Once upon a time, when Hollywood still had a smattering of original ideas bouncing around its empty little head, there was something called THE ABC MOVIE OF THE WEEK. If you don’t know what that is, probably because you’re under the age of sixty, it was this loose anthology series comprised of Made-for-TV movies that ran from 1969 to 1975 on the ABC network. It wasn’t always thrillers and horror and sci-fi flicks, but it was often thrillers and horror and sci-fi flicks. Often enough where you could say that these movies had a loose spiritual connection to The Twilight Zone or Night Gallery. Probably the most famous film that came out of it was Duel, starring Dennis Weaver and directed by Steven Spielberg. That one, which I’m sure you’ve heard of, is an excellent tightly woven thriller and a masterclass in how to build tension. It’s in my top five favourite Spielberg films actually. So of course I won’t be reviewing that one. Instead, I’ll be reviewing KILLDOZER!
Now, I’d like to share some crazy bit of trivia about me. I can’t be absolutely 100% sure of what I’m about to say, but I think that this just may be the very first movie I ever saw in my entire life. Because watching it again today unlocked a lot of old fragmented memories. I recognize a lot of the film’s scenes, especially the spookier ones with the bulldozer. I also remember that my mother was carrying me in her arms the last time I was watching the film. So I must have been tiny. KILLDOZER! aired on February 2nd, 1974, and I’m fairly certain that I didn’t watch it afterwards. That means that the last time I saw it I wasn’t even one year old yet. Isn’t that wild?
SYNOPSIS
While a team of construction workers are building an airstrip for an oil company on a small island off the coast of Africa, one of their bulldozers becomes possessed by an ancient alien entity living inside a meteorite that crashed there thousands of years ago. The bulldozer, nay Killdozer, then goes on a murderous rampage.
THINGS I THOUGHT DURING THE MOVIE
Movies just don’t look like this anymore. Those rich deep Earth tones and vivid colours, with just a hint of grain and blur, scream THE SEVENTIES. I don’t care how “good” it looks to anyone else, Super High Definition will always feel like Tik Tok videos to me. This, on the other hand, feels like I’m watching a real movie.
I know this is going to sound crazy, but I sort of miss movies where you can barely see anything in scenes shot at night. Weren’t horror movies scarier that way? Today, night scenes are so clear that the audience and the characters might as well have infrared vision.
The film is convinced that weird space sounds on the soundtrack are scary, and I kind of agree with it to be honest. No one puts odd atonal bleep-bloops in their movies anymore.
The characters in the movie aren’t always smart and they don’t always make the best decisions, but they’re always adults about it. It’s kind refreshing to watch middle aged men act like middle aged men instead of angst-ridden forty year old teenagers.
A Caterpillar D9, like the Killdozer in the movie, weighs almost fifty tons and has a maximum forward speed of 7.3 mph. GUYS, I THINK I SEE A WAY OUT OF THIS! Why don’t you try running in the opposite direction that the bulldozer is going?
There’s a scene in this movie where, if it was edited a tiny bit differently, it would be something straight out of Austin Powers. One of the construction workers is trying to run off in a Jeep, but the Killdozer is coming verrrry slowly from about three thousand feet away. You can guess the rest, and it is as hilarious as you expect it to be.
WAS IT REALLY A BAD MOVIE?
No, it wasn’t bad, but it is kind of boring. It’s fun for a one time watch because it’s like taking a dip straight back into the warm sexy waters of what was swinging seventies era television, but after a few re-watches you notice that it’s a bit slow and clunky. I think that this was trying to emulate Duel, with a monstrous piece of machinery battling against men. The problem is that it has none of the tension, buildup, payoffs, or scares of Duel. Not to mention, with Duel you don’t know what to expect. With this movie it’s obvious exactly what’s going to happen. I mean, the story’s right there in the title. That said. I think this movie has a lot of charm and a lot of value in watching once, but once is enough. Consider this a mild recommendation. It’s an archaic form of entertainment. It’s a time capsule. It’s a dusty museum piece. Seek it out, have some fun experiencing it, then forget about the damn thing for the next fifty years like I did.
KILLDOZER! stars Clint Walker as Lloyd Kelly, Carl Betz as Dennis Holvig, Neville Brand as ‘Chub’ Foster, James Wainwright as Jules ‘Dutch’ Krasner, James A. Watson Jr. as Al Beltran, and Robert Urich as ‘Mack’ McCarthy. It was written by Herbert F. Solow, Theodore Sturgeon and Ed MacKillop based on the novella by Theodore Sturgeon, and it was directed by Jerry London.