I was very open-minded about the possibility that I would be completely surprised with “Rent.” I never drew much attention to its release into theaters, and I never bothered to see it when it was in the theater, so I approached “Rent” with as much optimism and benefit of the doubt I could muster up. Then when I was finished with it, I realized I received what I was expecting. I mean, you can’t get much from a musical with a pastiche of musical numbers that resemble a series of rejected commercial jingles. “Rent” is very apropos to the stigma of modern underground theater, with the art savants creating productions filled with supermodels representing “real” people in New York City.
Tag Archives: Romance
Accepted (2006)
I’ll say I had zero expectations in regards to “Accepted”, mainly because it looked so ridiculous, and vapid. And it is, but I enjoyed it, because it provides a very entertaining ninety minutes that starts out as a typical college comedy and transforms into a somewhat interesting social commentary. And it’s funny as hell. I like Justin Long a lot, I’ve liked him since “Jeepers Creepers” and in “Accepted”, he’s funny as a quasi-Ferris Bueller named Bartleby Gaines who has slacked off through high school, and to prevent breaking it to his family that he can’t get into any schools, he instead invents a school which then snowballs into a grand hoax.
Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby (2006)
Bobby is a boy who dreams of becoming a racer, and when he finally gets the chance, he becomes one of the most popular racers in the industry. That is until he has a break down after a crash and now must rebuild what was taken away from him. Ferrell’s foray into adult comedy once again is a weak and mediocre one, and for every one hilarious joke that “Talladega Nights” hits with audiences, there are about four or five that really fail to be as funny as it could be. McKay’s film is too aware of itself, and instead of playing it deadpan while delivering the gags and jokes, it desperately tries to gauge laughs from the audience, including every such nuance and quirk it can just to assure itself that we’ll laugh.
Kisses and Caroms: Uncensored Director's Cut (2006)
This is the day in the life, the day in the life of some clerks. These clerks work at a local store which never gets much business yet they still manage to experience many crazy customers and have stories to tell. No, this isn’t a Kevin Smith movie, but “Kisses and Caroms” really wishes it were. I like the fact that people tend to think every profession sports a slew of assorted characters and various nuts, but that’s just not life; life is not filled with nuts and outlandish weirdo’s who trot in and out to give you a hard time. Thanks a lot Kevin Smith, you prick. So instead of a video and convenience store we instead focus on a group of clerks who work at a billiard store.
Lady in the Water (2006)
M. Night Shyamalan is nothing if not ambitious; I mean he creates films like a child seeking to spin his own stories in his own universe that could form a canon for aspiring filmmakers to launch from, and his vision gets in the way of his film and his fairy tale spins on its own while the film struggles to keep up. I enjoyed most of the fairy tale Shyamalan invents here involving a creature that can camouflage as grass, a mermaid, a giant eagle, and monkeys. If you’re wondering about his famous and infamous surprise ending, there isn’t one. There’s just one plot twist that’s interesting, and that’s all, so I won’t ruin much here. Continue reading
John Tucker Must Die (2006)
Dear Brittany Snow,
I love you. And I want you to know it. I’ve loved you since “American Dreams”, and have ever since. I’d gladly listen to a continuous loop of “Secret Lover” as sung by Kevin Federline, and William Hung just to have the chance to eat grapes off of your ass crack and confess my unrequited love to thee while you parade yourself in the red silk lingerie you’re featured in midway. Yes, this is true. And I’m not ashamed to admit it. You say creepy, but I say lovelorn. I’m only human, damn it!
And we’re back.
Supercross (2005)
If you needed any verification towards the quality of “Supercross” you need look no further than the first ten minutes. After our character narrates that he and his brother are close, and that just because they’re close doesn’t mean they never compete, and that their father dreamed of having them as Supercross stars, we’re subjected to a nearly ten minute long opening featuring a montage of motocross sequences set to a dramatic scores and flickering credits. Oh joy. And then there’s the actual film after the stunt show. We’re dragged along with pool cleaners whom rely on their jobs and have nothing else in their lives except their job, which they rely on, and their bikes.