Dario Argento's conclusion to the epic trilogy started with Suspiria and Inferno is a supreme disappointment and embarrassment. The movie that Argento fans were waiting years to see limps across the screen as a continuing downward trend in the previously uneven but visually arresting director's career. This movie doesn't even remotely feel like the third part in a trilogy, let alone a coherent exercise in filmmaking. Asia Argento stars as a hapless woman pursued by minions of the Mother of Tears, the supposed most powerful and evil witch in Argento's mythology, even though she spends most of the movie's running time naked and laughing.

Once a casket containing the Third Mother's ratty tunic of power is accidentally opened, her power across the country grows as her devoted followers commit random acts of violence which basically consists of badly dressed Goth people yelling and laughing at passers by. Truly chilling. It is a cliche'd crutch to have the witches portrayed as stereotypical Euro trash Goths, when most are dressed in black, have badly teased hair and an over abundance of make up. It would have been more chilling if we were presented with society's decay by having average, ordinary people fall under the influence of the Mother of Tears. Instead these badly presented rejects look like they are in their 30's and still collect toys or moderate horror message boards. Argento's previous opuses had brilliantly staged murder set pieces, show stopping visual assaults on the viewer's senses that left you flabbergasted and awed.

This movie actually feels a step backward in Argento's career, talent wise. Missing are the Argento visuals that made him a fan favorite, and Claudio Simonetti's barely audible soundtrack is a far cry from his cult followed reputation when he was in Goblin. Argento has never been a master script writer and his plots were usually the weakest aspect of his films, but The Mother of Tears takes a shoddy script to a new level. Filled with plot holes, sequences that go nowhere, horrible lapses of judgment and disbelief this movie plods along barely connected from one bad set piece to set piece. Co-written by so-called "hardcore horror fans" Jace Anderson and Adam Gierasch, this movie is proof that horror fans such as these two and others like Rob Zombie or Eli Roth should not be allowed to help make a movie, since the worst cinematic tripe seems to come from their consciousnesses.

This is the Dario Argento who feels that shocking audiences is the same as scaring audiences. One of my many gripes about this movie is the absolute horrible attitude and portrayal of violence toward children. From babies being tossed off bridges to the cannibalism of children, this is not disturbing imagery but completely distasteful. As a parent myself, and not only a horror fan but an Argento fan, I couldn't help but be let down by such images. The scenes of carnage directed toward children are as unnecessary and useless as the scenes of animal cruelty in 80's Italian Mondo movies. It's being shocking for shocking's sake since these scenes do not further the narrative in the slightest. In recent interviews Argento has been raving about his fairly new fascination of depraved sex. He's boasted that this movie will have scenes of amazing sexual atrocities that will tantalize viewers. If the laughable scene of someone eating a length of rope out of someone's rear end is your idea of a good time then this movie will be a treat for you. It's the lame scenes like the one described that show just how truly pedestrian and awkward this whole production is. I almost wish they decided to film the truly ludicrous scene in the script where a human hand erupted out of someone's rectum clutching an animal. Believe me when I say I don't have the time or the patience to make that up.

I’m convinced that anyone who feels that this is a worthy conclusion to Argento’s trilogy, let alone a redeemable film in any way has either fallen off their bicycle without a helmet or are completely lying and trying to impress someone. Argento fans have been hoping for a film to reaffirm that the director is still capable of impressing and horrifying us. Unfortunately I believe that we are all still waiting for such a film, because this isn’t it.

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