Ranking the TMNT movies from Best to Worst

Despite being mainly associated with the 1980’s, Eastman and Laird’s “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” is the franchise that has yet to suffer a death of obscurity. It is instead rebooted and revamped every decade for a new generation and they still hold some massive appeal. This week the Turtles make their cinematic comeback with “Mutant Mayhem,” an animated reboot from produces Evan Goldberg and Seth Rogen. In celebration I thought it’d be fun to rank all of the cinematic outings of the Heroes in a half shell from Best to Worst.

What are your rankings?

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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem (2023)

What we’re seeing with “Mutant Mayhem” is what happens after every movie makes a bang at the box office. The “The Spider-Verse” movies were so beloved and influential that we can expect studios to ape its animation and storytelling style for at least a few years. The first of what will probably be many to come is “Mutant Mayhem.” Jeff Rowe’s animated movie is a new re-imagining of Eastman and Laird’s “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” franchise, but aimed a lot more toward Generation Z. That’s both a quality that improves what producers Seth Rogen and Evan Goldbergh aim to be the beginning of a new wave of popularity for the Turtles, and a hindrance. 

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Batman vs. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2019)

Every once in a while, I’m glad to break out of the doom and gloom of DC Batman movies and watch something that is just fun and exciting. I admit that I missed all the waves of comic books in the last few years where Batman crossed paths with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, so this movie was completely new to me. Suffice to say being a fan of both properties I was anxious to see how they would handle it, and thankfully DC/Warner and Nickelodeon delivers something for the fans and the general audience looking for a good pop culture crossover.

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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze (1991)

TMNT-III know that this is grounds for getting my “90’s Kid” membership card stripped from my hands, but the more I see “TMNT II,” the more I dislike it. Yes, it has camp value thanks to Vanilla Ice, but nostalgia lens aside, it’s a pretty crummy follow up to the 1990 movie. It’s basically the “Batman Forever” of the original TMNT movie series, a movie that waters down the formula of the Ninja Turtles. Hell, even like “Batman Forever,” the turtles are no longer urban legends working in the shadows, and become virtual celebrities by the climax. Much to the shock of everyone involved, 1990’s “TMNT” movie was a film for all ages that took violence seriously, and depicted actual consequences to actions and decisions.

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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows (2016)

TMNToutoftheshadowsWhile 2014’s “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” was a watered down remake of the 1990 Jim Henson production, “Out of the Shadows” is a larger and sillier remake of “Secret of the Ooze” taking a lot of the ideas from the aforementioned film and realizing them to a more “TMNT” accurate vision. “Secret of the Ooze” had all the implications of the Krang, Baxter Stockman and the like, but “Out of the Shadows” takes that and re-introduces it to make about as much sense as it can. Rather than Tokka and Rahzar, we finally have Bebop and Rocksteady in their full disgusting glory, battling the Ninja Turtles, and playing stooges to the Shredder. “Out of the Shadows” isn’t a masterpiece by any means, but it’s ten times better than its 2014 predecessor.

That might be because it comes up with a radical new idea and focuses the majority of the sequel on the titular Ninja Turtles. April O’Neil is still a major character but is pushed to the sidelines more and more, allowing the characters we came to see a bigger spotlight and more of a chance to grow and blossom. The Platinum Dumbs version of the turtles is still wildly imperfect and stupid, but “Out of the Shadows” is at least fun, and tries to give us as many elements from the canon as possible. After Shredder’s plans from the first film are thwarted, he’s taken to jail and sent to a maximum security prison, supervised by Officer Casey Jones. When Shredder is broken free by his foot clan, he brings along thugs Bebop and Rocksteady to set off a plan to take over the world alongside a new alien ally.

Armed with mad scientist Baxter Stockman, Shredder plans to build a mutant army, and use his alien allies to help him rule. When the Turtles, with the help of April, learn of the mutagen, they learn the ooze has potential to turn them in to humans. With the turtles still pariahs of the city, Raphael is tempted to become human, while Leonardo tries to convince them to stay true to themselves. This time around there’s a larger focus on the dynamics of the brothers, as Leo and Raph bicker and fight for command over this current development, while Michelangelo is no longer making erection jokes, and is now the party dude we know and love, making cracks, fawning over pizza, and approaching every challenge with a chuckle worthy of Spiccoli. Stephen Amell is also a fun addition to the cast, providing a charismatic take on Casey Jones.

“Out of the Shadows” is a really good time and about as close to great as can be expected from something starring Megan Fox. I wish she’d drop out and allow an actress with actual ability and chemistry with her co-stars to take the reins as April. “Out of the Shadows” also has no idea how to handle so many elements of the narrative as there’s so much going on for a hundred minute movie. A lot of conflicts are tacked on, sub-plots go nowhere, and Splinter being retconned to have no connection to Shredder makes him a virtually pointless addition to the team. He literally does nothing but meditates in the background and offer convenient pearls of wisdom to his sons, with no actual emotional investment in their battle. You could have cut Splinter out of this movie, and it would have had no effect on the overall production.

Meanwhile there is the gaping wide hole of the new mutagen presented from Dimension X and the Krang. If the mutagen turns Bebop and Rocksteady from humans to animals, why can the mutagen possibly turn the turtles in to humans? They weren’t humans before they became teenage turtles. The implication of being mutants is that they’re anthropomorphic and human like, so wouldn’t they revert back to normal everyday turtles if given the mutagen? Also, I’m not a science wiz, but since when do the turtles have human DNA in them? Wouldn’t becoming human being a mutation be very redundant to the narrative? That said, if you can forgive the canyon wide plot hole, “Out of the Shadows” is an entertaining diversion that improves on a lot of the glaring flaws from the 2014 reboot.

Top Five Favorite Moments in 1990’s “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles”

TMNT1990In 1990, just two days after TMNT 1990 premiered in theaters, my dad took my brother and me to see it in theaters in Manhattan one afternoon. It was just the three of us in what felt like a humongous theater, draped in the dark as the Turtles my brother and I worshipped finally jumped on to the screen after saving April O’Neil from being killed by the Foot Clan.

While I don’t particularly love the current cinematic incarnations of the TMNT, I hope there are kids out there getting the same awe inducing experience with “TMNT: Out of the Shadows” as I did when I was seven. “TMNT ‘90” still holds up very well today, with some excellent action set pieces, great humor, and so many quotable moments. Here are only five of my favorite moments in a movie filled with some banner scenes.

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My Top Five Favorite TMNT Rip-Offs

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In case you didn’t know and were a bad bad fan boy, Saturday March 19th was Ninja Turtles day. To celebrate the four heroes in a half shell, I compiled a list of my five favorite TMNT wannabes. Remember in the mid to late eighties when every studio wanted their own Transformers, GI Joe, and TMNT series to collect the sweet sweet dollarydoos from kids? Then suddenly the mid-nineties came and everyone wanted their own Power Rangers? Well, once the nineties popped around every studio or company had heroes that were either created by mysterious ooze or were anthropomorphic talking animals with attitude.

Here are five of the best in a decade filled with some pretty awful ones, altogether.

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