{"id":1060,"date":"2010-03-20T05:07:13","date_gmt":"2010-03-20T09:07:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cinemacrazed.wordpress.com\/?p=1060"},"modified":"2010-03-20T05:07:13","modified_gmt":"2010-03-20T09:07:13","slug":"the-top-ten-kick-ass-moments","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/2010\/03\/20\/the-top-ten-kick-ass-moments\/","title":{"rendered":"The Top Ten "Kick Ass" Moments"},"content":{"rendered":"

Well, it’s coming, yet another superhero comic adaptation but thankfully this one is different. If you’ve never read it before, “Kick-Ass” is not so much about superheroes as it is about regular narcissistic everyday people putting on costumes and trying to fight crime and somehow finding themselves becoming real costumed superheroes when they just happen to crash in to a real life villain who wants them dead at all costs. There’s a violent karate fighting nine year old, a lot of really disgusting violence, and a storyline that is more realistic than most comic books tend to be. “Kick-Ass” does not stylize being a superhero. It’s rough to read.<\/p>\n

Coming up on April 16th is the big screen version with an interesting cast who are threatening to take the box-office by storm and if you’ve ever seen the appealing trailers, you’ll know that we’re in for something quite spectacular. After reading the comic series a while ago, I thought it’d be good to pinpoint the top ten moments in “Kick-Ass” that particularly disturbed or excited us. Believe it or not, “Kick-Ass” is quite a good comic with a creator who managed to make history in comics by creating “Wanted,” another very violent comic turned in to a hit movie starring Angelina Jolie and Morgan Freeman. “Kick-Ass” is a bit more conventional, but damn it looks quite good in spite of Millar’s apparent homophobia and penchant for racial stereotyping. So without further ado…<\/p>\n

Warning, since the comic is somewhat similar to the movie, there will be potential spoilers.<\/p>\n

IT’S NOT AS EASY AS IT LOOKS<\/strong>
\n\"\"The introduction to the narrative of “Kick Ass” actually managed to fool me. For a comic series that purports to display a brutal realistic look at someone trying in vain to be a superhero, this series of scenes involving a winged superhero is very stylized and action packed and instantly made me second guess Mark Millar. Then we see him fall to his death mid-way and crash in to a Taxi suffering a rather horrific death in front of a crowd of on-lookers and then I suddenly realized that Mark Millar was not going to let us off so easily. We’ve seen normal people become superheroes in comics like Batman, Daredevil, and Spider-Man and we never quite managed to witness the consequences.<\/p>\n

I can just imagine the person behind this costume who rigged a device for months, spent all of their money, used up all of their precious time and all for this disastrous leap to their deaths just because their damn wings wouldn’t allow them to glide as they’d hoped. Further selling this hilarious opening is the fact that the reader assumes this is the main character when really it’s just another look at what happens when normal people try to emulate the comic books and fail. Big time. Sadly the trailer for the film gives away the little hook.<\/p>\n

KICK ASS = ASS KICKED<\/strong>
\n\"\"Millar not only explores the need to don a costume and fight crime, but also the thrill putting on a costume. Our main character Dave gets such a thrill he proudly proclaims that he hasn’t looked at porn in weeks because of his crusade to be a superhero and this reveals his tendencies for masochism. This results in a brutal ass kicking as in an attempt to stop graffiti artists, he’s beaten, gets kicked in the crotch, beaten some more and then is stabbed right in the chest. To top that off he staggers off with his guts falling out and is run over by a hit and run driver leaving his mangled body to fade away on the pavement.<\/p>\n

And almost taking pride in this fact, Millar follows this grizzly scene by beginning the second issue by showing Dave in the hospital in very critical condition almost exploring his need for pain as a form of pleasure while also subtly wagging his finger at readers warning us rabid fan boys not to even try to do something like this. Because you can get hurt and very likely killed. And you may wake up naked in a pool of your own blood, too. I can’t decide which death would be more humiliating.<\/p>\n

