Our Cinematic Favorites of the 80's!

I’m in the minority opinion that about most of what came out of the eighties was utter dreck. Movies, music, fashion, and television, a good portion of it is dreck that has remained in the public consciousness based solely around nostalgia and people still muddled by their own fond memories of the decade. Since I’m in an eighties mood I thought I’d finally settle our top ten movies of the 80’s, a decade that gave us mind rotting MTV, and Mr. T only to name a few of its crimes, of course. Rounding out our top ten of the decade was not an easy task since it was a decade consisting primarily of disposable fare in the way of comedies and horror films, while the dramas were basically mostly middling fare.

I was, however, up to the challenge. I did set some guidelines of course. Since the 80’s were all about the slasher film, about every slasher film made in the decade is off the table since this list would be filled with them and ruin the purpose. I’m a heavy fan of the “Friday the 13th” series and the like, so it wouldn’t be an interesting list. We also left out most of the Nightmare on Elm Street films, Critters, Gremlins, and most horror films from the decade altogether. We give enough respect to them, here are ten films from the ten years that I thought were the absolute best.

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Bridesmaids (2011)

398208It’s quite rare that in today’s movie market you’ll find a film that appeals to the male and female demographic so vehemently, but “Bridesmaids” manages to accomplish being a film for the men and the women simultaneously. And it took an SNL alum to conquer such an impossible feat. Possibly the funniest movie all year, “Bridesmaids” is that coming of age romance dramedy that never takes itself seriously, but knows when its time to act like an adult. And that’s due to Kristen Wiig’s ability to play the most unlikely movie heroine you can imagine.

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Unknown (2011) [DVD/Blu-Ray/Digital]

unknown-quadThe key to a great mystery is the lead in, the ultimate catch and macguffin that will bring us in to the cusp of a surprise. “Unknown” has the surprise, there’s no doubting that, it’s jut the problem that the lead in provides that makes it an entirely mediocre piece of thriller that’s almost about a nonsensical as you can imagine. The writers literally write themselves in to conundrums throughout the movie as plot points go unexplained, only for them to completely undermine their previous direction, and you can sense them almost trying not to destroy the narrative from minute one.

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Super 8 (2011)

Super-8-2011-poster-horizontalYou can feel the youth of Steven Spielberg and JJ Abrams permeating through every film cell of “Super 8.” The 2011 movie veiled in mystery has become one of the most highly regarded films that isn’t directed by Spielberg but very well may have been. From familial discord, the death of a parent, and the like “Super 8” channels these themes from classic Spielberg fare like “Close Encounters,” and “Jaws” with a sprinkle of “Stand By Me” and “The Goonies” for good measure. We follow a group of children tasked with uncovering a mystery their adult counterparts couldn’t possibly fathom, a menace that promises to destroy the world. Or at least destroy their lives for good.

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Passion Play (2011)

passion-playDirector Mitch Glazer’s film is probably one of the funniest most pretentious art house flicks of the year. It’s one of the stupidest pieces of utter tripe ever conceived by man, an almost satirical look at artsy fartsy that dabbles in to a premise so ridiculous it’s barely competent enough be considered symbolic. Oh Megan Fox is a bird girl named Lily, but she doesn’t want to be a bird girl, but she’s so beautiful! Mickey Rourke wants to restore her beauty by keeping her wings in tact even though she destroys them every night, all the while confronting wandering Indians who come to his rescue, evil old carnies and the like, all of whom are obviously some form of delusions of grandeur by some coked up cowboy played by Rourke who stumbles through the film with a grumble.

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Thor (2011)

BovkDTVMarvel’s Thor has always skidded on the edge of mainstream entertainment and literary fare. As a comic book series it’s always been one of the most sophisticated of the pantheon of characters, so not every fan has subscribed to what tale the god of thunder has told fans for decades. And even with big names leading the pack like Natalie Portman and Kenneth Branagh, “Thor” is a hard sell for fans of the superhero cinema who want their entertainment and battles here and now and have to wait for their meals.

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Stake Land (2011)

stakeland2011“Stake Land” is that type of movie that many indie film fans will take a liking to, primarily since every frame glitters with a Sundance gloss that make it suitable for the independent niche that’s become so popular in 2011. Which is not at all a criticism, but the film often feels like it’s appealing mainly to the indie buffs before the horror fans and that may alienate movie geeks to some degree. “Stake Land” from Jim Mickle is yet another post apocalyptic nightmare from Hollywood that ponders on the question: What if vampires took over the world? Mickle paints this world in such a gritty disgusting zeal with blood soaked carnage and raving maniacal vampires, that it often feels like a sequel to “30 Days of Night.”

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