild language.
Genre: Kids/Family Comedy Adventure
Directed By: Adam Shankman
Running Time: 1:34
Review by: Felix Vasquez Jr.
Review Date: 1/16/07
Special Features:
Commentary by: Director Adam Shankman
Theatrical Trailer
"Camp Chaos" Featurette
"A Comedic Trio" Featurette


If there was ever an argument for abortion, “Cheaper by the Dozen 2” should be a pretty strong one. In the age of over fed, spoiled rotten, all consuming, all devouring, fat modern America, it’s amazing that there are still different Conservative entities that promote having lots of and lots of children as noble and quirky. Gone are the financial troubles, individual problems, and stress of taking care of many young children, no, Disney says, having a dozen kids is wonderful, not hard. Having twelve mouths to feed in a starving country is funny and sweet, and utterly influenced.

Unless you’re the Hitler Youth, a cult, starting a sports team, or Mormon, I don’t see why having twelve kids could be such a great idea, even to people financially prepared to have them. But that’s not the crime behind “Cheaper by the Dozen 2,” its crime is that it’s a sequel of a barely watchable remake. It’s almost as if all studios have Eugene Levy on their rolodexes, and when they’re in need of a quick sequel character, they just turn to him.


This man will say yes to any role it seems, he and Sam Jackson are in good company. But that’s only a piece of this maggot pie. There’s the typically awful performance by Hilary Duff who is forced into center stage, Tom Welling once again staggering around in his usual stilted performance, engaging in a cheesy “Romeo & Juliet” plot with Jamie King, and the typically predictable center plot of a rival family with as much kids as these bozos competing for no other reason than the writers were out of ideas.

Not to mention, the typical adolescents battling well meaning but inept parents malarkey we’ve seen time and time again. And then, rather than focus on the children, director Shankman centers the film entirely around physical outtakes from nearly the entire cast, and the usual glib one-liners from Bonnie Hunt which have now become a fail safe. She can deliver one-liners, but the one-liners have to actually be funny to enjoy the actress. Beyond these evident errors, “Cheaper by the Dozen 2” is an obvious cash in with Steve Martin slumming yet again. There’s really nothing I can say about “Cheaper by the Dozen 2” that any normal person can’t see already.

I think it should be considered child abuse to inflict this tripe upon children, because I don’t see what can be learned or gained by showing them a film that influences pro-creating like it’s going out of style. “Cheaper by the Dozen 2” is an abomination with some of the worst performances, and a truly terrible plot. Martin’s career: RIP.



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