Voodoo Moon (2005)

voodoomoonbigOutside of Buffy geeks, I really don’t see what reason you could have for liking “Voodoo Moon”. It’s a limp semi-action fantasy that uses the device of Voodoo as an excuse to expose its superhero, said hero is in the form of Eric Mabius who looks like quasi-Brandon Lee circa 1994. He’s dressed like a Goth, but really is a Voodoo shaman who is forced to fight off an evil entity that killed his mom and dad when he was a child. He enlists the help of his sister, played by Charisma Carpenter, who has a penchant for drawing pictures that foretell the future. And that’s really all she’s good for.

That and causing orgasms to Buffy fans. The film is so sloppy that in one scene, a toddler goes into a bathroom where his mother is bathing and proceeds to carry an electrical device to electrocute her and you can actually see the child look back at his mom who is signaling him off-screen. But beyond that, this is an obvious vain grasp for a STV franchise, or perhaps a series, that will likely get a deal in Bizarro world. And for no real reasons we’re introduced to many, many characters all of whom are set-up to die at the hands of the mysterious force that Voodoo Man must confront sooner or later. For a film attempting to come off as stylish and hip, it’s really boring. The plot drags on and on with cheesy special effects, and characters recollecting upon scenarios I could give a crap about.

“Voodoo Moon” is not just crappy, it’s rambling. It rambles on and on about nothing with endless dialogue about how Cole, our goth hero, is so powerful, but not powerful enough, and how his sister can draw things that tell the future, we get it! We get it already! How about some plot motion? The entire film comes off as a bad imitation of a bad episode of “Charmed” and that’s embarrassing. Mabius is probably the most obvious of drawn up superheroes with a scar over his eyes, long black hair, and a black leather outfit while he lies around most of the time whining about his situation.

Mabius comes off as a poor man’s Mark Wahlberg, which is sad because he’s a poor man’s Donny Wahlberg. Carpenter on the other hand doesn’t do much. She stands around and tries to pick up the slack, but fails in that too. Because the movie is boring and underwhelming, basically what I expected. I’d like to pretend these movies are good, but they’re really not. Outside of easy to please “Buffy” fans, I don’t see how “Voodoo Moon” can even be remotely entertaining when it’s just a weak grasp for a franchise with a lame superhero, his lamer sidekick, and a terrible story.

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