I’ve never seen a movie so apparently short on a script that it purposely pads the run time to compensate. I’ve seen movies waste time on screen, but director Virgil W. Vogel’s science fiction adventure obviously had a script comprised of maybe forty pages of actual narrative and writing. The rest of the seventy seven minutes is obvious empty filler, and padding that tries to run out the clock for the sake of the feature length credibility. Set in the general vicinity of Asia, we meet (two of the most grating heroes ever put to film) archaeologists Dr. Roger Bentley and Dr. Jud Bellamin, both of whom are dedicated to finding a mythical race of Sumerian Albinos living deep in the Earth.
Category Archives: Movie Reviews
Lunch Ladies (2017) [Women in Horror Month 2019]
Two lunch ladies lose it a bit and feed their high school students something a touch different while day-dreaming of cooking for their beloved Johnny Depp.
Written by Clarissa Jacobson and directed by J.M. Logan, Lunch Ladies is a horror-comedy short that packs a punch. It’s one of those that is easily watched and for which is humor works and so does the gross-out factor. Together, these two create a fun short that more than worth its runtime and that allows the viewer a bit of a break from the usual when they fully give in to what Seretta and LouAnne have to offer. The film is kept tight and moving with just the right amount of everything, creating the perfect balance between everything going on in the film.
Starman (1984): Collector’s Edition [Blu-Ray]
You have to give it to John Carpenter. Even when he stumbles, he’s still one of the finest directors around who manages to set himself apart from his contemporaries stylistically. While “Star Man” is an obvious attempt to cash in on the good Spielberg “ET” dough, “Star Man” manages to be a pretty okay movie, either way. Carpenter sets aside his usual nihilism in favor of a more measured alien love story where it retains much of its appeal thanks to the wonderful turns by Karen Allen and Jeff Bridges. This is especially a movie where Allen shines, as she delivers a performance filled with layers and emotion to the very end.
Blood Runs Down (2017) [Final Girls Berlin Film Festival]
“Flesh and Blood” Shorts Block
Director Zandashé Brown’s Southern Gothic horror short is a beautifully directed narrative that explores the complex and sometimes darker relationships of mothers and daughters and the stresses of raising a child on one’s own. “Blood Runs Down” has some wonderful imagery and genuinely unsettling moments of terror it’s just mired by ambiguity that makes the overall film somewhat confusing.
Supine (2018) [Final Girls Berlin Film Festival]
“Tainted Love” Shorts Block
I could kind of see where “Supine” was headed thanks to the opening shots, but Nicole Goode’s short horror drama still managed to register as a demented peek inside of a complete and utter monster. Eva Larvoire does a bang up job playing Sylvie, a taxidermist living in France, who spends most of her time looking for dead animals on the road.
¿Quieres Que Hoy Te Bese? (Do You Want Me to Kiss You This Time?) (2018) [Final Girls Berlin Film Festival]
“Growing Pains” Shorts Block
Directors Iker Arce and Miriam Ortega Dominguez’s “¿Quieres Que Hoy Te Bese?” is a nearly half hour short film that resonated deeply with me when it was all over. What we assume is a short horror drama about a teenage girl coming in to adulthood in the most sinister fashion, we soon discover is a very brilliantly constructed, disturbing non-linear horror tale.
St. Agatha (2018)
A young woman seeks shelter from a convent after getting pregnant, hoping to find caring help and understanding souls, but finding anything but in the house.