The Animated Batman Report Card

It’s become common knowledge among comic book fans that most, if not all, of the animated movies made by Warner Bros. behind the scenes are much better in terms of storytelling, acting, and pure entertainment than any of the original live action Batman movies ever hoped to be. It’s just accepted as fact and looked upon as a damn shame. Because with such bloated budgets and big name actors, Tim Burton barely covered any of the pure excellence that Bruce Timm did with his voice cast.

So, in preparation for the much anticipated sequel to “Batman Begins” aptly called “The Dark Knight,” a sequel that is expected to top Nolan’s first film and thrill us with the new twisted joker, as well as the upcoming DVD release of “The Gotham Knight” another animated Batman film featuring Batman in his early years fighting new versions of his rogue gallery, I thought it’d be a great excuse to go over the list of animated Batman films that have been on Video (and DVD) and in theaters. Granted it was a very, very short theatrical run, but still, it counts. So, on we go.
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The Incredible Hulk (2008)

After the unfair lambasting of the disgustingly underrated and under appreciated “Hulk” from director Ang Lee, I found myself brutally conflicted on Louis Leterrier’s reboot (Remake? Revision? Restart?), because frankly, it was an apology to fans on a movie that didn’t need one. Lee tried something new, and was punished for it. Sure, Leterrier goes for the obvious, he goes for the simplistic, he shoots for the predictable, but that doesn’t mean “The Incredible Hulk” isn’t an entertaining movie. While I will be faithful to Ang Lee’s vision of the Hulk, Leterrier puts up a good argument for his version, too.

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Women in Cages (1971)

9o7HlcAWf3avyxTYaN6ePErrRKKCarol Jeffries was just set up by her boyfriend, a drug dealer who makes her take the wrap for a massive drug deal he was involved in during an illegal cock fight. Carol, a vulnerable and innocent woman, has just found herself in a women’s pen in the middle of nowhere with vicious female criminals. And she has nowhere to go but down, baby. She’s forced to endure the tribulations of prison life involving psychotic roommates, horrible living conditions, and a violent matron named Alabama (Ms. Pam Grier, herself) who sleeps with all the prisoners, and punishes them with “The Playpen” when they refuse to abide by her sexual favors. Did I mention the drug dealers on the outside are trying to assassinate Carol to keep her mouth shut?

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Cannibal Ferox (1981)

cannibal-ferox4Watching Ruggero Deodato’s “Cannibal Holocaust” was an experience that I still remember with fondness. I sat with the DVD in hand at my television with a pit in my stomach and prepared to finally view what is considered one of the most controversial and taboo films ever made. And I wasn’t disappointed. Watching “Cannibal Ferox” was a different experience altogether. Maybe it was because the movie is not as good as the aforementioned horror film, or maybe it’s because Umberto Lenzi approaches this horror flick from a sexploitation angle with sensual women ravaged by cannibals instead of the mock documentary style as Deodato’s film.

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Wanted

1144570-wantedSo, here I sat on the wobbly edge, wondering if I should even read “Wanted.” I mean no one cared about the comic, they loved the movie before it even arrived in theaters, and the stupid comic was short lived, but then I saw that final scene where our main character is screaming in to the page with the bubble reading “This is my Face While I’m fucking you in the ass,” and I chuckled so hard, I had to at least give it a chance. Lasting only six issues, and then being made in to a movie that’s kind of faithful to the comic. Wesley Gibson is an average man who… you’ve seen the trailers for the movie, I assume. Anyway, Wesley Gibson is your average schmuck who could have been played by someone a little more reliable than James Mcavoy. The guy’s a good actor, but not who I envisioned.

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Dirty Harry: Two Disc Special Edition (1971) (DVD)

11405Harry Callahan does all the dirty work. He does the dirty work that the people in the force wouldn’t do were it not for him. In the first half of “Dirty Harry,” he has to cut his lunch short and walk across the street in the middle of gun fire to stop a bank robber. And the cavalry is taking a while to get there and help him. He stops his eating, and is forced to single handedly put an end to the heist, and he goes back and finishes his lunch. He does it because he has to, because without him it all goes to shit. That’s Dirty Harry, the man with the magnum who sparked quite a controversy upon his introduction with many assuming he was an ode to, and endorsement for vigilantism and right wingers.

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Ms. 45 (1981)

45If there’s anything that gets my goat more than apocalypse films, and superhero films, it’s revenge flicks. Revenge movies make up some of the best cinema I’ve ever seen, from Samurai epics, to Western tales, and Abel Ferrera’s “Ms. 45” is that revenge movie in the vein of “I Spite on your Grave” where a woman who has suffered the crime of rape, now strikes out against all men, instead of the men who hurt her. Anna is a meek mute girl who designs clothes during the day time. On the way home, she’s anally raped on the street, and then staggers home wounded to find that a man has broken into her home and, angered that she has no valuables, decides to rape her… again.

Anna can’t catch a break, as you can imagine.

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