SHE WAS LIKE JOHN RAMBO MEETS POLLY POCKET.<\/strong>
\n\"\"After reaping the rewards of his instant fame Dave manages to completely idolize himself by advertising his services. He starts a MySpace page, is featured on talk shows and even manages to be cheered on in the streets. After starting an online service, he agrees to talk to the ex of a girl who has been taunted by her boyfriend for a while. Taking it upon himself to be the ever vigilant protector and self-important crusader, he goes to talk to the man. It’s just a shame he’s guarded by humongous bodyguards and friends who take pride in defending him at a moment’s notice.<\/p>\n

Kick Ass is in yet another bind being kicked up and down a room by a greasy hooker and a bunch of big black guys. That is until the leader is impaled in front of the entire group. And as Kick Ass looks on he realizes he’s just been saved and is at the mercy of Hit Girl, a petite child who knows how to make suckers pay if they even try to cross her. Her wide eyed enthusiasm for the kills just makes this character even more likable and disturbing. If you didn’t think impaling a man could get any worse for a little kid, then the following panels depicting her reign of gore perfectly explores the sick minds that would get behind a costume and fight crime. I almost felt bad for that greasy hooker.<\/p>\n

BIG DADDY AND HIT GIRL<\/strong>
\n\"\"The origin of Big Daddy and Hit Girl isn’t as demented as perceived in the trailers. In fact in the comics it’s darker and more disturbing. But that’s Mark Millar for you. If you think watching a little girl get blown away by her dad in the movie is bothersome, then Millar makes it all the more stunning when we see the lack of mercy her dad takes on her by calling her a cry baby, taunting her when she doesn’t want to get shot and then proceeding to blow her away in a big splash.<\/p>\n

Then when he mocks her for flinching in pain, he reminds her to stab a crack head in the nuts if she’s ever shot by one, and then volunteers to take her out for a Sundae. Oddly enough Hit Girl doesn’t mind it too much. To a further odd degree we learn in the following pages that she was taught to be a warrior from a very, very young age and didn’t even go to school. Thank heaven for little girls.
\nHIDDEN AGENDA<\/strong>
\n\"\"As with most writers, Mark Millar’s works stand as a hidden agenda for the man’s views. He’s not the first comic writer to do it. People like Frank Miller, and Stan Lee have been doing it for years through their work and here it’s no real big surprise that he’s a gun loving, violence adoring, action loving man whose characters revel in gun trivia and blood spewing while enjoying their hobbies.<\/p>\n

In one page, Big Daddy quizzes his daughter on weapons and movie stars as she takes down a room full of thugs in the distance and eventually asks for the definition of a Democrat, to which is becomes painfully clear that not only is Big Daddy training and conditioning this kid to be his exact double and push his propaganda, but so is Millar in the long run. Every artist pours himself in to his work, and Millar is just no exception. He is Big Daddy and if we don’t watch out, we could be Hit Girl.
\nTHE RED MIST TURN COAT<\/strong>
\n\"\"The whole situation seemed much too easy from the beginning if you pay attention. The Red Mist was able to stop a lot of criminals without experiencing too much physical damage, had a fancy car and no real means of being able to pay for all of that. Finally when Hit Girl and Big Daddy manage to ensnare the two in a big plot to take down the local mob boss including a team up and a plan to turn on one another, issue six ends with a shocking finale that shows Big Daddy and Hit Girl getting the crap kicked out of them as the mob awaits their entrance and a familiar red hand holding a gun to Kick-Ass’s head.<\/p>\n

Who could it be, you ask? Well, it’s Red Mist. And he’s a traitorous mole who was sent to take down the heroes for his dad. It’s quite an interesting turn of events and the making of an actual villain. And then… Millar ruins it by having the Red Mist admitting to Kick Ass that he jerked off at the prospect of him being tortured. Millar you nut job.<\/p>\n

BIG DADDY’S REAL ORIGIN<\/strong>
\n\"\"As if it wasn’t clear in the beginning that Big Daddy was obviously lying to his daughter about their crusade to avenge their murdered mother and wanted to strike back at the mobsters who did it, the real origin of Big Daddy is pretty demented and quite pathetic. This man built like a boxer resembling Frank Castle is just another comic book fan boy fighting crime because his life is miserable.<\/p>\n

