Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966) [Fantasia Film Festival]

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FANTASIA FILM FESTIVAL

“Plan Nine” is often cited as the worst film of all time, but I tend to disagree. Say what you want about Ed Wood’s schlock disaster, but it at least has a narrative to it. It’s a pitiful narrative, it’s unnecessarily convoluted, but it’s something. Hell, even “The Room” has some kind of narrative to it that resembles the worst romance melodrama seemingly derived from a Spanish novella. “Manos The Hands of Fate” (or in English: Hands The Hands of Fate?) is the template of how not to make a movie.

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Crimson Whale (2014) [Fantasia Film Festival]

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FANTASIA FILM FESTIVAL

I was completely mixed with “Crimson Whale” as a feature, because when you get down to it, it feels like it pads its run time. It’s only seventy minutes in length, and a lot of it feels like its treading water to get to the inevitable confrontation with its titular foe that happens to be anomaly of nature. “Crimson Whale” isn’t the worst anime film I’ve ever seen. It just isn’t all that good. It gets the distinction of being middle of the road mainly because it’s just so damn gloomy and mean spirited. It’s violent, and dark, and definitely does not thrive on supplying a happy ending. It barely has an ending, when you cut to the chase.

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