Hard Candy (2005)

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Those upset by the ex-pedophile makes good story of “The Woodsman” may find consolation in “Hard Candy”, which is basically just a film about a pedophile that gets what he had coming to him all this time. While “The Woodsman” is basically about redemption “Hard Candy” is very much a one-sided revenge flick in the vein of “I Spit on Your Grave”, and “Audition”. Incidentally enough, both films with opposite depictions of pedophilia bear the same red riding hood metaphors. “Hard Candy” begins with the glow of a computer screen with two people chatting online and engaging in heavy flirting and finally, after a run around, decides to meet up. The two people in question are a fourteen year old named Hayley, and Jeff, a man in his thirties.

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Stomp! Shout! Scream! (2005)

MVI’m still trying to wrap my brain around the concept of how independent filmmakers with limited resources are so able to achieve the sixties camp value and genuine atmosphere of the kitschy sock hop era so easily, and yet studios with bloated budgets really can’t hit that mark. “Stomp! Shout! Scream!” is a well done fifties throwback that kept me engrossed from the opening musical montage that hit the mark without much effort. And I dare you not to tap your feet to the catchy theme song entitled—well—“Stomp! Shout! Scream!”

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Yes (2005)

“Maybe there isn’t a design”, the cleaner examines to her audience, but then maybe there is. Maybe there’s a god and this is all a large plan, but maybe there isn’t and this all just random, then what of our existence and how we can leaves traces of ourselves long after we’ve died? “It doesn’t end when we’ve died”, the cleaner declares. Shirley Henderson gives a fascinating performance as “the cleaner” an entity who hovers around everyone in their household and cleans and wipes up after them and could very well be a ghost because she’s just a watcher.

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Maria Full of Grace (2003)

maria-full-of-graceYou may not think to look at it, but “Maria Full of Grace” is quite possibly one of the tenset films made in years. Mostly centered on suspense and agonizing tension, “Maria” is a film about the drug trafficking world, the world where desperate people are duped in to becoming mules for Colombian drug lords. Catalina Sandino Moreno gives an excellent performance as the spoiled and head strong Maria who basically lives the mundane life of a teenager in Colombia. Marston’s film about the experience of not only people seeking a better life in what they perceive as a Utopia, but also of drug mules.

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When a Stranger Calls (2006)

wasc-043Do you know how your little brother or cousin would always pop out from a corner with a mask and yell “boo!” and then you’d be scared. And then amused, he’d continue doing so. Again, and again, and again, until you started to get angry. But he continued doing it until you tore the mask off and kicked him in the nuts? Well, that’s what my experience was like with Simon West’s remake of “When a Stranger Calls”. Now, I haven’t seen the original film just yet, but I imagine it won’t make me want to kick the director in the nuts. Imagine this: I took a camera and filmed myself around the house. You would see me drinking water, taking a dump, cleaning my ears, walking around the hallway… I know you’re saying “That’s stupid, I’d never see that”. Well, then you may want to stay away from this.

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Amateur Porn Star Killer (2005)

gzj00KlIn the opening of “Amateur Porn Star Killer”, the character Brandon travels around the dark streets looking and searching. For what? Well, it’s not that difficult to figure out. Upon his searching, in the lower right hand corner, in a small window box, a young blonde girl silently undresses and parades herself around. By this simple scene of our killer driving through the murky streets, and this young woman, we’re able to fully comprehend the extent of this man’s lunacy. The flesh is something many men crave. And the flesh is something many men would admittedly kill for.

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Flightplan (2005)

flightplan-screenThese days I don’t expect masterpieces anymore. I just don’t. Film has progressed to the point where you just can’t expect greatness no matter how much you doubt yourself, and I rarely see films these days that I can say with all honesty was flawless. Of course, that’s almost impossible. With “Flightplan” I didn’t expect it to be a masterpiece, nor did I expect it to be a great film, but I wanted pretty damn good. And they couldn’t even serve me up that. Since when does ninety-three minutes of “Where’s my daughter?! I want to find my daughter!” qualify as a good movie these days? I want to know. Because, I can’t muster up the logic in the success of this film, this mediocre piece of crap.

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