Preparing to go in to festivals soon enough, I was able to get a hold of “I Spyders” through online means and I’m glad that I did. “I Spyders” is quite possibly one of the most skin crawling and yet unabashedly demented short films you’ll see in a while. This is one of the few short films that manages to have a spider wrangler on set, and when they can acquire an actual wrangler, you know the director is at least trying hard to get his point across. That’s called effort, filmmakers. That’s the word for this review. “I Spyders” isn’t so much a horror movie in the traditional sense, but its premise is very much horrific. Especially for anyone who is an avid arachnophobe.
Killer Eye: Halloween Haunt (2011)
If you’re a hardcore Full Moon Entertainment fan and really follow their films by the tee, then you’ll love “The Haunt.” Basically it’s a self-aware meta-sequel to their cult classic “The Killer Eye.” This time though the movie is simply just a movie in this reality and in this world we set down on, Full Moon is just a company that treads out horror movies. We visit with a group of hormonally unbalanced lesbian best friends who spend their time dancing, and flirting with one another all the while preparing for a big Halloween exhibit one of the girls’ mother is throwing. Of course they spend the night drinking and unpacking the props for the Halloween house which are obviously nothing but Full Moon props.
Thirsty (2009)
Deep down I know I shouldn’t have enjoyed “Thirsty” so much and that’s mainly because the premise is so simplistic and absurd that it’s tough to take seriously at all. But that’s the intent behind “Thirsty.” It’s a free for all of absurd comedy and dark fantasy that keeps viewers entertained all the way through. And as a short film it knows when to stop the joke and thankfully the screenwriters know when to quit while they’re ahead. Joe Lynch plays the hopelessly over the top protagonist Joe, a young man on the road during a heat wave who manages to get on the bad side of a gas station attendant when he mouths off to him.
Skull Heads (2009)
I understand at a certain point there has to be caution drawn about the budget, but would it hurt to have a film about characters that can do something other than stare in to the camera and make miniscule movements? “Skullheads” is a story about the worst guardians of all time, guardians of a large castle who do nothing but appear in mirrors every so often and watch the owners of the castle inflict horrible pain on one another. Beyond that, “Skullheads” is basically a ninety minute melodrama that draws the concept for the skull heads but has no idea what to do with them until much later on in the film.
Nailbiter (2013)
When I thought about it, “Nailbiter” was not a movie I expected from the looks of the set photos and general premise a few years ago. Director Patrick Rea has kept his film generally hush hush even from his closest confidants and as such “Nailbiter” has been something of a welcomed treat from the director. One of my favorite indie directors working today, Patrick Rea finally enters the feature length film arena with “Nailbiter,” a tense and spooky film that will grace many screens come Halloween. A perfect holiday film, “Nailbiter” tries to keep its promise of staying a white knuckle horror film all throughout with a premise reliant on survival and characters. Thankfully, “Nailbiter” has a strong character base to it, relying on the charms and personality of its core cast to sell what is a rather tense concept from minute one.
Remote (1993)
“Home Alone” was a smash hit in America, and to this day it’s one of the landmark blockbuster films of all time based solely around such a simplistic formula of comedy and storytelling. After the success of “Home Alone” every single studio in America from the big guns to the low budget filmmakers sought to create their very own successful film starring a rambunctious kid and a group of inept criminals with some physical comedy thrown in for good measure. Many variations tried and failed. Among them was Charles Band’s very own “Remote.” Directed by Ted Nicolaou “Remote” is a film I vaguely remember back in the days of VHS rentals.
A Senior Moment (2012)
I was pretty sure I had an idea of where this film was going, but thankfully as with most productions with Patrick Rea behind it, you can never underestimate it or its ability to be clever and pull the rug out from audiences. That’s basically what “A Senior Moment” is all about, in the end. Sure it’s a nice and sweet little short about the lives of elderly folks that are amazingly similar to those of the younger persuasion, but the climax it leads up to is what kept lingering in my mind and giggling afterward.