{"id":42480,"date":"2024-01-29T00:11:52","date_gmt":"2024-01-29T05:11:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/?p=42480"},"modified":"2024-01-28T20:54:30","modified_gmt":"2024-01-29T01:54:30","slug":"bad-movie-monday-a-boy-and-his-dog-1975","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cinema-crazed.com\/blog\/2024\/01\/29\/bad-movie-monday-a-boy-and-his-dog-1975\/","title":{"rendered":"BAD MOVIE MONDAY: A BOY AND HIS DOG (1975)"},"content":{"rendered":"

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It\u2019s a bit of a misconception about me to say that I hate modern movies and have a particular loathing reserved towards the superhero genre. I do not. Well, not exactly anyway. What has happened is that I\u2019ve grown extremely weary of films that are written in this very mundane \u201cScreenwriting 101\u201d style. Almost every movie made these days is about a hero\u2019s journey or a redemption arc or some sort of variation on a theme outlined in SAVE THE CAT! Which is a book about screenwriting that Hollywood seems to treat like it\u2019s the Holy Bible of Cinema.<\/p>\n

This is why I really respect a movie like A BOY AND HIS DOG. If nothing else, it\u2019s definitely not formulaic.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Of course, I also didn\u2019t think it was very good, but so what? At this point in my life I\u2019d rather watch a bad movie with grand ideas and even grander aspirations than a bland formulaic movie whose loftiest goal is to sucker me into paying to go see the stupid thing in the theatre.<\/p>\n

I watched A BOY AND HIS DOG with friends last Monday and none of us enjoyed it. We felt it was badly paced, had only the most bare bones of plot, and that all the characters were so loathsome that it was hard to root for or empathize with anyone. Yet, this got me thinking about how the movie industry kind of shifted in the 1980s towards fast paced audience pleasing blockbusters rather than the \u201cmovie\u201d movies they used to make. (NOTE: I\u2019m not saying that all Hollywood movies made before the 80\u2019s were exclusively intellectual fare or anything. I\u2019m not a nostalgic fool, but they often felt like they were written by adults and for adults at least.) Nowadays, there\u2019s no subtlety or nuance in most mainstream cinema. Nor do audiences expect it. Everything is spoon fed and dumbed down, and I think that this affects us more than we think. It\u2019s like if you eat junk food too often. It\u2019ll kill your taste buds and make you sick to your stomach.<\/p>\n

I also got to thinking that if A BOY AND HIS DOG was remade today by a big company like Disney it would probably earn about a half a billion dollars at the box office. Because a big studio would make the whole thing a lot more fun to watch and much more exciting and engaging, all while simultaneously ruining every ounce of artistic integrity the film once possessed.<\/p>\n

So what I think I\u2019m going to do is try to recount the film\u2019s synopsis, interspersing it with a bit of commentary here and there, and then make a list of ten ways that a big studio would have changed various aspects of the screenplay in order to make it into the usual low-expectation, intellectually undemanding, crowd pleasing, advertiser friendly, all-the-time fun time, bullshit movie.<\/p>\n

SYNOPSIS:
\n<\/strong>We open in what I assume is post-apocalyptic Kansas in the far away future of 2024, decades after both World War 3 and 4 were fought. Survivors, most of which are teenage boys, roam the land in search of food and sex, although not usually in that order. Here we are introduced to our protagonist Vic (Don Johnson) a solo raider with a telepathic dog named Blood.<\/p>\n

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It sounds like it could be kind of cute, a plucky boy having adventures with his fluffy talking dog, until you realize that Blood\u2019s \u201cjob\u201d is to find women for Vic to sexually assault. In return Vic provides the dog with food and protection. As toxic as this relationship is, there are a few soft moments. Blood is always trying to teach Vic about history and culture, trying to educate the savagery out of the boy and show him how to think with more than his genitals. In fact, you could say that they have a kind of Father\/Son relationship since Vic lost his parents many years ago. Blood also often tries to convince Vic to look for a place called \u201cOver The Hill\u201d which is supposedly an above ground utopia. Of course, Vic dismisses this as a pipe dream.<\/p>\n

