Zathura: A Space Adventure (2005)

zathura_house

I was not a fan of “Jumanji.” Beyond the great special effects it was a rather boring, and confusing lollapalooza with sub-par performances, and a cheesy ending. So when the unofficial sequel “Zathura” arrived in theaters, suffice it to say my skepticism was tantamount to my skepticism of “Sharkboy and Lavagirl.” It looked well intentioned but basically looked like an empty spectacle. In a world filled with “Hoot,” “Sharkboy and Lavagirl,” and “Sleepover” which are the considered the crème de la crème of children’s fare, “Zathura” is a welcome change of pace. It doesn’t talk down its audience, it doesn’t paint clichés, it doesn’t insult our intelligence, and its entertainment is enjoyable for both adults and children. That’s rare.

Continue reading →

Sky High (2005)

tEHvtdGUKiWtELUNYF9aHJ1p6kTI’m a sucker for a good tale about superheroes and the learning of their abilities and so on. I admit that. I love a good superhero tale, and that’s why I didn’t completely dislike “Sky High,” because beneath its Disney muck, it’s actually a pretty fun tale about living up to your parents and the pressures of it. Michael Angarano is Will, the only son of a suburban couple who happen to be the world’s strongest superheroes. Ahem—they met during a battle and fell in love, and now are a team. “The Incredibles,” you say? Well, yes, but I just plain enjoyed Kurt Russell as a somewhat demented working class father who encourages his son to take up the family business. “Sky High” is busy, it’s colorful, and it will keep its target audience watching with a smile.

Continue reading →

Kicking & Screaming (2005)

Kicking_and_ScreamingI have found that comedies, even the good ones, have become so utterly predictable, that it’s not even funny. Pun intended. The good comedies are even predictable, and the mediocre ones are so predictable that I’ve discovered I can really lay out what’s going to happen before it happens. “Kicking and Screaming” begins on a truly predictable note. Narration. Instead of leaving our main character to pretty much show the audience how inept or stupid he is the writers feel that the actor and director are so incompetent of explaining through actions what and who they are, that they must explain to us through narration.

Continue reading →

The Legend of Zorro (2005)

DF-09483_rv4_aThe creators of “Legend” have decided to take what made the first film so good and turn the sequel and its story into another “Spy Kids” rip off. Well, not so much “Spy Kids”, but a shameless rip off of “The Mummy Returns”. Male adventurer and female damsel both evolve into settled individuals that happen to have a son who is clever, smart mouthed, and both mutter at some point a variation of “My dad is going to kick your ass” to the grizzled villain. The derivations are so damn shameless that I felt bile of sheer disgust starting this film. The fact that the creators felt the need to add a snot nosed little brat who is there simply as one giant walking cliché, to make the film more “exciting” as merely just obvious pandering to a younger crowd, is condescending, since you figure Zorro did much of that already.

Continue reading →

Undertow (2004)

undertowJosh Lucas is an excellent actor, he can be, he aspires to be, but when he stars in crap like “Stealth” and “Glory Road”, he really continues to stay a footnote on the end of audience’s memories. But then he stars in films like “Undertow”, and you feel saddened, as I did, wondering: If this guy can give such a horrifying performance here, why can’t he take those talents and put them to good use? Lucas’s performance as a menacing uncle is basically on par with DeNiro as Max Cady, with Robert Mitchum in “Night of the Hunter” thrown in for good measure. That’s just about all there is to it.

Continue reading →

Valiant (2005)

valiantMessenger pigeons were a crucial aspect to the victory of World War 2, and an integral foundation to the survival of the soldiers on the battlefield. “Valiant” is a fun adventure story revolving around messenger pigeons during the Second World War, and it’s surprisingly entertaining. I know it’d be hip to describe “Valiant” as simply lackluster, but I had fun, I had a lot fun, and there are possible reasons for it: I love the British culture, so I have a weakness for anything involving it. I love British comedy. And I love British comedians, and the cast is filled with nothing but talented, legendary British actors and comedians. I mean with cast of Ewan McGregor, Ricky Gervais, Hugh Laurie, Jim Broadbent, Tim Curry, John Cleese, and many, many more, how could I not enjoy this film? And I did.

Continue reading →

Superman: Brainiac Attacks (2006)

While I love Bruce Timm, and while I appreciate him bringing DC out from the stone age and into modern times, he basically ruined the Superman series, and never realized it to the full potential it was capable of. Timm, a hardcore fan of batman, relegated Supes to secondary character, and when he actually focused on Superman, he never really understood what the character was about. Even in the “Justice League” series, Timm always tried to push Batman into the center square and downsize on the Superman character. So you can imagine my sheer ease when the announcement for the new Superman animated movie would not feature Timm on board.

Continue reading →