Tag Archives: Horror

Masters of Horror: Sick Girl

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Of all the episodes from the “Masters of Horror” series, this was the one I was really looking forward to because: a) It’s Lucky McKee, how cool a name is that? b) It’s described as “The Fly” with lesbians, and c) It has Misty Mundae in it. Yeah, so what I’m a fan of her. “Playmate of the Apes” (Making out with a pink ape? Priceless) and “Lord of the G-Strings” is quality shit, with some brutally funny performances. “Sick Girl” is a freaky, campy, and utterly clever jab at lesbianism in America, but also a good retread on “The Fly”. I don’t know why, but I assumed “Sick Girl” would be played to a more dramatic effect, but then it’s Lucky McKee, this guy likes to play on odd.

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Hostel (2005)

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Hostel_01_1024“Hi! I’m Eli Roth, I’m that film school reject people like Quentem Tarantino and Takaki Miike are saying is a genius! I make moving pictures, moving pictures that really suck, but see people don’t know that, because I just pass it off as art, and then my mentor pats my head, critics praise me, complacent horror fans worship me, and I disappear in to my house.” There were two movies that came out in 2005, two similar attempted nihilistic horror entries that were both very gory, very unique, and made at the displeasure of the MPAA, and both struck chords with horror fans. Except this one.

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Venom (2005)

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venom-2005-dvdKnow this film? You probably don’t. As a matter of fact, not a lot of people really know what exactly “Venom” is and that it had a very short run in theaters. And bombed in spite of its good cast and Kevin Williamson helping to fuel the film. Once called “Backwater”, then called “The Reaper”, and now “Venom”, I was pleasantly surprised that it wasn’t as bad as I’d heard. It’s no masterpiece, but hey, it beats “House of Wax” by a couple of inches.

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Bram Stoker's Way of the Vampire (2005)

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wotvVampire movies are perhaps the easiest of the horror genre to make aside from zombie films. Some fake fangs, contacts, immense over acting and voila (watch the actors here attempt to mutter their lines through fake teeth!). You can go to an online store and simply type in “vampire” and you’ll come up with about seventy to a hundred vampire films. What’s rare about vampire films though, is that it’s extremely difficult to find a vampire movie that’s actually worth watching. I can think of only a few. “Bram Stoker’s The Way of the Vampire” is no exception to this rule.

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Shallow Ground (2004)

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w1qk4pSo, a young naked boy covered in blood emerges from the woods and stumbles upon a sheriff’s office. No, this isn’t the start of a potentially funny riddle, but the opening of the lackluster and misfired “Shallow Ground” a film that though graced with an original concept, is completely botched from beginning to end. “Shallow Ground” consists of a very loud and irritating score that basically follows wooden acting, forgettable performances, and interchangeable characters I knew nothing about, and had no interest in knowing. At first, the set-up for “Shallow Ground” resembles basically any other horror film, but writer-director Sheldon Wilson attempts to become more esoteric and lays out the ground work for a more meaningful horror flick that tries too hard.

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Wolf Creek (2005)

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wolf_creek_ver2“Based on True Events” does not mean “This is exactly what happened”, folks. “Based on True Events” means this is what happened in our eyes. Now, I bet you’re surprised that this hardcore horror fan, the one who loved an equally brutal horror film known as “Haute Tension” gave “Wolf Creek” such a low “undeserving” rating, eh? Well, trust me when I tell you this, I was disappointed myself. I’m crushed. But you’re saying “How the hell can you like Haute Tension and not like this?!” Well, firstly, what director and writer McLean does most of all is give us a ho-hum run of the mill slasher film that in every sense failed to impress me.

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Ringu (Ring) (1998)

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japanring4Hideo Nakata influenced many a people, from the directors in Asia whom created all sorts of ghost films deriving from “Ringu’s” element with ghosts that are able to come in to our world through electronic devices, to what’s become the norm for Japanese ghosts: the pale girl with long damp black hair. I’m not as big a fan as others when it comes to Japanese horror, but I appreciate half of what we’re introduced to, and “Ringu” is one of those films I appreciate. I just had to see this, basically since I ended up really liking the remake, “The Ring”. Yes, I’m one of those few who enjoyed it. Either way, Nakata’s direction is something that I found to be the most impressive aspect of “Ringu” because the man knows how to mount tension and then alleviate it with a stunning shot to the arm that works.

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