Kiddy Kiddy Bang Bang (2012)

Dick Jane’s short film is obviously just a prologue to further adventures of its two heroines. It’s either going to be the first in a series of short films, or “Kiddy Kiddy Bang Bang” is a pitch for a feature film in the making. If Dick Jane gets it off the ground, I can imagine Troma being more than willing to scoop this up and make this in to a cult classic. As a short film it’s exploitative, ridiculous, far-fetched, and the entire story just makes no damn sense. I also snickered at the dedication to sexual abuse victims in the final scene.

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I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (1998)

27001Jeffery Combs, John Hawkes, a dreadlocked Jack Black with a heavy inexplicable Jamaican accent, you’d be pretty stupid not to watch this at least once in your lifetime. “I Still Know” this times seems to embrace the inherent stupidity of the film’s premise and completely wraps itself around the film’s utter moronic plot elements and red herrings at every turn. Replacing the bland Sarah Michelle Gellar is the even blander hip hop star Brandy, who is protagonist Julie’s on again, off again best friend and roommate Karla. Julie is back (apparently that final scene in the first film was a dream or something) and now in college. She has a nasty habit of waking up screaming in class, thanks to her recurring nightmares of the evil sailor man so obviously not a lot of people in her school want to be around her.

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Wrath of the Titans (2012) [Blu-Ray/DVD/Digital Copy]

I’m surprised to admit that, for the most part, “Wrath of the Titans” is a rather entertaining and exciting follow-up to “Clash of the Titans.” In fact, it’s every bit as superior to the awful remake as possible, and often times manages to surpass the first film in the realm of storytelling and characterization. Granted, the film is not without its list of faults. The dialogue is anachronistic, and Perseus’s relationship with Andromeda and his beloved son is painfully under developed and trite, but “Wrath of the Titans” fixes most of the problems with the first film and forges a path for a respectable trilogy. I’m not going to rush out to purchase the “Titans” trilogy set when it’s unleashed years from now, but I’m not above re-watching these films again to see where it continues to improve.

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Cherry Bomb (2011) [Blu-Ray]

cherry-bomb-blueray-wellgouIf there’s one chief complaint I have for “Cherry Bomb” is that the performances from the entire cast leave much to be desired. Every single cast member can never seem to decide if they want to play this material over the top like a grindhouse film or with dramatic intensity. The most jarring caveat is from star Julin who can also never seem to decide if she wants to play Cherry Bomb as a ditzy psychopath, or a dignified warrior woman. Sometimes Cherry can barely shoot a sniper rifle, and then other times she’s engaging in hand to hand combat with a master assassin and setting off clever booby traps.

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Batman: Ashes to Ashes (2009)

1243708565_ashes-to-ashesI guess this can be considered a fan film worth watching. Only if you’re willing to endure what it has to offer in the way of pathos and cruelty. “Batman: Ashes to Ashes” pretty much re-thinks the mythos of Batman while knocking off classic movies in the process. Directors Samuel Bodin and Julien Mokrani take from “A Clockwork Orange,” “Batman Returns,” and heavily relies on imagery reminiscent of “Sin City” to get its story moving, while characters like Harley Quinn are turned in to femme fatales with major villains playing only small parts.

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Dirty Laundry (2012)

I love 2004’s iteration of “The Punisher” starring Thomas Jane as Frank Castle also known as The Punisher. It’s a slow boiled crime thriller that eventually transforms in to a chaotic bloodbath with seemingly no limits on its cruelty. And it also has an admirable demented sense of humor. After 2004’s film, Thomas Jane dropped out of the role after a brouhaha with the studios and their direction toward the sequel that was apparently so bad and or radical that Jane just couldn’t abide by it. But since then many fans have argued that Thomas Jane’s performance of Frank Castle is the definitive cinematic performance of the character and his turn as Castle was admirable. It was layered, tragic, searing, bold, and genuine.

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Spawn (1997)

spawn-1997

I just never saw the hype behind Spawn when I was a kid in the nineties. While everyone sang the praises of Todd McFarlane, and everyone I knew ate up the Spawn comics with a shit eating grin, convinced Spawn was the second coming of comicdom, I just could never understand the big deal. Throughout the decade of the nineties I’d be like that guy in the museum who’d have to take four steps back to try to understand a painting and then just shrug in confusion and move on to something else. That was me with Spawn. Everyone I knew loved it, I’d take four steps back time and time again to re-evaluate if I was missing something key to it, shrug and move on to something else. Even with the meticulous collectible action figures being released for collectors, and the spin-offs of the comic being doled out for fans, I just could never quite grasp why this title in particular struck a chord.

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