Trigger warning: Suicide, grief
A grieving woman takes on the monumental task, quite literally, of accepting responsibility for her best friend’s bereaved Great Dane following his owner’s suicide, in The Friend, a touching and moving new film based on the novel of the same name by Sigrid Nunez.
If there’s one thing that’s always guaranteed to bring tears in a movie, it’s when you see a dog on the poster. It’s something I’ve become rather avoidant about in recent years after losing my own pets, too. I just can’t seem to handle it. Hachi: A Dog’s Tale just about did me in. That’s why, at first, I was apprehensive about The Friend. That and the fact that the promotional material for it was bordering on cornball. But with nothing else to see after spending the evening with my mom at the special presentation of The Notebook that I thoroughly hated, and not wanting to leave the theatre without doing a double feature with anything but that Jack Black atrocity, we decided to take our chances.
And I couldn’t be happier that we made that call.
Quickly drawing you in to the life and relationships of the characters on screen, the portrait painted within the first few minutes of the film sets the stage for what feels like an open and raw conversation about death, grief, depression, suicide, and everything in between. Focusing on realistic sides of these aspects of life without heavy handedness or flinching away when things get serious, The Friend manages to address anger, denial, sadness and hope with just the right dose of light-hearted comedy and finesse that makes it wholly relatable and heartwarming.
And a lot of that is all thanks to the writing and directing of Scott McGehee and David Siegel. Framing each shot in ways that feel realistic and without ever letting the characters fall into the pitfalls of corniness and unrealistic personalities that often plague these types of films, The Friend is endearing in all the right ways, leaving you feeling like every emotion you have in the wake of losing someone to suicide is valid and normal, and reminding you that one thing that unites us, even across species, is the grief of loss.
Utilizing broken personalities and expansive relationships that are complicated by an aging man’s attempts at holding onto youth, The Friend shows us the most perfect depiction of grief I’ve seen on screen in many years through Iris, played by the wonderful Naomi Watts. But even though she’s impeccable as always, and Bill Murray makes fantastic use of his brief amount of screen time as Walter, the real star of the show is none other than Apollo, played by the adorably emotive and beautiful Bing, the Great Dane. He manages to bring tears to your eyes with so much as a simple look, and the movie wouldn’t be the same if not for him. The supporting cast is stellar, as well, with every character feeling well thought out and real, and with an especially wonderful performance by Sarah Pidgeon as Walter’s recently reconnected estranged daughter.
With beautiful shots of New York City, and Apollo cast against various beautiful landscapes that show just how small we all are in the grand scheme of things, The Friend is a great work of art both in its emotion and its beauty, and there’s not much I can say about it in a negative light. The sets are superbly staged in an inviting way, the lighting is perfect for both day and night, and the color palette itself is indicative of the grief of the characters portrayed.
All in all, The Friend is an amazing portrait of bereavement that can affect us all, human or otherwise, and the amazing connections we can forge with animals through nothing but love and shared emotions. It addresses tough themes of suicide and depression, and makes a loud statement about the strength it takes to ask for help when you’re struggling.
And I think we could all use an emotional support dog like Apollo.