During a \u201cmovie show\u201d at a local shanty town, basically just a showing of a bunch of old violent stag films; Blood senses a female nearby. Vic is incredulous that any woman would come near here but Blood insists that there is one, disguised as a boy. Vic and Blood follow this supposed girl down to an old school that\u2019s been buried under rubble after she leaves the show. There, we see that Blood was right about her gender as she changes out of her raider outfit and into a dress, but before Vic can assault her, he has to fight off other raiders who also have a dog that sensed a woman down here. Blood is hurt in the fight but they manage to chase them all off after Blood pretends he\u2019s a mutant \u201cScreamer\u201d by imitating their howls. However, the sound attracts actual mutants and Vic, Blood, and the girl, all run.<\/p>\n

Finally safe, the girl has consensual sex with Vic out of gratitude and tells him that her name is Quilla June and that she comes from a place called Down Under, which is a city that was built under the ruins of Topeka, Kansas. Vic has heard of such places and is not impressed. We also learn here that only Vic can hear Blood talk. Quilla June can\u2019t hear him at all. Vic says that he and Blood have a \u201cfeel\u201d for each other, a special bond.<\/p>\n

By the way, I\u2019d like to mention here that by this point we are a little past 50 minutes into this 90 minute movie and nothing has happened except the handful of things that I\u2019ve outlined above and some filler to pad out the runtime. Some of dialogue is quite good, but man alive does this feel stretched out to the point of snapping.<\/p>\n

Anyway, Quilla June invites Vic to come with her to the Downunder, but Vic refuses and tells Quilla June that she\u2019s going to stay with him instead. (TRANSLATION: He\u2019s going to MAKE her stay with him.) Blood then takes Vic aside and chastises him for wanting to keep the girl around. He doesn\u2019t see the value in an extra mouth to feed since they\u2019re barely surviving as it is. Of course this is all moot since Quilla June knocks Vic unconscious and runs back to her home. Undeterred, Vic tracks the girl to the entrance of the Downunder, much to the consternation of Blood who pleads with Vic not to go in there and leave him alone in the desert with no food or protection. Vic tells Blood that he has to go and abandons his dog at the entrance, making vague promises of coming back soon.<\/p>\n

With Blood staying behind, Vic climbs down a huge ladder and through multiple corridors, past loud machinery, deep into the Earth. He ends up in what I can only describe as \u201c1950s Small Town Hell.\u201d It\u2019s underground, probably a cave, but everywhere there is grass and white picket fences and trees and mid-century architecture. All under a pitch black \u201csky\u201d of permanent night.<\/p>\n

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Vic is immediately captured of course. I have to say that director L.Q. Jones is rather good at efficiently introducing this weird nightmarish place using editing and multiple odd vignettes that only last a few seconds each. All the inhabitants wear clown makeup and dress as if this was a small American town in 1955. It really does feel like a demented and perverse place. We are privy to barbershop quartets, school marching bands, picnics, and a committee of elders led by Lou Craddock (Jason Robards) who hold the iron rule over life and death towards the inhabitants, and sending anyone who shows even the slightest bit of rebellion to \u201cThe Farm.\u201d<\/p>\n

Quilla June meets with Craddock and asks him when she\u2019ll get a spot on the committee, seeing as she risked her life to trap an outsider down here. Quilla has her own ambitions, none of which involve cosplaying as a 1950s wife and mother. Craddock fa-fa\u2019s her concerns with promises that her time will come and sends her on her way. Quilla June, nothing if not perceptive, begins to scheme something new to avoid a lifetime of being some clown faced weirdo\u2019s broodmare and servant girl.<\/p>\n

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On his end, Vic is bathed and given new clothes and then taken to see Craddock and the other leaders where he\u2019s informed that he\u2019s to impregnate thirty-five women. At first, Vic is giddy with joy because he\u2019s such a fucking idiot. This moment is when the film reminds me most of A CLOCKWORK ORANGE. Where we realize that, as much evil as Vic has committed, it\u2019s nothing compared to the evil of those who wield true power. Vic soon finds out that he\u2019s not going to have sex with anyone. They\u2019re just going to tie him to a table and use electrodes to shock sperm out of him, until they\u2019ve got their 35 samples.<\/p>\n

After that, it\u2019s The Farm for him. It\u2019s hard to feel too sorry for the guy to be honest.<\/p>\n

