{"id":16278,"date":"2014-08-12T16:52:00","date_gmt":"2014-08-12T20:52:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/?p=16278"},"modified":"2016-08-12T00:12:31","modified_gmt":"2016-08-12T04:12:31","slug":"the-pc-thug-depression","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/2014\/08\/12\/the-pc-thug-depression\/","title":{"rendered":"The PC Thug: Depression"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"PCThug-logo\"<\/a><\/p>\n

I was going to make this article about Robin Williams and how much happiness he gave me, but that just didn\u2019t seem to fit for me. Surely Robin Williams dying is painful, heartbreaking, and really tragic. I grew up with \u201cMork and Mindy,\u201d \u201cHook,\u201d \u201cGood Will Hunting,\u201d and I watched him make people happy with stand up comedy, his appearances on talk shows, and his general love for humanity all around.<\/p>\n

What\u2019s really kept me on the verge of tears, is the knowledge that Robin Williams was the victim of depression and likely committed suicide.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut he was so funny! He always seemed so happy! I don\u2019t get it.\u201d Yes, you don\u2019t. You really don\u2019t. And the truth is, even victims of mental illness don\u2019t get it. We just live with it. I suffer from a mental illness.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

My mental illness is so extreme, that my last clinic told me they couldn\u2019t treat me since the case was well beyond their realm of expertise. I\u2019m not ashamed to admit that, and you shouldn’t be. Mental illness is something very unfairly demonized and stigmatized within our society. We have to stop treating mental illness like a skeleton in our closet, and start talking about it, and open the floor to people that need help.<\/p>\n

Anxiety, depression, PTSD, ADHD, manic disorder, it\u2019s all mocked, derided, or viewed as nothing but a hoax perpetrated by some mysterious shadow committee, and is not even considered a disease by some. Seeking help or treatment is still, in some corners, considered weak, a waste of time, and pointless. And if you consider any of these viewpoints remotely true or valid: Fuck you.<\/p>\n

In regards to my depression and anxiety, to this day I get the occasional \u201cJust walk it off,\u201d or \u201cDon\u2019t think about it,\u201d or \u201cWhat are you so worried about?\u201d along with \u201cJust don\u2019t panic.\u201d Not only do those replies completely make the sufferer of said disease feel completely dehumanized, but it\u2019s counteractive to helping the victim of the disease overcome their episode.<\/p>\n

Depression is a very real disease. It can be inherited or developed. It is painful. It is soul crushing and unbearable. In the worst depression episodes, you\u2019ll do anything to end the excruciating pain. I can\u2019t really express to you how many times I have wanted to merely stop the pain altogether, and would have thought of anything to ease it. Drugs, cutting, beer, you name it, I considered it. In 2010, I turned to alcohol and only at the angry demands of my father to stop the habit before it became an addiction did the potential for alcoholism not progress any further.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m lucky enough to where I have people behind me guiding me to avoid the pit falls that come with depression, but it\u2019s sometimes never enough. With depression, you always feel alone. It doesn\u2019t matter how many smiling faces are around you, how many people hug you and say they\u2019ll be there for you, you feel alone, and even worse: you feel like a burden that the world would be happier without.<\/p>\n

Over the last fifteen years I\u2019ve been diagnosed with a severe mental illness by many doctors and have been branded a severe case. Sometimes I\u2019ve even been asked by doctors to admit myself in to hospitals for long periods of observation. And no, it\u2019s not because of my parents. I have loving parents that help me as much as possible, and they\u2019ve never physically abused me in any way shape or form. But that\u2019s the rub. The older you get, the harder it becomes to reach out and talk depression sufferers off of the ledge.<\/p>\n

Imagine you\u2019re being told by your family how much they love you, and want you, and how important you are to the world. Then imagine going to bed, and your brain is saying \u201cThey\u2019re lying to make you feel better. They\u2019d be so much better off without you. They wouldn\u2019t worry so much, they wouldn\u2019t have to look after you, or make sure you were okay. Maybe if you just did something about it, you could solve everyone\u2019s problems.\u201d Sometimes, in that vulnerable state it\u2019s tough to argue with what your mind is telling you. And it\u2019s tough to trust your thoughts.<\/p>\n

The fact is depression is a real illness. It\u2019s a terrible horrific illness I wouldn\u2019t wish on anyone, no matter how much I hated them. And depression makes you feel alone. It makes you feel like no one understands you.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re not alone. You may feel it, but you\u2019re not alone. There are many people out there going through the pain with you. I\u2019ve battled depression since I was a child, and I\u2019m still living day to day through the pain.<\/p>\n

Robin Williams death has had a profound effect on me. Because I grew up with his movies, and entertainment. Because he made me laugh more times than I could count. Because I genuinely loved the person he was. And because through all accounts, he was a very kind person. And we\u2019ve lost him, thanks to depression and mental illness. There\u2019s never going to be another Robin Williams, and he brought joy in to my world, despite the fact he was suffering for years.<\/p>\n

To those suffering from any kind of mental illness, remember you\u2019re not alone. Reach out to whoever or whomever you can and look for someone that can talk you off the ledge.<\/p>\n

If you know someone who is suffering, don\u2019t dismiss them, don\u2019t belittle them, and don\u2019t mock them. Be there for them, and always show them that they have a partner in battling their mental illness.<\/p>\n

I hope you\u2019ve found peace, Mr. Williams. Thanks for so many years of joy and laughter.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I was going to make this article about Robin Williams and how much happiness he gave me, but that just didn\u2019t seem to fit for me. Surely Robin Williams dying is painful, heartbreaking, and really tragic. I grew up with \u201cMork and Mindy,\u201d \u201cHook,\u201d \u201cGood Will Hunting,\u201d and I watched him make people happy with […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[495,1253,862],"class_list":["post-16278","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-pcthugs","tag-in-memorium","tag-psychology","tag-robin-williams"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16278","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16278"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16278\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21834,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16278\/revisions\/21834"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16278"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16278"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16278"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}