And if that’s not enough he brainwashed his child to do the exact same thing and put her in a really bad situation that cost her a lot of happiness. The resulting look from Kick Ass at this realization is just fantastic because maybe, perhaps he’s gotten the clue that the superhero business is a dead end. If that didn’t do it, then maybe the view of Big Daddy getting his skull blown apart at point blank rage would do the trick. Obviously getting his Tunk fried didn’t convince him.<\/p>\n

BUMP IT<\/strong>
\n\"\"As if Big Daddy’s life ending in a big explosion of brains and shattered skull with nothing to show for it but mint condition comics wasn’t bad enough, his daughter was so conditioned to be a killer that her life was at the point of no return. Regardless of what anyone did or said, all she ever knew was killing and it showed when she failed to mourn her father dying at the hands of vicious mobsters and did nothing but walk to the elevator prepared to murder people and, soaked in blood, decapitates two thugs, and heads up stairs to confront Mr. Genovese once and for all and avenge her father.<\/p>\n

Whether Big Daddy intended it or not, his custom made super-heroine had a purpose and she had someone in her life to avenge. Fiction was now reality, and she only wanted to kick some ass and live out her fantasy.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

CONDITION RED<\/strong>
\n\"\"“No way will this be in the movie!” I said while watching Hit Girl basically snort a bit of coke before heading up to mutilate a bunch of mobsters awaiting their entrance. While Millar works on the pretense that this is comic books coming to life in reality, there’s no doubting that everything in this story is absolutely pathetic. “Condition Red” Big Daddy tells his daughter is a secret weapon to use only in extreme emergencies. Halfway in to the elevator she proceeds to use it by snorting it and gaze absolutely wide-eyed readying to kick ass. Either she was still too ignorant to realize her dad had supplied her with a hefty amount of coke, or she was in such a state of denial that she believed this powder was meant as a weapon to give her super powers.<\/p>\n

Either way, though it’s not really identified, you can tell this girl is a coke addict from here on in, and she’s too far gone to be talked back in to sanity. The hilarity ensued as after Big Daddy gave his speech about not wanting his daughter to grow up loving American Idol, she’s revealed to be proudly wielding a “Hello Kitty” backpack. And yes, believe it or not flamethrowers are very legal to own, in case you were questioning the logic behind Hit Girl’s bath of flames on the mobsters awaiting them in the lobby.<\/p>\n

PATHETIC IS AS PATHETIC DOES<\/strong>
\n\"\"From the beginning Millar never had any sympathy for these characters. He beat them around, submitted them to a vicious series of events, mangled them, tortured them, mocked them, put them in stupid costumes, gave them dumb names, never asked you to really root for them, and in the end, nothing was actually accomplished. So Hit Girl’s end was happy but not so much. At the end of the day she massacred a bunch of people, her father died horribly, she endured a lot of bloodshed, snorted coke, and lost years of her precious life for a vain pursuit. And what about Kick Ass?<\/p>\n

Well… he got his balls fried, he got his teeth smashed, he got punched non-stop, and in the end he managed to re-unite a girl with her long lost mother. What does he do in the end? When he found little left in his life he professed his love for the girl of his dreams. And… he got the crap kicked out of him by her boyfriend. To make things worse he walks in on his dad humping on a girl he helped in previous issues who was obviously taking advantage of him, and then to finish it all off he is forced to witness the girl of his dreams having oral sex with her jealous boyfriend as he masturbates to the image and cries. The message is loud and clear: All we witnessed was a stupid fan boy being battered for nothing. He’s no hero. He’s a pathetic loser and that’s the person he’s doomed to become for the rest of his life. Even if with his newfound fame, he also managed to inspire a new breed of super villain waiting for him who also happen to be losers. No way will the movie end on this note.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Well, it’s coming, yet another superhero comic adaptation but thankfully this one is different. If you’ve never read it before, “Kick-Ass” is not so much about superheroes as it is about regular narcissistic everyday people putting on costumes and trying to fight crime and somehow finding themselves becoming real costumed superheroes when they just happen […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,14],"tags":[58,219,221,240,423,579,627,1004,1087],"class_list":["post-1060","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-list-junkies","category-rot-your-brain","tag-action","tag-comedy","tag-comic-book","tag-crime","tag-graphic-novel","tag-kick-ass","tag-mark-millar","tag-superhero","tag-thriller"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1060","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1060"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1060\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1060"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1060"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1060"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}