Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005)

Posted on December 12, 2005 by Felix Vasquez

Believe it or not, I was hopeful for the remake of “Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory”. While I was never a fan of Tim Burton (I’ve always considered him over rated), I was hoping Burton’s take on the story would be entertaining and very amusing, but alas, Burton botches yet another remake. For those whom may not remember, Burton completely botched the remake of “Planet of the Apes” which went from a thought provoking allegory about society to a dumbed down teen science fiction film. Now, granted, I did give it a good review, it was based mostly on the cast and make up.

Either way, don’t believe the excuses of the hardcore Burton fan boys, this is a remake in every sense of the word, but Burton goes in the hall of fame of directors whom just couldn’t top the original masterpiece.

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Spanglish (2004)

Posted on November 19, 2005 by Felix Vasquez

When you really recollect what you’ve just seen, when the credits start to roll and you’re settled in and thinking back with a fond remembrance, you know that “Spanglish” isn’t an exceptional movie. As a comedy the laughs are minimal. It’s more of an absurdist comedy than a laugh out loud comedy, as a drama it can be manipulative, and altogether it’s just mediocre. Now, I for one, dislike anything that’s praised as brilliant when the product is mediocre (Harry Potter), but what sold me on “Spanglish” was not the story, but the performances, and the key powerful performances are not from the people who obtain top billing.

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Fat Albert (2004)

Posted on November 2, 2005 by Felix Vasquez

I used to love “Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids”. As a child I spent many days watching the Cosby Kids from their junkyard solve problems while bringing us along for the fun that ensued. It was really no surprise to me when I discovered that the adaptation was being filmed, especially with the successes of popular shows being processed in to bad movies like “Scooby-Doo”, and “Rocky and Bullwinkle”. Very few were hits, and many were utter misses, because instead of giving us a truly good story that works, they were just made to cash in on the popularity and take our money. Luckily, I never paid for any of them. “Fat Albert”–though not as awful as claimed repeatedly–is still a terrible film and was a bit of a match to sit through.

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Shark Tale (2004)

Posted on September 14, 2005 by Felix Vasquez

I’m as to Will Smith’s real appeal these days. Every role he’s in, he basically plays himself, and in “Shark Tale”, Will Smith plays Will Smith… as a fish; How incredibly original. Oscar, his character is very superficial. He has no real redeeming qualities, is more based on his personality than actually making him a three-dimensional character with traits, and never really convinces me that I should like him, and I ended up liking Lenny (Jack Black) much more. Every other character is just there to pop jokes in now and again.

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Pilots Reviews: CBS' "How I Met Your Mother," UPN's "Everybody Hates Chris"

Posted on September 12, 2005 by Felix Vasquez

So what the hell do both of these shows have to do with each other? Well, simply put: they flash back to a time that would lead to something big eventually, and both could either deliver to the audience what we want, or can drag on and on and on until the gimmicks are so tired, we beg for it to be cancelled. But surprisingly, one gimmick works better than the other. Sometimes flashback shows work (“Wonder Years”, My Beloved “American Dreams”), and sometimes they don’t (“Do Over”, “That Was Then”), and both shows rely on this gimmick to spawn an entire series. With “How I Met Your Mother”, we see an old man telling his two children how he met their mom, and it’s safe to say this show has a big gimmick that will only tell how long this show will last. I mean how long will these kids sit to listen to this story? More importantly how long will the audience?

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Whale Rider (2002)

Posted on August 4, 2005 by Felix Vasquez

This is what a children’s film should be, uplifting, encouraging, and a beautiful film about family and empowerment. This is what children’s films should be like. True realistic portraits with engaging characters and an uplifting message. The film has themes children will connect with such as seeking approval from parents, attempting to prove yourself as an adult, being raised and pressured to carry on their traditions, living up to your sibling, and basically journeying to come of age, while we can relate to the characters here. The characters are human, not broadly sketched, and each are so utterly esoteric and revealing beneath their layers and personalities that we anxiously watch to see what will become of Director Caro’s vision that, even adults may find themselves engrossed.

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Finding Neverland (2004)

Posted on July 25, 2005 by Felix Vasquez

I love the story of Peter Pan, I love the legend and myth, I love the allegory Peter Pan represents, and I love the peanut butter. Peter Pan was always my favorite story as a child simply because it was a young boy who could fly and fight, fighting a man twice his size who had a hook for a hand, it was great! But on the other hand, Pan was a deeper symbol for childhood and having to grow up and let go of childish things.

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