How do you ruin potential for a great adaptation of the cult franchise “Wing Commander” in one fell swoop? You cast Freddie Prinze Jr. of course! The leading man with the charisma and talent of a mop stick leads the charge in this science fiction adaptation of the hit video game series, while Matthew Lillard is his spaz sidekick who screeches like a coked up C3P0 during battle, in spite of the fact that we’re told these are experienced soldiers.
Monthly Archives: June 2013
Man of Steel (2013)
Much in the way Bryan Singer practiced with “Superman Returns,” director Zack Snyder displays amazing restraint and subtlety with his version of Superman. Which is surprising considering Zack Snyder is hardly ever about subtlety. This is the man behind the loud and sophomoric “Sucker Punch” and “Dawn of the Dead” after all. But with “Watchmen,” Snyder proved he could disassemble the superhero mythology and completely lands his masterpiece with his iteration of Superman. “Man of Steel” garners a ton of heart and soul, with a tale of Clark Kent’s journey for a sense of purpose and belonging in a home world that’s not his own.
Sharknado (2013)
Tara Reid. Killer Tornadoes. Man eating sharks. Sooner or later, someone was going to combine them to form the sweet piece of junk food cinema known as “Sharknado.” The Asylum almost seems proud of the title, flaunting it in film festivals and even presenting the title in big bold silver letters in the opening credits. With a title like that, you don’t even need to hear what it’s about. You just need to know that Ian Zeiring kicks ass. Who could resist this opportunity?
Jack the Giant Slayer (Blu-ray/DVD + UltraViolet Digital Copy) (2013)
I’m always of the opinion that there really isn’t anything new that we can do with classic fairytales, anymore. We can twist them, and reboot them, but in the end they’re really not going to feel fresh or inventive. It’s like that episode of “The Simpsons” where Marge couldn’t afford a new dress for her country club meetings, so she just kept re-designing the same dress over and over. “Jack the Giant Slayer” is exactly like that. Sure, it posits the idea that we’re being given a new tale, but in reality it’s just another take on Jack and the Beanstalk. But this ain’t yo daddy’s Jack and the Beanstalk! No sir! This is the true story of Jack and the Giants before the actual tale was invented.
Atlantic Rim (2013)
The Asylum’s answer to Guillermo Del Toro’s upcoming “Pacific Rim” is goofy, and often times inadvertently funny. But in the realm of science fiction from The Asylum, I’ve seen so much worse. The Asylum has been pretty good about their science fiction inputs, offering another solid robot movie “Transmorphers,” so I was much more open minded with this endeavor. I would take writer Jared Cohn to task for offering no build up to the action, but if he went the opposite route, I’d be complaining he took too long. So in that respect, “Atlantic Rim” gets a pass for knowing exactly what kind of film it is.
Monday Movie Pause: The Murders of Brandywine Theater Official Trailer
From Eddy Spaghetti Productions, A small town loser and puppeteer finally finds the courage he’s lacked all his life when his dummy, Moxxy, starts speaking up for him and, eventually, begins murdering those who always pushed him around. Starring Dian Bachar, Danielle Lozeau, and Diamond Dallas Page.
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vBZhKKK7tac]
Warm Bodies (2013)
In the universe of “Warm Bodies,” zombification is a metaphor for social inadequacy. Being a zombie makes it impossible for you to talk and socialize with anyone. The rare conversations a zombie does have, is nothing but grunts and a brief dismissal of the company kept. The really bad introverts are terribly animated skeletons with a thing for self-mutilation. This is kind of a PSA for social introverts but with monsters that you can call zombies. I guess they’re zombies. They’re undead, and they eat humans for sustenance. But I just have a hard time trying to figure out which audience “Warm Bodies” is trying to pander to, if anything. It’s definitely a movie for teenagers. The movie doesn’t so much make zombification a disease, as it is a deadly form of social anxiety.