The Village (2004)

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After lots of cryptic movie posters all over the walls in theaters, posters that showed two hands holding a letter, posters that wouldn’t tell a thing to the casual movie-goer, after cryptic television teasers, commercials that gave nothing away but still kept audiences shocked with its atmosphere induced images, and after a really cheesy really bad mock-documentary exploring the “The Buried Secrets of M. Night Shyamalan” which ended up being nothing than a promotional program , director M. Night Shyamalan has again kept audiences wondering, has kept the media guessing, and has kept critics talking.

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Ripper (2001)

Director John Eyres does manage to capture the appropriate mood for a film with a concept such as this. The set pieces range from grim, to bleak, to bright, to sometimes very sleek, plus he manages to take an old tired horror device: a dark and stormy forest and manages to make it a bit tense with some suspense clearly evident to the audience awaiting the identity of the killer. Jack the Ripper, the famous or infamous serial killer has been fodder for horror movies for decades, and as always is the case, every new movie attempts to put a different spin on the serial killer, attempts to turn and twist, and flip the serial killer into a new movie, but alas, there are very few movies that can take the most interesting serial killer of all time and turn him into a good film.

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My (Imaginary) Interview with Eli Roth

I often wonder what it would be like if Eli Roth and I actually decided to do an interview together. Sure, it may polarize anyone else from ever wanting to provide an interview for Cinema Crazed, but I’d be happy anyway, because I’d openly ask that ass clown questions that would not only put him on the spot, but make him sweat. Every movie review site has someone they dislike in Hollywood, and Eli Roth is that person for Cinema Crazed. He’s not only a smug asshole, but he’s also an untalented shit for brains whom people assume is great because he splashes blood in their faces.

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Salem’s Lot (2004)

Once again, the sorely running on empty creatively Hollywood remakes yet another classic, and there’s plenty more on the way. Sorely lacking in tension, suspense, and atmosphere we now see talented actor Rob Lowe as lead character Ben Mears, an author who returns to his home town of “Jerusalem’s Lot” with much scrutiny from his old friends who disagree with his writing. He has a horrid past in the town experiencing a horrifying incident in an abandoned house in the center of town which everyone always conveniently seems to see in clear view from their window.

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They (2002)

After psychology student Julia witnesses her friend’s suicide, she begins to notice the signs of an unholy entity stalking her. Now as rolling blackouts plague New York, she begins to be stalked by creatures that live in the shadows, “They”, now as her friends begin disappearing, she must search for a way to stop “They”, but are they real or figments of her mind and trauma? Continue reading →

House of 1,000 Corpses (2003)

HOUSE-OF-1000-CORPSES“House of a 1,000 Corpses” is a throwback and dedication to the old seventies horror films; a decade which is arguably the best decade to churn out some of the horror genre’s best. Zombie knows his material and uses it in this with the good ol’ tale of a group of teens who enter into the countryside to discover the land and end up getting more than they bargained for. This set up is tired and has been done to death, but do any of us really tired of watching teens get hacked, sliced, cut, tortured, tormented, stabbed, and tied? No! And that’s why I got such a kick out of this groovy horror homage.

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Dreamcatcher (2003)

dreamcather-movieWritten while King was recovering from his tragic accident in which he was hit by a car, “Dreamcatcher” follows many of the themes of his traumatic event, even featuring a main character being violently hit by a car in the middle of the road. It’s unfortunate for King, that “Dreamcatcher” is one of his many onscreen misses. “Dreamcatcher” is a formula gone horribly wrong with plot elements and a story so contrived that it’s hard to watch this while not thinking about other stuff this borrows from. Borrowing from John Carpenter’s variation of “The Thing”, four men go up to a cabin in the woods to meet after years of separation and must take on an alien entity that can possess bodies; and borrowing from “Invasion of the body snatchers”, many people are getting overtaken by an alien that uses spores to enter one’s body and take over them.

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