Breck Eisner’s high tension remake of the practically obscure George Romero horror film is much less biological horror film and much more Southern fried “28 Days Later,” with a small town being taken siege by an ambiguous and horrifying infection that turns people in to crazy people. What makes “The Crazies” such an entertaining slice of horror escapism is that it’s about as politically important as the “Dawn” remake was, but still manages to make an impression by being an awfully uneasy horror thriller. The disease that feeds upon the seemingly mild mannered people of Ogden Marsh is spontaneous, confusing, and almost completely unexplained. We never get a full idea of what the disease entails and when it can start to show signs and this allows for two elements among the story. It guarantees the element of surprise and mystery, while also allowing the writers to pop monsters up whenever they please chalking it up to the erratic effects of this disease.
They’ve found a slick way to create a deus ex machina by telling us as little as possible about this disease, and it works more often because the insanity of this situation makes it impossible to figure out who the crazies are and who the gun toting rednecks are. Even protagonists who show no signs of disease are constantly teetering on the edge of insanity filled with paranoia, psychotic tendencies and homicidal daring that allows the audience to figure out who is becoming a Crazy and who is just out of their minds from trauma. “The Crazies” takes the route of a zombie movie and Danny Boyle’s Brit Classic by turning its victims in to variations of infected. Sometimes they’re growling maniacal beasts, and sometimes psychopaths with a knack for collecting dead bodies.
After a seemingly isolated incident involving the local town drunk wielding a shotgun at the local school baseball game, David Dutten discovers he is face to face with a growing epidemic of a mysterious virus turning the normal town residents of slaw jacked yokels in to maniacal monsters, all of whom are unpredictable and merciless in their attacks. What Eisner’s remake does it create three enemies, one with the town folks, two with the military who are absolutely violent and unforgiving toward anyone they suspect is infected, and third the main characters, all of whom seem about as liable to crack under the pressure at any time, including Timothy Olyphant who isn’t always known for playing the most mentally stable individuals in film and television. This allow for a ninety minute session of running, hiding, and fighting for their lives as the characters are given their own motivations in this horror including character David whose wife (as portrayed by Radha Mitchell) is pregnant.
Though Olyphant and Mitchell give strong performances, Joe Anderson (doing his best Billy Crudup voice) takes the cake as loyal deputy Russell who is always at the right place at the right time and has such a sharp eye he could very well have been a superhero. Anderson makes due with the down to Earth character who is fiercely loyal to Olyphant’s protagonist providing a motivation for the character to escape the town all the while filled with the suspicion that he may be infected with whatever the script is writing for us. If it seems like I’m taking a piss at Eisner, it’s probably because in the end “The Crazies” much more a goofy attempt at serious horror than a serious attempt at any sort of horror masterpiece, but that doesn’t mean it’s not fun to sit and watch on a late night. One thing missing about Eisner’s remake is the humanity that is supposed to be present in the entire movie.
We’re thrown in to a small town in the middle of nowhere with a small variety of characters, and we know very little about any of them because Eisner is handed the task of jumping in to the violence before he can even allow the courtesy of getting to know and empathize with any of the protagonists. The movie even begins in carnage and jumps in to the serene town where the violence starts before we’re given time to soak in the peacefulness and unsettling calm before the storm. Meanwhile, Eisner’s entire film is reliant on convenient plot twists to the point where I wasn’t even worried about any of the characters after an hour. Even when people died, I was sure Olyphant and Mitchell would live to see the sequel, and surely enough I was right every time.
Anderson gives a strong performance, but his character is something of a goofy back up who always comes to Sheriff Dutten’s rescue at just the right time to allow for the audience to sweat a bit and thank goodness he manages to appear in the right scene without causing much of a stir. He seems to know how to get in to every building, he can get past anyone, and most of the time he possesses the talent of a marksman who should be in Afghanistan. Some scenes were so obviously convenient, I spent a lot of time trying to figure out when Anderson’s character would intervene to come to the sheriff’s rescue.
And I never really grasped what the disease was and how long it took to turn someone in to a crazy and the script relies on that for some attempted surprises while also begging us to turn against the main protagonists who mysteriously always seem to be at risk of infection but never quite get there while everyone else around them is so easily sickened. I wish “The Crazies” scared me to the bone, but in the end it’s just a slice of hokey horror escapism and nothing more. While no “28 Days Later,” Breck Eisner’s remake is a goofy but entertaining and creepy horror film with great special effects, some disturbing moments of carnage and about as much deus ex machinas that can fill ninety minutes. It’s surely no masterpiece, but it definitely will do the trick for anyone looking for a quick horror fix.
This movie will never be accused of reinventing the wheel or anything, but it knows what it is and gets the job done at least.