Have we reached so low down the totem pole that we’re now ripping off Eli Roth movies? Is that the definition of desperation or what? “Aftershock” feels like one of those situations with “Poltergeist” where Eli Roth was ghost directing while Nicolas Lopez was credited as director. It’s a half hour of a lame tourist dramedy, followed by an hour of really silly gore and zero direction in its story, all leading in to a finale that shamelessly rips off the final scenes of “The Descent.” Thank goodness “Aftershock” is a merciful ninety minutes.
Tag Archives: Survival
The Call (2013)
Director Brad Anderson’s thriller “The Call” is entertaining and unique only thanks to its ludicrous premise, and abundantly stupid characters. While the first half of the film presents glimmers promise with great tension, and taut atmosphere, it falters mid-way and never comes back from the depths of idiocy. Halle Berry is an experienced 911 operator who is tasked with helping a young girl who is being terrorized by a burglar, breaking in to her house. When the burglar kidnaps her, and the young girl is discovered in a shallow grave days later Jordan is traumatized and leaves her job. She blames herself for the girl’s murder. And for good reason. If you advise a victim to hide under the bed and keep quiet, then the phone is accidentally disconnected, why in the hell would you call them back knowing they’re still hiding and risk giving away their location?
Night Of The Comet: Collector’s Edition (1984) [BluRay/DVD]
Director Thom Eberhardt’s eighties apocalyptic classic is a great amalgam of zombie horror and coming of age drama. And while it does watch very much like an eighties film with brutally dated clothing and hairstyles, Eberhardt’s film has been incredibly influential since its initial release, nonetheless. Scream Factory provides a fitting and really sharp treatment (though maintaining the grit and grain) for what is still a stellar dose of post-apocalyptic fiction that entertains as well as frightens.
The Bourne Legacy (2012)
I wouldn’t say that “The Bourne Legacy” is a bad movie. As a sequel, or spin off, it works as an interesting diversion, and has a unique concept. Treadstone perhaps wasn’t the only test subject, and now we’re faced with the potential of others out there fighting for their lives when the government decides to burn the entire house down and murder their subjects. Jeremy Renner has proven to be a charismatic action hero, and “The Bourne Legacy” is altogether a fine movie, in the end. And that’s the problem. It’s just fine. The first three “Bourne” movies were incredible.
The Starving Games (2013)
Friedberg and Seltzer’s “The Starving Games,” because we haven’t seen enough fucking jokes about “the most interesting man in the world”! The only advantage to watching “The Starving Games” (beyond Maiara Walsh) is that the Beavis and Butthead of comedy film making seem to be operating on a lower budget, thus the piss poor effects perfectly reflect the utterly piss poor comedy.
Stalled (2013)
Director Christian James’ “Stalled” is a very creative, and often clever horror comedy that takes the zombie movie to a new direction. It tries, at least. “Stalled” really seems to have a grasp on its premise for the first forty minutes, and then scrambles to keep monotony from setting in the rest of the way. In spite of that, “Stalled” is a creepy, interesting, and very unique zombie horror comedy that takes a few notes from “Shaun of the Dead.” It’s a horror movie about a perpetual loser who gets his life together in the wake of a bona fide zombie apocalypse. But it tries to add its own twists to the conventions, which make for a good experience.
Juan of the Dead (2011)
“Juan of the Dead” is a silly and occasionally creepy zombie movie, but one that also dares to have a brain and display some very volatile commentary about the state of Cuba, and the inherent poverty that runs rampant. Though Juan lives in poverty and is mostly considered a loser by most in his neighborhood, he’s managed to carve out a comfortable existence for himself, and is something of a saving grace for neighbors. After Juan and his friend Lazaro come across a rotted corpse while fishing that attempts to bite them, they kill it and then decide never to talk about it again. What’s funny is that most of the situations may seem like a warning sign to most, but director Brugués comments on the state of Cuba through it.







