It’s like Lost in comic book form. It’s like crack. It’s a spy book that has you hooked from page one, and has all kinds of characters that just fill the page with awesomeness. Nick Fury you’ve got, we all know how awesome he is.

You’ve got the great-grandson of the original Ghost Rider, Carter Slade, you’ve got a character related to Secret War (the Bendis version), and you’ve got characters related to all kinds of Marvel heroes and villains.

And you’ve got the goddamn Howling Commandoes. And good lord almighty, you’ve got some ass-kicking going on in this book. HAMMER gets taken down a peg or a thousand, and Hydra finally gets their asses handed to them too. All good things.

Hickman is the next big thing at Marvel. Easy enough.

The greatest book this week is Unknown Soldier 10. It really doesn’t matter which issue it is. It doesn’t.

The book is stellar. Unrelenting. Comic book perfection. One of the best things on the market and one of the easiest and most rewarding reads every single month.

I’m very happy to say that I’ve spoken, albeit briefly and online only, with Josh Dysart, the writer of this fabulous book, and I have to say, every single issue puts you in the spot of the unforgiving Unknown Soldier. He doesn’t ask you to be sad for Moses, to cry for him.

He just tells the story. Like any good writer would.

I am very excited that this book is continuing on. Every month I worry that I will not be able to read it, but I hope that cooler heads will prevail and the book will sell. Because it deserves to sell. It deserves to be the cream of the crop in the comic book market.

It is the only Vertigo book I buy monthly, sadly (I wish I was monthly on Air, Scalped, Northlanders, and quite a few others), but I will never be upset that I have all 10 issues and will have every issue that follows.

For as long as it runs, I will be there.

And now, a very unfortunate thing has to happen. It shouldn’t have happened. It didn’t need to happen. It had no reason to happen. But thank all that is holy that this is it. This is over.

I am done reading Ultimate Marvel Comics. Because there is nothing worthwhile for me any longer in this universe.

Jeph Loeb has taken something exciting, something amazing, something like a nice cool breeze, and turned it into a rotten steaming pile of shit that makes you cringe and taste that ugly taste in your mouth.

It’s disgusting.

It’s rotten.

It’s downright despicable.

Ultimatum 5 is the worst comic, quite easily this week, and quite possibly this year. I will spoil it for you here. So if you don’t want to know what happens in this book, walk away now.

I warned you.

Magneto dies. Cyclops dies. Wolverine dies.

And they don’t just die. They are brutally murdered. Basically, if you’ve ever loved any of these characters growing up, they are brutally massacred before your eyes like they should mean nothing to you. Turned into disgusting hunks of flesh and bone or just turned into nothing.

Ultimatum slaps you in the face, spits in your open and gaping mouth, and laughs at you for spending your money on this drivel. There is no tact involved in this comic. It’s like taking Michael Bay and telling him to direct a Will Eisner graphic novel. And it would be filled with boobs and explosion and giant robots.

There is NO reason for this comic. There is NO reason that this had to happen.

Perfect example, and the entirety of the comic is filled with it, but Magneto is told by Nick Fury all about how mutants were man-made (as we saw in Ultimate Origins) all in the span of half of a page. There is no tact. The man has just killed nearly every single major character in the Ultimate universe, and he is off his rocker and killed his one time best friend, and boom, instead of using tact, you throw this MAJOR wrench in his face and expect him to accept it?

And he does? He just sits there and takes it?

Shouldn’t this guy who just wiped out a major portion of the world be a little bit PISSED that his entire life has been a lie? Shouldn’t that maybe have been the reason that we were lead to this whole thing? Not the death of his idiot kids, who we find out aren’t even dead?

Just forget it.

It’s like flogging a dead Doctor Strange. There’s no reason for it. There is no reason for any of this.

So instead of spending my weekend saying a requiem for Ultimate Wolverine, I will instead think back on all the great Ultimate Comics that came out, like the good X-men arcs, the great Ultimate Spider-man book, and the good Fantastic Four and Ultimates arcs.

I don’t think I will ever buy another Ultimate comic again, and unless he writes something that I have to read, I will never buy another comic Jeph Loeb’s name is attached to.

Ever.

Again.

Goodbye Ultimate Marvel comics. I will miss you.