What can you do to royally piss me off? Cast three of the stupidest most untalented people in Hollywood in a remake. Yes, that’s right earning of a smack across the face. Take a Jack ass who is a Jack ass, a one-hit wonder, and a singer whose talents are in her sweater, and you have “The Dukes of Hazzard,” a cleaned up, PC spoof of the actual show that preceded it, that can never tell whether its taking itself seriously, or as a general satire of hillbillies.
Tag Archives: Comedy
Zombies By Design (2006)
The premise is actually quite clever. A ridiculous make over show, that gets its kicks and paycheck out of “re-animating” old homes enlists the help of a mad scientist they plan to put on television and rejuvenate his home. The problem is this mad scientist is indeed psychotic, and seven years before failed in a project that would create mechanic zombies for the military. Today the makeover show has signed onto re-do his house, but he has other plans for them. He wants to re-create his army come hell or high water.
Sky High (2005)
I’m a sucker for a good tale about superheroes and the learning of their abilities and so on. I admit that. I love a good superhero tale, and that’s why I didn’t completely dislike “Sky High,” because beneath its Disney muck, it’s actually a pretty fun tale about living up to your parents and the pressures of it. Michael Angarano is Will, the only son of a suburban couple who happen to be the world’s strongest superheroes. Ahem—they met during a battle and fell in love, and now are a team. “The Incredibles,” you say? Well, yes, but I just plain enjoyed Kurt Russell as a somewhat demented working class father who encourages his son to take up the family business. “Sky High” is busy, it’s colorful, and it will keep its target audience watching with a smile.
Crank (2006)
I know someone in Hollywood got a hold of a concept for a video game called “Crank,” and thought that this was too good to be some stupid old video game. So, they made it into a movie. Because “Crank” is essentially set up like a video game. Our hero gets up, watches a video that lays out the plot, and now he has to find the people who wronged him. In order to stop the poison, get epinephrine.
Level two: Get Epinephrine. Find the villain’s brother.
Level three: Find him and fight him. Keep your heart rate up.
Level Four: Steal a police cycle and drive as fast as you can before your heart slows down; avoid pedestrians and environment. The mob is after you now that you’re alive and may go after your girlfriend.
Snakes on a Train (2006)
For their credit, this is one of their more competent pieces of crap, and that’s because there’s considerably good gore, and an interesting take on ripping off “Snakes on a Plane.” But, if there’s any more of example of the inconsistency behind Asylum’s newest rip-off it’s the two characters at the beginning whom are illegal immigrants and can’t understand nor speak English to a Texas man sneaking them across the border, yet when they get on a train and meet a friend, they begin understanding and speaking perfect English.
Tomb Hackers (2003)
Director Anthony Thurman’s film “Tomb Hackers” is a fun short animated film about the misadventures of two explorers who find themselves getting deeper and deeper in trouble as they venture in search of a fortune. The gags in Thurman’s film are mostly hit and miss with some gags that don’t really hit the mark, but when the gags hit they’re very funny.
Accepted (2006)
I’ll say I had zero expectations in regards to “Accepted”, mainly because it looked so ridiculous, and vapid. And it is, but I enjoyed it, because it provides a very entertaining ninety minutes that starts out as a typical college comedy and transforms into a somewhat interesting social commentary. And it’s funny as hell. I like Justin Long a lot, I’ve liked him since “Jeepers Creepers” and in “Accepted”, he’s funny as a quasi-Ferris Bueller named Bartleby Gaines who has slacked off through high school, and to prevent breaking it to his family that he can’t get into any schools, he instead invents a school which then snowballs into a grand hoax.