The numbskull duo from the bland action yarn “Shanghai Noon” return for yet another vehicle sequel “Shanghai Knights.” I was not a fan of the original film, I thought it was yet another bland vehicle for Wilson and Chan who seem to only be charismatic and funny when paired with a complete opposite. This sequel didn’t prove to be anything new or innovative as well; it was just an endless sequence of comedic dialogue, fight scene, comedic dialogue, fight scene, and so on, so it’s obvious I felt jumbled by the sloppy story and cheap plot devices.
Tag Archives: Martial Arts
Underworld (2003)
In this horror action film directed by Len Wiseman, Kate Beckinsale plays Selene, a warrior and assassin for a vampire clan who is on the hunt for a young doctor named Michael Corvin who bears an unknown gift, but now the vampire clan is at war with a rival clan of Lycans (werewolves) who are intent in crossing the young man over to their side; but soon Selene and Michael begin falling in love as the war intensifies and must choose between their family or love. I remember when I went to the theaters to check this out; I had ten dollar bill in my hand and I had to choose between “Cabin Fever” or this. I inevitably made a decision that I would soon live to regret for all my days as I chose “Cabin Fever” hoping I’d come across a horror gem, I really wish I would have chosen this instead.
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003)
Loosely based on the critically acclaimed comic book from critically acclaimed author Alan Moore, “LXG” tells the tale of Allan Quartmain, an aging adventurer in 1899 who is called upon by a mysterious man named M who enlists him and six other super-powered beings whose powers are parallel to legendry literary characters who must fight a warlord called “The Phantom” who plans to take over the world. Alan Moore presents an idea and concept so ingenious and brilliant, I was stunned upon hearing of it. Take some of the most famous heroes and villains in literary history and turn them into superheroes. What turns up as the end result is a guilty pleasure that kept me entertained all the way through.
The Transporter (2002)
I started off enjoying this film, but by the second half I began to notice something: I was zoning out. Why would I zone out? Simply because the second half is rushed, contrived, and boring. The film started off as a really awesome sleek and stylish piece of action, but then started to head off into such a predictable route. The entire second half begins to feel so tacked on and meaningless that I immediately began losing interest. It wasn’t hard to notice the shoddy fight choreography where we can see Statham pulling his punches on the stuntman with his slow fight maneuvers. I tried to ignore it but soon knew that I’d seen better fighting in a Van Damne flick, and that’s pretty pathetic.
Half Past Dead (2002)
This is like the action masterpiece “The Rock”, except for the fact that “The Rock” was original, and this is just as awful as anything I’ve ever seen. After being busted in a car theft ring, two gangster friends Nick (rapper Ja Rule) and Sasha (Steven Seagal) are jailed in New Alcatraz prison where mercenaries break in and storm the prison to hold a prisoner ransom who knows the location of a secret stash of over two hundred million dollars in gold. Now they must team up with other prisoners and beat the mercenaries before they kill everyone. I got the sense this is supposed to be a futuristic film, but there’s never truly verification. The prison is re-opened due to overcrowding and it’s supposedly advanced but shockingly stone age. The prison is supposed to be state of the art and advanced but there’s a shockingly low head count when it comes to prisoners (I counted twenty-five).
Spy Kids 2: Island of Lost Dreams (2002)
After a raid by armed soldiers during a party with the world’s top agents and their kids, Juni Cortez (Daryl Sabara), the youngest of the Cortez spy family is accused of stealing the high powered super weapon The Transmooker Device. Now Carmen (Alexa Vega) and Juni Cortez must travel to the island of lost dreams and face off against monsters, soldiers, and rival agents Girti (Emily Osment) and Gary Giggles and find the real transmooker device before the evil Donnagon (Mike Judge) gets a hold of it and prove Juni’s innocence. But their parents and meddlesome grandparents are on the hunt for the kids before they’re killed. I tend to easily grow tired of family movies if they’re either too hokey or corny; most of the time, they’re both.
Equilibrium (2002)
If I was to explain this movie to someone in one sentence it would be this: “George Orwell meets John Woo”. I thought about Orwell he’d probably approve of this film. The center for which all the soldiers come from is called “Equilibrium” or balance as it is layman’s terms; they’re all injected with an opium drug that they carry that numbs their emotions and sense of guilt while they’re controlled by the heavily armed heavily secure government facility. Paired with incredible direction and writing by Kurt Wimmer and sleek stylish cinematography by Dion Beebe, we’re given a glimpse into a world that’s still imperfect despite it being under control.