In the end I felt nothing watching “Repo!” Did I hate it? No. Did I loved it? Sometimes, only sometimes and this thanks to the performances by the cast of little known or breakthrough performers who help to tell the story of a society where kidneys are a business and one boss Ritto wants to flourish. This is an age where musicals are now the basic norm and have been raking in the bucks. It’s just sad that a musical that pitches to every audience, we horror fans aren’t included. There are even thick operatic tones thanks to the dulcet tones of Paul Sorvino; it’s a grab bag for the whole lot.
Tag Archives: Cult
5ive Girls (2006)
You just have to appreciate a horror movie that asks you to take it seriously, all the while having an opening theme song of techno pop set to Ron Perlman’s voice quoting bible passages. That’s new. “5ive Girls” is another religious themed supernatural low budget fest that really attempts to think of itself as a sequel of “The Craft.” And trust me if you’ve seen the aforementioned title, then you really have no obligation to see this. Alex just moved into town with her father, and is forced to attend a local reformatory that takes in wayward girls. Alex, of course, possesses telekinesis, and is really disobedient and sure enough, she finds friends in the individuals reform school girls who all discover they serve a higher purpose. They are apparently the Supernatural friends, five girls who possess unique abilities, including Alex who is pretty much Carrie White but hotter. Fans of “Charmed” and the Fairuza Balk vehicle will definitely find interest in this thriller, as it basically really takes a great premise and does nothing really exciting with it.
Sonoda’s “5ive Girls” isn’t an awful movie by any standards, but the attempts at murk and atmosphere pretty much sap every bit of energy and pacing from the story and performances. There are your usual clichés including a sympathetic priest, a monstrous head mistress, lesbian subtext, the usual arguments between the female students, and the constant flashing of the pentagram. “5ive Girls” is such a run of the mill supernatural film that the concept never really garnered any interest my way. The characters are all so interchangeable and forgettable. One can walk through walls, one can heal through touch and yet I really couldn’t point out which girl had which power if you asked me to. The sad fact is that the film really sells itself as a hip Gothic parade of black magic and evil and yet has the lagging pace of “Whispering Corridors.”
Sonoda’s direction really doesn’t add much to the lagging proceedings in the end, and in spite of all the attempts to spin the formula, this story has been done and much better. In a reform school of apparently only five girls, they do nothing but yap back and forth with no real substance or interesting exchanges, and the visions continue just to remind us that we’re watching a horror film. We already know who the demonic entity challenging them is, and we’re well aware that the girl power message will strive to defeat the demon in the end; “5ive Girls” holds no surprises, and is just flat out dull. Sonoda’s supernatural horror flick would be a lot of fun if it wasn’t so boring, rehashed, and cliché. “5ive Girls” has a great concept to it, with some good names behind it, but it just fails to muster anything memorable or entertaining from the groundwork it lays down before us.
Justice League of America (1997)
The nineties were filled with an almost endless stream of pretty bad comic book adaptations. From the awfully boring “Generation X” that featured a goofy Matt Frewer doing his best Joker impression to a bunch of interchangeable teen superheroes, the ridiculous “Fantastic Four” which while strictly a cult movie in the comic underground, was a pure travesty, to the utterly abysmal “Batman Forever” and “Batman and Robin,” we saw it all, and most of it was things we wish we wouldn’t have. And then there’s “Justice League of America.” Boy oh boy. The problem with this product is that it’s not awful as it is unintentionally ridiculous, and while the cast tries their damndest, we can never get past the horrible costumes, and the terrible special effects.
Spider Baby or, The Maddest Story Ever Told: Director's Cut (1968) (DVD)
“Spider-Baby” is without a doubt one of the oddest cannibal movies I’ve ever come across. And it’s not because it’s old, but because the cannibalism ends up becoming much more implied than explored in the end. There isn’t exactly anyone eating other folks here, but there are often the signs. Young Virginia collects ears, and eats bugs, while Elizabeth attempts to guilt her into her natural urges, even though she’s experiencing the same cravings to give in.
Penny Dreadful's Shilling Shockers: Season Two (DVD)
Penny Dreadful is a hot hunk of woman, and in a world where Elvira, Zacharly, Joe Bob Briggs, Dr. Demento and many other folks helped to ease the pain of horrible movies, Penny Dreadful and her friends could be the carrier of the torch. In the genre of horror, the females mostly always rule. Men still love Elvira, Vampira, Debbie Rochon, and the rest of the legendary brood, and Penny Dreadful carries this legacy with a New England series that excels at showing truly awful films.
Penny Dreadful’s smexxiness otherwise cushions the blow of the garbage like “The Beast of Yucca Flats,” and it’s a suggested little horror series where you can find it on Public Access. “Shilling Shockers” is obviously a series that derives from the formula of “Horrible Horror” and “Mystery Science Theater,” in which our hostess, Penny Dreadful, has some fun with props, entertains us with some funny commentary, and introduces a bad film.
Roger Corman: Metaphysics on a Shoestring [Paperback]
However the huge compendium of Roer Corman’s massive body of work, “Roger Corman: Metaphysics on a Shoestring” has steadily convinced me that I’ve missed out on someone of great importance. I understood Corman’s legacy, and importance, and his great influence on film since he began making films, but I was never one who followed him as a fan would. What Silver and Ursini have done is give folks like me a reason to gain interest into the body of the work of Roger Corman. Anyone who still has a stigma of him as a man who made bad films would be better off to read this book that’s an encyclopedia, an analyses of Corman’s work, and a biography all rolled into one. It’s the perfect tool for anyone seeking a new interest in Corman’s unique filmography.
Grindhouse (2007)
Let’s face it fair readers, I was born in the wrong era. While I’m living in the time of cell phones and reality television, I should be living in the time of grind houses, and porno theaters. While I’m in a time of Kelly Clarkson, I should be in a time of Donna Summer. Simply put, I wish I was born during another time. But, you have to admit, Tarantino and Rodriguez got what they wanted. They wanted to create the grind house experience, and that’s exactly what I received. A double feature, scratchy film, and an empty theater. It’s me and my family, and about four other people, and no one got the joke. Continue reading