D.E.B.S. (2004)

DEBSI wasn’t expecting a masterpiece with “DEBS”, and when I was done, I received just what I was expecting. I’ve seen material that have spoofed the spy genre with women from “Charlie’s Angels” and “She-Spies”, and “DEBS” doesn’t stand out among the others. In spite of its homosexual twist, it’s still the same old trash we’re exposed to that attempts to be clever and tongue-in-cheek, when really it’s basically just tired and yawn-inducing.

Now, I’ve seen the original short film, and as far as that went, it was low in brains and entertainment value, but it was interesting. For a short film. Now when you take that and expand it in to a really pointless and mind numbing ninety minutes, those admirable brainless qualities, just become a lame, vain attempt to cash in. There’s really nothing given to us here that we haven’t already seen created a dozen times on film and television. Now if you want a good spoof of female spy flicks, watch the short-lived television series “She-Spies”.

Usually, watching hot girls with guns in schoolgirl outfits, a few of whom happen to be lesbian. would really make me giddy, but oddly enough, I wasn’t. “DEBS” surpasses all sexual appeal because it’s brainless, and incredibly unfunny. There’s not a single gag here that sparked a chuckle or a smile from me, and though I wanted to enjoy the scenery, I couldn’t get over the rotting stench in the air. “DEBS” also consists of pretty bad acting from Foster and Brewster, an odd walk-on role from Michael Clarke Duncan, vapid characters, Aoki doing a horrible French accent, and really crappy choreography that surpassed laughable and delved in to painful.

“DEBS” is schlock, and not the good kind, it’s the painful, stupid, and horribly uncomfortable schlock that will garner it a surefire spot on the ninety-nine cent bin at your local video store. I’ll surely be shocked if “DEBS” has a shelf life of two years. In spite of the glowing presences of Aoki and Brewster, “DEBS” is a really cheesy, and stale effort in spy comedy that’s been done a million times and never really amounts to anything comedic or entertaining.