Basically what’s hypothesized in “Prometheus” is what if the thing that created us sought out the answers to what created it? And what if in the process of figuring out its own creation, it managed to accidentally create us? And what would happen if the thing that created us in a mission to figure out what created it, actually really wasn’t a God, and pretty much hates out guts for being accidental spawns of its experimentation? It’s a dichotomy and a contradiction that’s worth exploring, because it’s a startling and absolutely crushing notion to comprehend, but not with “Prometheus.”
Tag Archives: Mystery
Piranha II: The Spawning (1981)
Flying Piranhas! Flying fucking piranhas! How does one mess up a film about flying piranhas?! I would love to view “Piranha II” as a film experience that’s so bad it’s good, but in reality it’s so bad that it’s actually just bad. It’s no wonder James Cameron tries to pretend he had nothing to do with this film and disowns it like a stepchild. It’s a bad movie and one that poorly takes off from the concept the 1978 film laid down. It’s a shame that a movie that completely reworks the concept of killer piranhas in to something even cheesier basically doesn’t have a clue on how to handle the creatures.
Piranha (1978)
Admittedly up until this year I hadn’t actually seen Joe Dante’s “Piranha” before. And for folks who still haven’t seen it to this day in spite of its apparent cult status, Dante’s horror picture might be a little jarring. Tonally “Piranha” is unusual and quite surreal. The first half of the film is almost like a B dark comedy featuring drawn out bouts of exposition and a small stop motion bipedal fish walking around a secret lab for some inexplicable reason. The next half then suddenly becomes a stern straight faced horror film with the atmosphere amped up to eleven. It’s such an oddity on film that I couldn’t help but enjoy it from start to finish.
Fright Night (2011)
Don’t be fooled by the hullabaloo, “Fright Night” 2011 is a mess. And not just a mess but a pretty crummy remake of a movie that is deserving of its classic status. As a remake it switches elements up plot wise and distorts much of the themes of the original film’s narrative, but at the end of the day it’s all just so horribly put together that it’s all just so poorly conceived and eventually becomes incredibly monotonous. Like most modern remakes of classic horror films, this completely misses the point of the original film. But then that’s the point, many will argue. The point of the film is that it misses the point of the original film.
Subspecies (1991) [Blu-Ray]
Maybe I just wasn’t paying attention but what is the Bloodstone supposed to do, anyway? The entire first film of “Subspecies” revolves around the sacred macguffin called the Bloodstone. Allegedly it’s supposed to drip the blood of the saints but then what? Does that grant the vampire god-like abilities? Isn’t that a bit redundant considering a vampire is already near invincible? Does it allow them to walk during the day? Does it make them holy or something? I could never quite figure out what if anything the bloodstone was for. “Subspecies” in spite of its inherent narrative faults and logic gaps is a time when Full Moon was trying to deliver us quality entertainment.
Ghoul (2012)
I think at the end of the day the reason people will dislike “Ghoul” are for the reasons I really liked it. “Ghoul” isn’t so much a horror movie about an actual ghoul, but about the horrors of growing up in and around dysfunction. For many this film will be especially off putting since the whole notion of an actual ghoul is put in to the basic back burner in exchange for character focus and exposition galore. I for one am a sucker for coming of age tales, and “Ghoul” is an especially powerful one that focuses on three young boys in the middle of the eighties and their attempts to uncover a horrific secret their local forest is hiding.
Final Destination 5 (2011) (DVD/Blu-Ray/Digital)
It pains me that we have to sit through the “Final Destination” films when it can be developed in to something with a rich mythos and an overreaching story arc that ties together various characters. Instead it trots out one death after the other and insultingly introduces a new plot element that is not only ridiculous but until now was never mentioned in a movie. Again “Final Destination” sets up a series of questions and never answers them. So I’m left asking why. And with no successful answers. Because the producers behind “Final Destination” don’t feel the need to turn this series in to a semi-intelligent franchise, they just want this to be the films with the outstanding deaths.