{"id":3207,"date":"2006-10-16T17:21:48","date_gmt":"2006-10-16T21:21:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cinemacrazed.wordpress.com\/?p=3207"},"modified":"2006-10-16T17:21:48","modified_gmt":"2006-10-16T21:21:48","slug":"feast-2005","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/2006\/10\/16\/feast-2005\/","title":{"rendered":"Feast (2005)"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"So, after an okay last season of \u201cProject Greenlight\u201d with Cleftatron Affleck, and Dimples Damon you probably wonder: \u201cDid they actually spit a good movie from this show?\u201d Well, I\u2019ll say this: Even the goose shits a few times before laying a golden egg, and \u201cFeast\u201d is shockingly the golden egg after the two previous shits that were \u201cThe Battle of Shaker Heights\u201d and \u201cStolen Summer.\u201d Shocked? I still am. A group of strangers, the middle of nowhere, a rundown bar, a grizzled bartender, and an ass load of monsters. Sound familiar to you, doesn\u2019t it?<\/p>\n

Well, have no fear, \u201cFeast\u201d has the distinction of being the same old shit with its own little features that make it unique just the same. Whatever you\u2019re expecting to see during \u201cFeast,\u201d whatever you think will happen you smug horror loving son of a bitch, trust me, Gulager rips them to shreds. As misanthropic horror buff whose seen it all, I was stunned, surprised, and completely taken for a loop to what happens during this gorgy. \u201cFeast,\u201d is a horror love fest, it\u2019s a film that will be deemed a horror masterpiece, or a piece of shit, but I know fans will be inclined to discuss this for hours, and that\u2019s why it\u2019s so effective. Gulager\u2019s first of (hopefully) his career is cheesy, stupid, fun, and ballsy: This pure guilty pleasure is grind house up and down, and best of all Gulager takes the horror character clich\u00e9s, and conventions, bends them over and has a hell of a time breaking them in two.<\/p>\n

A group of people in a dusty bar are greeted with a woman who warns that monsters are following her and they\u2019re intent on eating her alive. Now, the group, left with no other option, has to stay in the bar and fend off these impossibly invincible beasts, or else be dinner. Gulager\u2019s film basically stands alone from all the other horror dreck, not only because of the simply nauseating violence, but because of the stand out characters he sets up with intro\u2019s and disposing of them defying the character set-ups. Characters we think will die rarely do, and the characters we think will survive don\u2019t live long enough to see the end credits. Gulager and screenwriters Dunston and Melton have fun with these people and once an important character goes, we\u2019re not sure who will die next.<\/p>\n

\u201cFeast\u201d comes off more like a sequel to \u201cFrom Dusk Til Dawn\u201d with an \u201cEvil Dead\u201d twist, and it never takes itself too seriously in the face of its genre. The dialogue is utterly hokey, the situations are ridiculous and the most of the cast never hesitate to chew the scenery. Navi Rawat is utterly sexy as heroine pulling a performance in the vein of Campbell of \u201cEvil Dead,\u201d while Krista Allen pulls in a respectable performance as the single mom\/waitress Tuffy. Henry Rollins is hilarious as a bullshit motivational speaker who insists on giving inspirational speeches every five minutes while contributing nothing, and Balthazar Getty as a tough guy who\u2019s all talk and little action is priceless. Josh Zuckerman is the stand out as \u201cHot Wheels\u201d the only seemingly sane person in the group of survivors, who watches everything from the confines of his wheelchair devising methods to trick the monsters.<\/p>\n

In spite of the over the top acting, all the characters are likable, and the actors give very good performances on par with a film of this caliber. \u201cFeast\u201d is a satisfying roll in the horror sack, and I flipped for it. Sadly “Feast” is made an occasionally difficult experience thanks to utterly chaotic, and inept editing that is never sure how to handle the carnage occurring in this bar. The monsters are cut away from, and the action sequences are chopped up so incessantly, it’s almost impossible to make out who is taking part in the battles. In spite of wired spastic editing, \u201cFeast\u201d blew me away. It kicked my ass, threw me out a window, and spit in my face. Excellent directing, over the top acting, literally nauseating gore, and a story that lays all the clich\u00e9s on the table while breaking them in two. Mark my words, there\u2019s nothing predictable about this. This is a horror movie.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

So, after an okay last season of \u201cProject Greenlight\u201d with Cleftatron Affleck, and Dimples Damon you probably wonder: \u201cDid they actually spit a good movie from this show?\u201d Well, I\u2019ll say this: Even the goose shits a few times before laying a golden egg, and \u201cFeast\u201d is shockingly the golden egg after the two previous […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,12],"tags":[58,219,338,477,678,1087],"class_list":["post-3207","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-halloween-horror-month","category-movie-reviews","tag-action","tag-comedy","tag-f","tag-horror","tag-monsters","tag-thriller"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3207","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3207"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3207\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3207"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3207"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3207"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}