Classified (2024) 

A hitman is working his cases when a young woman shows up saying she is from MI6 and that his boss isn’t exactly on the up and up. 

Written by Bob DeRosa and directed by Roel Reiné, Classified is likely the beige-est film of the year. Everything here feels like it was washed to make sure it’s just as basic as it can be from the script to the direction to the acting to the settings to everything. The story here is predictable and will be especially so to anyone who watches action thrillers regularly. The story walks the beats as expected almost exactly by the book on its story timeline. The story isn’t bad, it’s also not great, it’s just incredibly bland. Yes, there are twists and turns but anyone who loves this genre will see these coming from a mile. Everything here is written and brought to the screen in the most generic beige way.  

The cast here is filled with talented people who feel like they are mostly wasted. These folks are capable of so much more acting-wise but most of them are saddled with some sadly bland characters. There was something there for both Aaron Eckhart Evan Shaw and Abigail Breslin as Kacey Walker, something much more than what the viewers get here. These characters had so much potential to have some emotional connections and story arc, but whatever there is ends up being a bit lame to be honest. These two actors have given much stronger performances many times before, so just pushing their characters a bit more would have given this film so much more depth and a better way for the viewer to connect with them and have stakes in the story. Joining them Tim Roth as Kevin Angler, the handler for Eckhart’s Shaw, a character that is more interesting here but likely mostly due to Roth’s capacity to bring a character to life and play this type in his sleep. The rest of the cast is most interchangeable, all playing variations on a beige theme, good guys or bad guys.  

In terms of cinematography, the film does look decent while using the locations it gets to their blandest. Seriously, some of those locations are stunning, but the way they are shot they might as well have not travelled anywhere. The cinematography here is by the film’s director Roel Reiné and it’s ok. The framing and lighting work, but there is no real style here, it’s just there. The editing Radu Ion is decent most of the time, making the most of the certain scenes and leaving other scenes to languish and die before they are cut away from. 

Classified is a film that feels like it had no ambitions, no goal beyond “making a film”. There is a story, it’s on the screen, but that is about all there is to say about it. Eckhart, Breslin, and Roth all feel wasted on these parts and in this film. The most frustrating part is that there is potential here and every single turn taken is straight into beige, bland land. 

As a last note, there is a strobe warning for the last third of the film.