The New Guy (2002)

Posted on August 23, 2003 by Felix Vasquez

Dizzy Harrison (D.J. Qualls) is an unpopular geek at Rock Creek High School and after an embarrassing accident with an erection, he decides to transfer schools but makes an oath to be a new man at his new school. He meets Luther (Eddie Griffith) a convict in a prison who decides to help him and teach him how to be cool and intimidate people, but can he pull it off when Rocky Creek students recognize him? “The New Guy” has barely any chuckles in it and has a ton of moments when you’re supposed to suspend logic and common sense. Why the character Dizzy would equate being a convict with popularity is beyond me.

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Undisputed (2002)

Posted on July 3, 2003 by Felix Vasquez

From the beginning I could tell this would be a stinker purely from the way the movie derives from true life events. The character “Iceman” could purely be based on Mike Tyson alone, but fails where it has a chance to invoke some truly witty social commentary. Ving Rhames tries his hardest to look conniving and arrogant but most of the time comes off as laughable and outrageous looking like a hokey but smarter Mike Tyson imitation. Wesley Snipes also attempts to pull off the gruff silent hero persona with skills, but fails as well coming off as a mere caricature with no depth to him at all. The movie has a primary problem that plagues this: It has no focus. I wasn’t sure if this movie had any main character to begin with, because the movie doesn’t focus on any of the characters in particular.

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FearDotCom (2002)

Posted on June 24, 2003 by Felix Vasquez

The problem with this film is that it’s an evident rip-off or to put it nicely, “homage” to the Japanese cult horror film “The Ring.’ The plot is simple and straight to the point: bad website cursed, bad website kill, people who look at site die, the end. I was very intrigued to watch this, because I am anxiously awaiting “The Ring” and haven’t seen it, yet, so I figured this movie would be the next best thing… boy, was I dead wrong, dead, dead wrong.

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Equilibrium (2002)

Posted on June 22, 2003 by Felix Vasquez

If I was to explain this movie to someone in one sentence it would be this: “George Orwell meets John Woo”. I thought about Orwell he’d probably approve of this film. The center for which all the soldiers come from is called “Equilibrium” or balance as it is layman’s terms; they’re all injected with an opium drug that they carry that numbs their emotions and sense of guilt while they’re controlled by the heavily armed heavily secure government facility. Paired with incredible direction and writing by Kurt Wimmer and sleek stylish cinematography by Dion Beebe, we’re given a glimpse into a world that’s still imperfect despite it being under control.

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Bully (2001)

Posted on June 10, 2003 by Felix Vasquez

Based on a true story, we meet Marty Puccio a troubled guy who is being abused by his friend Bobby Kent until one day his girlfriend Lisa decides to group a bunch of friends to kill him. After his brutal murder paranoia ensues within the group. Over the past few years I’ve noticed a startling resemblance among Clark’s films, so I didn’t expect much of a difference from this and “Kids.” The story plays out as we see the naive and brain dead Marty who only surfs and watches Television is bullied by his malicious best friend Bobby. The characters are fascinating because Bobby is at times very abusive at one point hitting Marty across the face in anger, but when they’re alone he sincerely tells him, “You’re my best friend.”

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City by the Sea (2002)

Posted on May 22, 2003 by Felix Vasquez

For a film that’s identified as a bonafide thriller, the concept and entire plot is completely downplayed and low-key. I was never sure which direction it wanted go but it definitely does not become a thriller. It segues into all directions of plots never sure where it’s headed. The film is a story about relationships; the relationship Lemarca has with his ex-wife represents his past, the relationship with his new girlfriend represents his current life, and his son represents the past he abandoned. This could have been some amazing metaphors to mesh into the film, but it’s ultimately ruined.

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Rollerball (2002)

Posted on May 18, 2003 by Felix Vasquez

Now, granted, I’ve never seen the original “Rollerball” starring the great James Caan, but I think I can assure you, that it might have been better than this fiasco. The movie force-feeds us predictable and uninspired action scenes of people rolling around on their amped up blades and motorcycles as different growling and hooting players wearing ridiculous costumes and helmets bash each others skulls in etching to grab a hold of the rollerball attempting to score a point for a specific country as different announcers from the countries broadcasting the games holler at us through the screen play-by-play.

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