BOOTLEG FILES 889: “Bob Hope’s Comedy Christmas Special” (1976 television offering wit guests John Wayne, Dyan Cannon and Neil Sedaka).
LAST SEEN: On YouTube.
AMERICAN HOME VIDEO: None.
REASON FOR BOOTLEG STATUS: A perceived lack of commercial viability.
CHANCES OF SEEING A COMMERCIAL DVD RELEASE: No thanks for these memories!
On this day in 1976, NBC showed its contempt for the American public by broadcasting “Bob Hope’s Comedy Christmas Special” in prime time.
Okay, maybe that introduction was a wee bit harsh. This particular production wasn’t that bad – but as with most of Hope’s 1970s specials, it wasn’t that good, either. While Hope managed to score a number of humorous one-liners in this 90-minute presentation, the show was mostly too safe, too sedate and too square to resonate.
The show opens with Hope dressed up as Santa Claus while Dyan Cannon plays Mrs. Claus – she can’t keep a straight face while dropping unsubtle wisecracks about her “jelly belly” husband and moaning about keeping company with elves – “All you get from them is small talk.” Hope’s Santa is facing a strike by his reindeer, so he brings in four starlets to pull his sleigh. Mrs. Claus orders the starlets into the sleigh and tells Santa to pull the sleigh – to which Hope’s Santa complains, “One moment you’re in charge, the next minute you’re taking orders from a woman. Now I know how Harry Reasoner feels.” (And if you don’t understand that joke – well, you’re too young to be reading this!)
The show then goes into Hope’s monologue, which was always the highlight of his specials. While some of his one-liners were lamentable – he mentioned how his sponsor Texaco snagged “the oil drilling rights to Tony Orlando’s hair” – others were on target. For instance, he noted how President-elect Jimmy Carter and Secretary of State Henry Kissinger “had a wonderful meeting, the two of them and their interpreters.” And he pointed to Elizabeth Taylor’s latest marriage: “Other brides say ‘I do,’ Liz just yells ‘One more time.’”
In this production, Hope makes repeated references to the popular programming on television. In one skit, he dons a leather jacket and slick black wig to spoof Henry Winkler’s Fonzie, and in another he parodies the Six Million Dollar Man franchise. Kate Jackson, who was starring in the hit series “Charlie’s Angels,” shares a conversational appearance with Hope – both are clearly reading from cue cards – but there is one genuinely funny moment when the discussion turns to popular dolls and Hope refers to the “Gore Vi-doll – it just makes nasty remarks about the other dolls.”
Unfortunately, “Bob Hope’s Comedy Christmas Special” follows the predictable formula that permeated Hope’s Yuletide shows – a lengthy segment with the Associated Press’ All-America Football Team (where they athletes introduce themselves and Hope makes mild jokes at their expense) and conversational exchanges with beauty pageant winners (in this case, Miss America, Miss Teen America and the decorative lovelies of the Tournament of Roses Parade). There are also musical numbers that are less than memorable – Neil Sedaka and Lola Falana perform solos that never tap into their respective charisma while Hope shares “Silver Bells” with a none-too-melodic Dyan Cannon.
Still, the show has a couple of surprises – John Wayne gamely attempts sketch comedy by playing a psychiatrist who has Hope’s Ebenezer Scrooge as a client, and later the two old stars sit by a fireplace to share a pleasant exchange of nostalgic memories. There is also an uncredited cameo by Johnny Carson in drag as his Aunt Blabby character.
In some ways, the most interesting thing about “Bob Hope’s Comedy Christmas Special” are the commercials from the show’s sponsor, Texaco. One spot pays tribute to the Americans who are stockholders in Texaco – now, that’s something you don’t see on TV today! – and another has Hope taking a tour of the sponsor’s facilities by announcing, “While Crosby has been squeezing oranges, I’ve been going places where Texaco is squeezing more oil out of our dwindling supplies.” Yup, you can’t have a Hope show without a zing at Bing.
“Bob Hope’s Comedy Christmas Special” was never rebroadcast after its airing on December 13, 1976, and to date the production has never been made available on any home entertainment format. However, the full show with the original commercials is on YouTube in a visually satisfactory (but unauthorized) upload. If you’re a Hope fan, have yourself an early Christmas present with this offering:
IMPORTANT NOTICE: While this weekly column acknowledges the presence of rare film and television productions through the so-called collector-to-collector market, this should not be seen as encouraging or condoning the unauthorized duplication and distribution of copyright-protected material, either through DVDs or Blu-ray discs or through postings on Internet video sites.
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