How do you ruin four of the most timeless, scariest, and three-dimensional horror characters in history? Well, if you’re Stephen Sommers you put them in a special effects-laden piece of trash like this, and then make like a politician and cop -out insisting you’re a fan of these monsters, just to cover your bases and prevent criticism for directing and overseeing this chunk of cinematic sacrilege. The best about the opening of “Van Helsing” in theaters, you ask? Their releases of Universal’s monster classics in boxed sets. Maybe it was sub-conscious guilt on part of Universal for ruining their characters. Van Helsing, my favorite literary hero of all time is resurrected for the hundredth time around ala Bruckheimer motif in this franchise wannabe called “Van Helsing”.
Tag Archives: Horror
Hellboy (2004)
Prolific director Guillermo Del Toro who penned the previous comic film “Blade 2” and the cult psychological horror film “The Devil’s Backbone” gives some competent direction in this adaptation of the hit comic book. A young agent John T. Meyers is recruited into the ranks of Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defense Facility, he’s signed on to mentor their primary weapon of choice. Given a tour of the facilities gazing on to Abe Sapien a very intelligent reptilian sea creature, he’s assigned to take care of Hellboy. Discovered as a child during World War 2 during a raid on the Nazis, he was summoned to Earth to become the evil Rasputin’s child and eventual ruler of Earth, but when US soldiers discovered him, professor Broom took him in to reform him and he became Earth’s greatest protector using his powers for evil to protect humanity.
Scary Movie 3
Once rumored to have Kevin Smith on board as screenwriter and helmer of the franchise, we have now embarked on “Scary Movie 3.” Now directed by David Zucker, a professional, the man behind “Airplane!,” he directs this time taking the place of the Wayans brothers, and boy am I thankful for the change. If part two and their plans for part three were any indicator, the Wayans ran out of material for spoofing, and the change is most welcome. Now spoofing films like “8 mile”, alien fare “Signs” which the plot revolves around, pop culture phenomenon like “American Idol”, horror films like “The Others”, “The Ring”, and mega blockbusters like “The Matrix”, “Scary Movie 3” has a more fresh new feeling this time around, it has almost a sense of professionalism the Wayans had a hard time instilling.
Ju-on (2002)
“Ju-On” is a sheer test of terror, tension, and heightening suspense, and director Takashi Shimizu who also writes the script gives some inspiring direction that echoes Hitchcock’s directing style of silence and horror within everyday aspects. Though the haunted house movie has been done as far back as movies have been around, Shimizu does one hell of a job with the formula creating not a movie with ghosts, but demons. Starting off with a gritty and frightening sequence in which a man murders a woman, her cat, and proceeds to make his way up to a young boy, and we skip to present day where we watch victim after victim fall under the unrelenting spell of the demonic entities that live in the house.
Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust (2000)
I loved the original “Vampire Hunter D,” I remember watching it for the first time with my jaw hanging down, drool and some snot hanging down. So, I was obviously excited to see this, and after I popped this bad boy into my DVD player, I was not disappointed. I was weary about the new design for Vampire Hunter D at first, I wasn’t sure what was wrong with the original design, but he looks so much better here. With a design that Universal ripped off in 2004’s “Van Helsing” he’s just so stylish here with a beautiful costume that not only acts as a shroud but protection from the sunlight and they make his vampiric appearance better here with a white pale face and just a cold exterior that makes him such a great character to watch.
Shaun of the Dead (2004)
If you were to ask me right now which I prefer, British comedy or American comedy, I’d reply without a moment’s hesitation: British comedy. Uh-oh someone’s being unpatriotic! Think about it: they gave us “Monty Python”, “The Office”, “Coupling”, and inspiration for “All in the Family” and “Three’s Company” (and so much more), I love all British comedy because it’s just so utterly brilliant. Regardless, the British have comedy down to a tee, down to an art and theirs is subtle, so sharp and so unbelievably funny and sometimes weird, case in point: Shaun of the Dead. It’s quite obvious when watching this film that creators Simon Pegg and Edgar Wright are not only pop culture buffs, but also horror buffs as they pay homage to the great George Romero with every aspect of a good zombie film, and yes there’s walking zombies, no runners here.
King of the Ants (2003)
Director Stuart Gordon, the man who brought us the cult classic “Re-Animator” tells the tale of revenge in this low budget thriller about a young man named Sean Crawley, an out of work struggling man with no clue to his purpose or what he’s doing but takes any job he can get. After meeting a man named Duke in one of his jobs, Duke (George Wendt: Cheers) makes him a job offer. The details he gives him are vague and he seems to dance around what the job entails, but desperate, Sean agrees to meet with Duke’s boss Ray (Daniel Baldwin) a cocky self-assured rich man who tells Sean he wants a rival of his (Ron Livingston in a walk on role) followed. Sean agrees to tail his rival and proceeds to do so for a number of days until he’s approached by Ray to kill him and eliminate him as competition.