X-Men 3: The Last Stand (2006)

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My antipathy and scathing skepticism at the fact that FOX would hire hack Brett Ratner to direct one of my favorite comic book franchises of all time hasn’t exactly been a secret for all this time. I hated the fact that Ratner was given resources to potentially destroy my beloved storyline, and I was not looking forward to this. Even with the fact that Ellen Page was cast, I didn’t find anything worth being impressed about with Ratner’s alterations of the series I loved. “X-Men: The Last Stand” is supposedly the “last” film in the X-Men franchise; of course all the fans know its complete bullshit. “The Last Stand” is the final film in the “X-Men” franchise like “The Final Chapter” was in the “Friday the 13th” franchise.

When the film’s director (who refers to himself in a third person) chooses to cut out my favorite character from continuity, and further marginalize my second favorite, you can understand why I’d be pensive and spiteful. Now as for whether I was wrong in my utter campaign to tear down “X3”… well, in some aspects I was. Frankly, “X-Men: The Last Stand” was not the terrible film I predicted it would be, in fact I’ll admit, Ratner didn’t create the new “Mortal Kombat: Annihilation” as I’d suspected. “X-Men: The Last Stand” continues the storyline from the first two films and if you haven’t seen them, you’ll be very lost. Interestingly enough, “The Last Stand” possesses the same mood and atmosphere as the first two. Ratner, often a ham in his films, thankfully doesn’t get too out of hand here using most of the same sets we saw in the first films, and there’s not much drastic altering in terms of character development and plot.

I was able to sit through most of the film without rolling my eyes, thus that’s an instant win. Ratner, also a fan boy, also wants to compensate for his bad press by giving the fan boys what they want. In doing so, he serves what most fans wanted. We finally get to see the danger room in all its glory, we’re finally introduced to powerful mutant antagonist Trask, we’re finally able to witness the Morlocks, and many of the side characters get their day in the sun, particularly Iceman who, with a strong performance by Shawn Ashmore, really becomes integral. But most of all, Ratner wins me over with one major positive: Ellen Page is cast as one of the more original X-men characters: Kitty Pryde. Page, a newcomer to the franchise, is able to deliver a rather sublime performance as the lonely but intelligent Pryde who uses her unusual power to benefit the team, and Page seems to be having fun in her part as the girl who inadvertently cuts into Rogue and Bobby’s romance.

I really enjoyed her standout performance, and I hope the director has enough sense to bring her back. As for the story, it’s rather thin, but what we’re able to get, Ratner has fun with. “The Last Stand” succeeds in giving rather interesting social commentary correlating mutant kind with homosexuality, and race. Mystique even prefers not to be called by her real name, which she refers to as her “Slave name”. And the plot of the government creating a cure for the mutant gene echoes many social themes in terms of issues concerning society, and I found it rather engrossing. One of the better additions to the team is Kelsey Grammar who gives a quaint performance as the educated, acerbic, and witty Beast. Grammar, who I was annoyed about in terms of casting, manages to fit the role very well, and I was amused by his portrayal. Meanwhile, most of the characters and plot lines are continued without much of a hitch, and we witness much more of the intellectual rivalry between Erik and Charles as they fight to bring the newly revived Jean (now the homicidal Phoenix) to their sides.

What further adds to the realism of the story were the age gaps, which I never had much of a gripe with. Colossus is still just a beginner, Iceman is still a teenager, and Pyro is still the hothead. Stanford continues his excellent portrayal of the most underrated characters in the X-men mythos, and he just—for lack of a better word—owns the character. Ratner also takes advantage of the incredible dichotomy between the ice and fire controlling mutants pitting them against each other like competing brothers. Ratner does, indeed, squeeze in many mutants, but various times he does it smoothly by putting them in the background, and bringing them to the foreground without much inconsistency, and I enjoyed watching them in action. “The Last Stand” is a fun third installment in the house that Singer built, and I was surprised. For the incredible climax alone, “The Last Stand” wins with me.

What kept “The Last Stand” from achieving any sort of excellence was the complete waste of characterization that could have sufficed with more time to the story. Phoenix is introduced only to do nothing but stand around for most of the film, Rogue is relegated to a whining passive aggressive baby who disappears from the beginning, Angel appears for a brief period of time only to re-appear in the climax for no reason and not be featured again, the Morlocks as a villainous team were completely mis-handled being portrayed as mustache twirling villains dressed like Prince wannabes, and Goths with tattoos for no clear reason, and he further pushes Wolverine into the spotlight; a major mistake considering he’s getting a spin-off.

Ratner could have used this opportunity to focus on other characters. Ratner once again shows how when compared to Singer, he just can’t add up. The short running time for “The Last Stand” at a little over 100 minutes shows Brett’s lack of storytelling need, and his desire to push aside important storytelling in exchange for balls to wall action. For any other film that would be okay, but this is “X-Men” a comic book that’s supposed to be rich in character development and subtext. Ratner apparently wants to get to the climax immediately, so the short run time reflects with a thin storyline. If the film would have been longer, we could have had a much smoother story, and much better characterization. The problem with the short runtime is that no one outside of comic fans will know these characters, and the short vague introductions just won’t garner interest. Here’s a guy who can turn into multiple men… enjoy!

That’s basically the extent of the character focus Ratner places on the characters here. It’s sloppy, it’s hackneyed, and it’s just up Ratner’s alley. Most bothersome though was the careless inconsistency that showed how sloppy this installment was compared to the prior. Whatever happened to Nightcrawler? So, Jean as a child can lift cars in an instant yet as an adult in the first “X-Men” she had trouble closing a door? Why would the army house a metal controlling mutant’s assistant in a metal truck? If Leech can suck a mutant’s power, how did Callisto sense his powers if he’s basically the referred to as the anti-mutant? Worst of all, Cameron Bright once again continues to play the same character he played in “Godsend”, “Ultraviolet”, “Birth” and so on.

It’s shocking how such a terrible actor keeps getting cushy roles for playing the same character, and he’s yet another martyr themed character. Team that up with basically average special effects which are a basic step down from the effects we saw in Singer’s films, and occasionally clunky dialogue, Ratner basically shows while he’s not trying to stand out, he really doesn’t match up with the previous. I was surprised by “X-Men: The Last Stand” I have to admit. While I didn’t get what I expected, the film is still rather filled with highs, and lows that only Ratner could have achieved. Ratner never manages to achieve the intelligence of the previous installments, but he knows how to get his point across, and though it’s not the best installment of the series, with many, many present flaws, it sure is a very entertaining film.