Flying Piranhas! Flying fucking piranhas! How does one mess up a film about flying piranhas?! I would love to view “Piranha II” as a film experience that’s so bad it’s good, but in reality it’s so bad that it’s actually just bad. It’s no wonder James Cameron tries to pretend he had nothing to do with this film and disowns it like a stepchild. It’s a bad movie and one that poorly takes off from the concept the 1978 film laid down. It’s a shame that a movie that completely reworks the concept of killer piranhas in to something even cheesier basically doesn’t have a clue on how to handle the creatures.
Category Archives: Movie Reviews
Piranha (1978)
Admittedly up until this year I hadn’t actually seen Joe Dante’s “Piranha” before. And for folks who still haven’t seen it to this day in spite of its apparent cult status, Dante’s horror picture might be a little jarring. Tonally “Piranha” is unusual and quite surreal. The first half of the film is almost like a B dark comedy featuring drawn out bouts of exposition and a small stop motion bipedal fish walking around a secret lab for some inexplicable reason. The next half then suddenly becomes a stern straight faced horror film with the atmosphere amped up to eleven. It’s such an oddity on film that I couldn’t help but enjoy it from start to finish.
Fright Night (2011)
Don’t be fooled by the hullabaloo, “Fright Night” 2011 is a mess. And not just a mess but a pretty crummy remake of a movie that is deserving of its classic status. As a remake it switches elements up plot wise and distorts much of the themes of the original film’s narrative, but at the end of the day it’s all just so horribly put together that it’s all just so poorly conceived and eventually becomes incredibly monotonous. Like most modern remakes of classic horror films, this completely misses the point of the original film. But then that’s the point, many will argue. The point of the film is that it misses the point of the original film.
Piranha 3DD (2012)
Let’s be real here, it’s not like “Piranha 3D” was a cerebral ride in to the inner depths of human complexity. It was a basically ridiculous and absolutely brain dead film that, in spite of my original negative review, is something of a movie I can sit through for ninety minutes to pass the time. “Piranha 3D” is watchable in spite of its awfulness because it knows how to balance humor and terror and makes use of its throwbacks. This sequel however fails on every conceivable level and is practically the antithesis of entertainment. It’s a black hole of nothing sometimes, with a premise that goes nowhere when it’s going everywhere.
42nd Street Forever: The Blu-Ray Edition (2012)
For Grindhouse aficionados, “42nd Street Forever” is historic as a release because it’s quite possibly one of the greatest compilations of grindhouse film trailers around. At nearly four hours in length, “42nd Street Forever” compiles a plethora of grindhouse trailers and rare press footage that passes through the various phases of the grindhouse plateau that will appease the appetites of many fans alike. There are numerous trailers for blaxploitation, asianslpoitation, porn, erotica, cannibal films, and much, much more including rare trailers to films like “Italian Stallion,” the rare porno starring Sylvester Stallone.
Zombi 2 (1979)
For the uninitiated, back in 1978 when George A Romero’s “Dawn of the Dead” was released in foreign countries, it was renamed “Zombi” and re-cut for Italian audiences sans the dark comedy. When the movie became a hit, Lucio Fulci took it upon himself to direct the “sequel” entitled “Zombi 2.” Basically, Fulci’s “Zombi 2” is not actually a sequel to Romero’s “Dawn” but unofficially his horror film acts as a pseudo sequel/prequel for “Dawn.” So basically “Dawn” has two sequels, one official, and one unofficial. I of course prefer “Day of the Dead,” but Lucio Fulci’s “Zombi 2” is not without its merits. It’s a terrifying and often haunting zombie film filled with such effective gore and grue that you could smell the stench of the walking dead permeate off the screen at times.
Comic-Con Episode IV: A Fan's Hope (2012)
Well how about that? Someone finally gets it. Morgan Spurlock has become one of the most notable documentary directors of all time and thankfully with “Comic Con Episode 4” he chooses to spotlight an area of the world that garners a lot of attention and acclaim and yet rarely gets looked upon with much respect. It’s so easy to kick at fan boys in today’s pop culture storm because they’re simply the easiest targets around. But what Morgan Spurlock accomplishes with the help of Stan Lee and Joss Whedon, is depict fan boys in a light we rarely ever see: human. In the grand tradition of films like “Trekkies,” Spurlock spotlights the entire comic con experience from multiple angles to allow the general audience to explore that comic con as a whole is not just a simple gathering of fan boys across the world, but a testament to hard work and for some, a day that decides the rest of their lives.