“Pick me Up” prides itself in being both morbid and pleasingly twisted. As if the concept of open roads and total strangers wasn’t uneasy enough, the fact that the writer pinpoints that there can also be psychotic truckers and psychotic hitchhikers works with a great effect. The ego war between both Walker and Wheeler is fascinating to watch as they have almost a competition killing people they come across and taking immense interest in their methods. And then there’s Fairuza Balk. Normally, I’m not one who thinks she’s sexy, but surprisingly, here, watching her walk around in a towel was sexy. She’s unnecessary, but she’s good here.
Category Archives: TV Tomb
Masters of Horror: Fair Haired Child
A young unpopular girl from Connecticut named Tara is run over one day after school and awakes to find herself being held hostage by a couple. She’s thrown in to their basement and discovers a young boy hanging from a rope. She saves him and now the two hostages must find a way to get out of the basement before the monster awakens and eats them both. I’m not a fan of Petty basically because she always plays the same character in every movie, but here she’s really good and provides a truly creepy performance as the menacing Judith who seeks to keep Tara locked up as long as it takes. Petty is at her most threatening looking like a vampiric Kathy Bates running the show and waiting for Tara to be killed. “Fair Haired Child” is a dread-filled installment with true suspense and mystery and the eventual surprise of what lies in the basement without her knowledge.
Masters of Horror: Sick Girl
Of all the episodes from the “Masters of Horror” series, this was the one I was really looking forward to because: a) It’s Lucky McKee, how cool a name is that? b) It’s described as “The Fly” with lesbians, and c) It has Misty Mundae in it. Yeah, so what I’m a fan of her. “Playmate of the Apes” (Making out with a pink ape? Priceless) and “Lord of the G-Strings” is quality shit, with some brutally funny performances. “Sick Girl” is a freaky, campy, and utterly clever jab at lesbianism in America, but also a good retread on “The Fly”. I don’t know why, but I assumed “Sick Girl” would be played to a more dramatic effect, but then it’s Lucky McKee, this guy likes to play on odd.
Campus Ladies
To get in the mind set of “Campus Ladies”, you’ll have to imagine a really bad sketch from “Saturday Night Live” and then imagine that instead of it being a five minute sketch, it’s extended in to a half hour show, and that half hour will now be a series. Now granted, I was never a fan of “Oxygen” and its programming, I approached “Campus Ladies” with a very open-mind, and then after I was finished with it, I wanted to jam my fingers in to my eyes until I reached my brain and then spin. “Campus Ladies” is possibly one of the most unfunny, and utterly irritating comedies I’ve ever seen that tries so hard to resemble a BBC comedy, it’s not even funny.
Masters of Horror: Cigarette Burns
I’ve never understood while watching this entry why anyone would want a film that makes people go violent, and a good film no less. I mean I’ve seen bad films that made me go violent–watch “Gigli” or “Battlefield Earth” and you’ll want to murder someone–but a good film? I don’t know. Either way, that’s the concern for John “As long as I get paid” Carpenter’s entry called “Cigarette Burns”. Norman Reedus plays Kirby, a film aficionado who has been sent by a millionaire (Udo Kier) to search for the infamous film “Le Fin Du Monde”, a film that made a reputation of itself after the first screening caused its audience to riot violently.
Masters of Horror: Deer Woman
Don’t you hate it when Native American legends about man killing seductresses come true? I know I sure do. Director John Landis’ tale conquers that common American problem with a unabashedly cheesy, but still entertaining entry in to the “Masters of Horror” series that never takes itself seriously. As basically all of these stories, there’s a woman on the road killing travelers, truckers and any horny man that comes on to her, and these guys fall for her hook line and sinker. It’s not hard to buy the fact that these men fall for this female’s tricks since the actress Cinthia Moura is utterly hot, but it’s a wonder if these guys ever saw a noir film learning about femme fatales.
Masters of Horror: Dance of the Dead
Richard Matheson’s short story does get a very kinetic bit of treatment by Hooper’s often surreal direction here. The world in “Dance of the Dead” is a world where even death isn’t the end, and even the bodies of the once living are used as entertainment in a world run by teenagers who do nothing but get high and wreak havoc on the world. Robert Englund has an especially serpentine-like walk-on role as a wicked DJ who runs the show from behind the scenes and seeks personal finance by the misery of others. “Dance of the Dead” can tend to be a twisted and gruesome look at the post-apocalypse world. It’s pretty hard to think of a very good Hooper production after “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” and “Poltergeist”, because I’d say Hooper really hasn’t scored a slam dunk in a good long while.