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Eventually, in an act not motivated by kindness or altruism in the least, Quilla June comes to save Vic. Not because she likes him, but because she can use him to try and kill the committee that has refused to give her a spot. If she can\u2019t win by winning, she\u2019ll win by cheating. Not the worst tactic. It\u2019s worked often enough in politics, and Quilla June is certainly a born politician. She tells Vic that she wants to run this place with him. Vic, knowing a bit more about violence and rebellion than she does, is very skeptical. One can imagine that, in his mind, he\u2019s already wondering how he\u2019s going to ditch this crazy broad and make a run for it.<\/p>\n

Quilla June helps him find his guns, his \u201cheat\u201d, after which they run outside of the building they were trapped to meet up with three rebels from Quilla June\u2019s tiny group. Once there, Vic simply walks away looking for the exit. He has no interest in what\u2019s going to happen here. \u201cI need to crawl in the dirt so I can feel clean again!\u201d He says.<\/p>\n

Quilla June, undaunted tells him \u201cI didn\u2019t bring down here so they could use you. I brought you down here so I could use you!\u201d seeing that the Committee has called a special meeting, and is sentencing everyone in the Rebel Group (including Quilla June) to death. Vic then watches apathetically as the rebels are killed one by one by Michael, the human looking robot enforcer for the Committee, Shades of Terminator. Desperate, Quilla June plays her last card and tells Vic that she\u2019ll show him the way out if he takes her with him. This peaks his interest and he follows her as they\u2019re both chased by Michael in a not a particularly tense or action packed scene, as Vic is eventually able to kill the robot after shooting it about twenty times.<\/p>\n

Finally, Vic and Quilla June make their way outside where they find Blood dying of starvation. He has had almost nothing to eat since the last time he saw Vic several days ago. Unfortunately, Vic didn\u2019t bring any food with him. He suggests taking the dog to a nearby town, but Blood tells him that raiders have destroyed it. There\u2019s nothing there anymore. Blood then tells Vic to go without him and save himself. A statement that Quilla June very much agrees with. She tells him he should abandon the dog and that she\u2019ll take care of him from now on.<\/p>\n

Fade to black, after which we return to Vic and Blood sitting by a roaring fire. \u201cYou haven\u2019t eaten a bite.\u201d Blood says. \u201cI\u2019m not hungry.\u201d Vic tells him in a slightly queasy voice, implying that what\u2019s cooking on the spit is Quilla June. The two then walk off into the sunset as Vic says, feeling mildly guilty about what he did, that it wasn\u2019t his fault that Quilla June picked him to help her and sealed her fate. \u201cWell, I’d certainly say she had marvellous judgment, if not particularly good taste.\u201d Blood then laughs.<\/p>\n

THE END<\/strong><\/p>\n

The Top Ten Changes That A Big Studio Would Have Made To Ruin This Movie
\n<\/strong>#1 \u2013 Ixnay on the Aperay and the Annibalismcay. Sexual assault and the consumption of human flesh do not sell Funko Pop figures too well. So that\u2019s gone. Down the memory hole they both go. Never to be mentioned or acknowledged again.<\/p>\n

#2 \u2013 Vic wouldn\u2019t be a cold blooded killer and rapist in a Hollywood movie. He\u2019d be some kind of bad dude of course, but not too bad. He\u2019d be more like one of Peter Pan\u2019s Lost Boys and less like one of the kids in Lord of the Flies.<\/p>\n

#3 \u2013 Quilla June\u2019s back story would definitely get fleshed out in a Hollywood film. To be fair, I\u2019d totally agree with this. She is the most compelling character in the film. She comes from a place where women are treated like cattle, and so her actions are least understandable even though that doesn\u2019t make her any less evil or selfish than anyone else. Her goal in the film isn\u2019t to save any of the inhabitants of Downunder from the cruelty and tyranny of their leaders. She just wants to replace it with her own cruelty and tyranny.<\/p>\n

#4 \u2013 Hollywood certainly wouldn\u2019t let the dog disappear from the story for a third of the movie. He\u2019d be their biggest draw and they\u2019d want him front and centre. Can you imagine Blood plushies being sold next to replicas of Vic\u2019s visor hat? I sure as hell can. I can also imagine that they\u2019d add more telepathic dogs to the movie in order to make as many toys as possible.<\/p>\n

#5 \u2013 If Hollywood made this into a cutesey animated animated movie, not a completely ridiculous idea since the fairy tales that most animated films are based on are often darker and more violent than this movie, you\u2019d see musical numbers galore. Vic and Blood would burst into song, yodeling about \u201cOver The Hill\u201d or some such nonsense. All written by someone like Ed Sheeran.<\/p>\n

