1. If you have to constantly explain to others why it’s not a bad movie, and start each defense with “I don’t care what anybody says”, and cite rental estimates, the chances are it’s indeed a bad movie. You’re defending a bad movie. Just admit it’s bad but you like it anyway, and move on.
2. If the cover of a film you spot in a video store is excellent with some incredible art, it’s an eighty-five percent chance the film is really bad.
3. Being in a lot of movies does not make them a good actor/actress, it just means they have a great agent.
3b. Being very good looking doesn’t also make them a good actor/actress. Good looks does not equal talent.
3c. If a movie tops the box office that does not make it automatically a good film. It’s not an argument.
4. Refusing to watch films because they are old, black and white, or have subtitles means you are just a movie fan, not a movie buff. And if you cite your reasoning for not liking subtitles with “I don’t like to read in movies”, then your intelligence is in question.
5. For the last time: Widescreen shows the whole picture, full screen doesn’t. Ever see the disclaimer “This film has been formatted to fit your television screen” before a movie? This means the original film in wide-screen was stretched to make it full screen which means the entire picture does not show up.
6. Winning an Oscar does not make that certain actor or actress fantastic. It’s a common fact some of the actors and actresses to win Oscars faded in to obscurity and or dove in to a career of really bad movies (i.e. Cuba Gooding Jr, Halle Berry). They were debatably fantastic for that one film, which is why they won, and possibly never again.
7. Christopher Lee says, and I agree: “The problem today, and I think it’s a very dangerous one for the people concerned, is that there are quite large numbers of very young men and women from 18 to 30, and they are playing very large parts in huge films and they simply, through no fault of their own, don’t have the background and the experience and the knowledge to pull if off. And it’s dangerous for them because if they are in one failure after another, sooner or later people are going to say, ‘Well, he may have a pretty face but he’s not bringing the public in.’ So many of these good-looking – sometimes even pretty – boys and girls are getting these good roles and it’s not fair on them. At some point it’s going to catch up.” Amen.
8. For theater goers:
Save your discussions about a particular actor/actress, save your ooh’s, aah’s, and commentary, save your negative response, save your bickering, save your play by play, save your questions about the plot holes, character origins, and plot twists for after the movie! And to all you foreigners, ask about special screenings that include subtitles, don’t be stupid and bring a translator who will mutter the lines to you and distract audiences. You bastard.
9. Saying a remake of a classic (especially one that I love) was great is okay. Saying it’s better than the original (especially if its a film I love), in my presence, is not a wise move, my friend. No, no.
10. Refusing to watch a black and white movie because “It was before your time” does not make a solid excuse; that excuse doesn’t hold especially with your ignorance toward a classic film. Many things were before your time, yet you miraculously were able to grab a hold of it and learn about it.