You know how I know “Spiders” is set in New York and not in a cleverly shot in a studio with the same set pieces re-used over and over again? Becawse Patrick Muldoon tawks like dis tru most of da movie. Youse guys and yaw clichés about New Yawkers! Hey, I’m walkin here! It sounds like I made a bad funny, but a character actually shouts that a half hour in to the movie. Because it’s not Canada if you don’t say “eh,” and it’s not New York if you don’t pay homage to Ratzo Rizzo.
Tag Archives: Thriller
Hypothermia (2010)
This is almost like “The Creature from the Black Lagoon” if conceived by Jim Jarmusch and directed by Larry Fessenden. The film attempts to put up a pretence that it’s saving the monster shots for the big finale, but in reality you can almost feel the director concealing the monster for the fact that it’s not a very menacing creature, when all is said and done.
God Bless America (2011)
My reaction to “God Bless America” came in three waves. 1. Wait, Bobcat Goldthwait makes films? 2. Wait, Bobcat Goldthwait makes great films? 3. Wait–Bobcat Goldthwait directed one of my favorite films of 2012?! Hot damn. “God Bless America” is one of the most vicious reflections of American pop culture I’ve ever seen. It’s a relentless, tasteless and violent look at one man’s response to the dying culture of America, and how we’ve so embraced idiocy and tailored rudeness in to a positive trait that it becomes only logical to snuff out those who impact it.
The Devil Inside (2012)
Tell me if this exchange sounds idiotic to you:
“I think I might have AIDS someday, doctor.”
“We may never know. I know one solution.”
“What is that?”
“Let’s give you AIDS and see if you have it.”
“I’m in!”
So if a girl is afraid she may be possessed one day like her mother, why on Earth do you bring her along on a dangerous possession ritual that may take the lives of all involved? What does that even prove? “But Felix, we wouldn’t have a movie if she didn’t go along.” Then why even call this a found footage film? Why not just stage it as a feature film?
Hansel & Gretel (2013)
The rationale behind the villain Lilith in “Hansel and Gretel” makes no sense. She traps Hansel and Gretel in a bear trap and lures them to her house, she feeds Hansel a meat pie, and traps him in her basement to make him in to her pie, and then asks Gretel to take control of the shop and run it for her, in spite of the fact she’s about to turn her brother in to a meat pastry. She then gets angry when Gretel refuses? Turning her relative in to food is not exactly incentive for her to stay and help you in the shop. And did she continue to intend turning kids in to meat pies if Gretel took hold of the shop?
The Dark Knight Trilogy: Limited Edition Gift Set [Blu-Ray]
After wallowing for almost two decades in movie limbo thanks to the horrific failure of “Batman & Robin,” it took Warner Bros. hiring of independent filmmaker Christopher Nolan to finall bring Batman out of the whimsy of the nineties and transform him in to a relevant cinematic hero once more. Christopher Nolan, always a man intent on bringing his own ideas to the forefront and never crushing under pressure, decided to basically play the trilogy of Batman movies on his own terms and delivered three of the most quintessential Batman movies ever made. Christopner Nolan’s “The Dark Knight” trilogy presents the quintessential cinematic Batman that would come to influence a slew of comic book based films that strived for realism and an adult attitude toward the source material.
The Aggression Scale (2012)
Director Steven C. Miller is quickly becoming one of my favorite genre directors of late. Premiering with the solid zombie film “Automaton Transfusion,” his films seem to have a grit and guerilla style that often add a sense of urgency. His treatment of “Silent Night” skirted the edges of camp and slasher, while his latest “The Aggression Scale” is a definite step up. Though the film can sometimes show its low budget, director Miller makes great use of marvelous editing along with limited scenery to create an intense and absolutely excellent home invasion thriller.