Sharktopus vs. Whalewolf (2015)

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I bet you’re wondering the same thing. In order for a whalewolf to come to life should a werewolf bite a whale, or would a whale bite a werewolf? If a whale bit a human would it become a werewhale? Hey, the logic I’m posing is just as silly as the logic in “Sharktopus vs. Whalewolf,” a movie that’s much more fun than it has any right to be. Right off the bat, the thing to remember is the movie doesn’t take itself seriously at all. This is about a movie where a sharktopus are murdering people left and right and our main heroes aren’t all that emotionally distraught after the fact.

This time around Casper Van Dien plays sea captain Ray, who is hosting a funeral aboard his ship. When the widow falls over, the sharktopus has her for lunch. He’s jailed for manslaughter, despite his insistence sharktopus did it. Now he has to prove Sharktopus exists, along with his ex-girlfriend Nita (the gorgeous Nakari Endo), who also witnesses a massacre by Sharktopus. Just their luck a local scientist is specializing in gene splicing with various animals’ DNA, and is experimenting on a local baseball player who wants to improve his game. When her experiment kills him, he rises from the dead and re-emerges as Whalewolf. Because that’s how stuff works!

Now Whalewolf and Sharktopus are running rampant through the Dominican Republic and it’s up to Ray and Nita to put a stop to their havoc, or else others might suffer deaths that will go generally unnoticed. Also Ray has to catch the heart of Sharktopus for a local voodoo priest for the sake of rituals. “Sharktopus vs. Whalewolf” wears its intentions on its sleeves with silly comedy, shifty special effects, and a plot that’s built around the inevitable clashing between these monster hybrids. For all intents and purposes we do get to see these monsters fight at least once or twice, and it’s entertaining depending on how much you want to see Sharktopus battle Whalewolf. All in all, the performances are spirited, the comedy is slapstick, and “Sharktopus vs. Whalewolf” scratches at the itch for a creature feature with two juggernauts going at each other’s throats. I won’t say it’s a masterpiece, but it’s guilty fun.

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