Matthew Saliba is an interesting gentleman. So far his film works have been heavily mired in giallo and exploitation, while presenting his shorts in a myriad of beautifully rendered photographs that tell more of a story than most short films. And if that’s not the kicker he offers up his own interpretation of a Grindhouse classic: “Vampyros Lesbos.” I’m not a big fan of the grindhouse original, but I was very much open to see what Saliba had to offer. As a photographer and director he can tell a damn strong story. Not to mention there be lesbians and vampire lesbians in this, so I saw this as soon as I received it. “Vampyros Lesbos” is an utterly ambitious interpretation from the outset presenting a demonstration not just in sexuality, but orgasmic storytelling told through a series of photographs that rely more on human expression and soul instead of acting ability.
Kick-Ass #2
With the morbid sense of humor Mark Millar puts on the page with “Kick Ass,” and his propensity for punishing Dave Lizewski at every turn for generally being a complete moron worthy of an early grave, I think this series will finally end with someone shooting Dave in the face and killing him in that stupid costume. And damn it if he doesn’t deserve every thing he gets for being such a brainless imbecile. Sorry, people but Millar’s writing sucks me in so much, I just want to call Dave a stupid whipper snapper and smack him with my cane. I want to kick his ass, as it were.
The Andromeda Strain (2008): Part One
If anyone knows me properly, then they know that I absolutely love post-apocalyptic fiction and it’s a wonder why I’ve never read Michael Crichton’s novel before. I guess I just never crossed paths with it. Although a bit gaudy at times, this new television mini series is packed with heavyweights both behind the camera and in front of them, and not a single person goes without serving some sort of memorable moment in the spotlight. Everyone is here, even Andre Braugher, the character actor who hardly ever appears in an ensemble without biting it before everyone. “The Andromeda Strain” is a bit familiar, but then Crichton only serves to explore our fear of space travel and the potential repercussions of discovering something alien. And unstoppable. What if we discovered alien bacteria that ravaged Earth? Would we even be able to stop it?
Ring of Death (2008)
“Death Warrant,” “Undisputed,” and “Enter the Dragon.” If you’ve seen those films then there’s a good chance you won’t need to see the oddly titled “Ring of Death” which is a simultaneous nod and derivation of the aforementioned with none of the charm of either of them. “Ring of Death” is a movie with every such potential to be a fun guy’s action film, and fails to be nothing more than a sub-par television movie with the illusion of edge embedded into its rather predictable story. The writers never really provide us with the slightest bit of originality, opting instead to rely on our familiarity with the action genre.
The Next Food Network Star: Season 4, Episode One
You’re allowed to call me a hypocrite, a phony, and a two face because: I saw the entire season three of “The Next Food Network Star.” And I watched it religiously. And I liked it. And voted for the finalists after that obnoxious Hispanic dude bowed out. Go ahead, chuck your insults at me. I’ll wait. I deserve, but damn I love the Food Network. And, in my defense, there was one contestant named Rory Schepisi who was hot as bloody hell, and lost out to a less talented and charismatic woman, but whaddya gonna do? No offense to Amy, of course. “The Next Food Network Star” season four now begins, and I’m hooked yet again. For those interested, yes, episode one begins with a bang a la artificial melodrama. Yes, I’m one of you now, the people I judge and look down on.
In Plain Sight
Ah yes, it’s another show on cable about a super woman who is really just a regular person when she’s with her family, or in her personal life. She mothers everyone, talks back to her superiors, and even has a “Moonlighting” relationship with her hunky partner. And on the outside, she’s a professional risking her life as a Witness Protection Officer relocating witnesses who, well, witness something corroborating, and must be relocated. She’s a not so nice person though, and prefers to act on her gut instead of follow procedure (you know how the song goes!), and this gets her into trouble. But I wasn’t too down on “In Plain Sight,” because while it’s better suited for Lifetime, Mary McCormack finally gets a good vehicle that allows us to see what her supporting performances over the years, haven’t.
The Walking Dead #49
For the last time, that’s not zombie Rick Carl is leading on the cover of “The Walking Dead #49.” If Rick was a zombie, he’d be chasing after Carl and trying to eat him, who cares how close he was to him as a human? Either way, Kirkman manages to stir up controversy and heavy debating yet again with this issue, but damn if it isn’t a good one. Kirkman has a lot of questions to answer, and I have a feeling he’s going to in 50, but for all the inherent excellence this issue has, it’s pretty much just filler.