#6 \u2013 I don\u2019t think Hollywood would change much about the Downunder location. Although, there would be more CGI and instead of it being a small town of maybe a few hundred people, there would be thousands or even millions down there. Also, nowadays they\u2019d be imitating 80\u2019s Reagan America with high top sneakers, Country music, and casual homophobia, not 50\u2019s Apple Pie America with poodle skirts, rock and roll, and misogyny.<\/p>\n

#7 \u2013 One big change that a big Hollywood studio would bring is that the audience would constantly be told what to feel. Just take the scene where Vic abandons Blood at the entrance to Downunder. After the door closes and he\u2019s left to fend for himself, Blood goes \u201cSo long… partner.\u201d and there\u2019s a little bit of sad music and a very quick shot of the dog sitting alone by the door. It\u2019s a quiet moment of heartbreak because, despite the fact that both of these characters are kind of bad guys, to put it mildly, we feel for Blood.<\/p>\n

In this cruel and ravaged world, anyone can starve or die at any time, but if you have a friend then at least you don\u2019t have to starve or die alone. Hollywood would not allow this kind of nuance and introspection. Instead, the music would soar into an orgy of tragedy and it would literally start to rain, because rain looks like tears. The Hollywood version would try so hard to feel sad that it would inadvertently do the opposite and just feel contrived and manipulative.<\/p>\n

#8 \u2013 Much more lore, and back story. Everyone would have some sort of ridiculous connection. Vic couldn\u2019t just be some ordinary everyday pervert wandering alone out in post-apocalyptic Kansas with a dog he found. No, he\u2019d have to be unknowingly telepathic and probably telekinetic too, and he\u2019d have to come from Downunder, and Jason Robards would have to be his father, and he\u2019d have to have been part of a scientific experiment to make him able to talk to animals and control things with his mind.<\/p>\n

#9 \u2013 Definitely more action at the end. The fight between Vic and the robot enforcer Michael would not just have involved shooting him about a dozen times and then running away. They would have ended up in a sparks and fire factory fighting each during a forklift chase or something.<\/p>\n

#10 \u2013 Vic would in some way \u201cSave The World,\u201d which is my name for the fake happy endings in film where it ends with the hero having saved everything and everyone, or at least the important people. Vic certainly wouldn\u2019t have killed, skinned, butchered and cooked Quilla June.<\/p>\n

WAS IT REALLY A BAD MOVIE?
\n<\/strong>No, it\u2019s not a bad movie. I think that what\u2019s happened is that modern cinema has ruined our collective ability to enjoy movies that aren\u2019t fast paced and thrilling and engaging in the same way that fast food ruined people\u2019s ability to enjoy food that isn\u2019t spicy or salty or sweet. Modern audiences find it hard to perform the act of \u201ccreative viewing\u201d nowadays. This is when a film gives us all the ingredients to be entertained or enlightened, and all we have to do is simply mix those ingredients together in our heads. I find it hard too, and I think that\u2019s why I didn\u2019t enjoy this movie until I sat down and started thinking about it more.<\/p>\n

To me, A BOY AND HIS DOG is an allegory about the difficult transition into adulthood. It\u2019s a story about how the pain of loss and the depth of love is the only thing that can change a person for the better. The last scene, as Vic and Blood walk away together, you can see that Vic is a bit more human now. Yes, he\u2019s still a horrible person, but he\u2019s a horrible person that selflessly saved his only friend. He has, in his own very small way, grown up and stopped being a boy and started being a man. Is this what the movie was trying to say? I don\u2019t know. Is that what the novella was trying to say? I don\u2019t know. It doesn\u2019t matter. This is what I took out of the movie and I think that this is a positive thing to see, even if the movie isn\u2019t about positive people who perform positive heroic acts. That\u2019s all that matters.<\/p>\n

I also think that what I admire most about this film and what I find truly refreshing is that at no time does the film tell me what to feel or what to think. It just exists and expects me to be mature enough to make up my own mind.<\/p>\n

That, in its own strange way, feels blissful.<\/p>\n

A BOY AND HIS DOG is a 1975 Science Fiction movie starring Don Johnson, Tim McIntire as “Blood” (voice), Susanne Benton as Quilla June Holmes, and Jason Robards as Lou Craddock. It was written and directed by L.Q. Jones based on a novella by Harlan Ellison.<\/p>\n

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