I’m always of the opinion that there really isn’t anything new that we can do with classic fairytales, anymore. We can twist them, and reboot them, but in the end they’re really not going to feel fresh or inventive. It’s like that episode of “The Simpsons” where Marge couldn’t afford a new dress for her country club meetings, so she just kept re-designing the same dress over and over. “Jack the Giant Slayer” is exactly like that. Sure, it posits the idea that we’re being given a new tale, but in reality it’s just another take on Jack and the Beanstalk. But this ain’t yo daddy’s Jack and the Beanstalk! No sir! This is the true story of Jack and the Giants before the actual tale was invented.
Tag Archives: War
Hold Your Fire (2008)
Director Wes Bencoster’s short horror film is a master stroke of a commentary on war and the inherent futility of the Vietnam war. Much like a horror film, “Hold Your Fire” begins with a gas masked soldier in a dusty land rooting through a landfill, and watches as a figure slowly creeps up on him. He fires shooting the figure in the head, and walks over to investigate the corpse. “Hold Your Fire” is based heavily on metaphor and symbolism paired with a thick irony that never spares a single second in displaying a world still affected by the Vietnam war, and how it still affects so many.
In the Army Now (1994)
Pauly Shore?! In the Army?! But–what wackiness will ensue from this mash up? The nineties were a time where Hollywood attempted to thrust Pauly Shore on American audiences. And it seemed for a while that Shore was well on his way to becoming a comedy icon. That is, until America caught on quicker than he could establish himself. It was a case of “He’s kind of funny… wait, no he’s not!” Hell even I kind of liked him for a while. It’s a pretty sad commentary on the decade, when the comedy rebel we’re given is Pauly Shore of all people.
Rolling Thunder (1977) [Blu-Ray]
It’s pretty funny that Tommy Lee Jones and William Devane who star in “Rolling Thunder” do their best to prevent talking about the elephant in the room for the extras in the “Rolling Thunder” Blu-Ray from Shout! Factory. “Rolling Thunder” is one in a line of post-Vietnam films about the defeat of the war and its effects on its veterans. “Rolling Thunder” is a bleak revenge film about a soldier that went to war for nothing, only to come home to nothing. DeVane gives a compelling performance as Major Charles Rane, a man who was imprisoned in a POW camp for seven years with a few other soldiers. Finally freed, he and the group return home to Texas to receive a grand welcome, but they’re unsure how to respond. They’ve lived like savages for almost a decade, and, as Rane admits, he gained something of a Stockholm effect. Not just for his captors, but for the torture inflicted on him and his men every single day.
Exit Humanity (2011)
I wanted to love “Exit Humanity,” but in the end I feel like there were just too many ideas for one film. “Exit Humanity” attempts to take a simply a period piece zombie movie and turn it in to a high concept art house film. So there’s narration (by the great Brian Cox), there’s an alleged journal chronicling the rise of the dead, there are animated wipes that progress to the next scene, there are animated sequences where our hero fights the walking dead, and there are an endless stream of flashbacks and nightmare sequences allegedly symbolizing the carnage of the situation at hand.
Bloodrayne: The Third Reich (2010)
What is Uwe Boll’s obsession with the holocaust? First he sets this new “Bloodrayne” snore fest in the holocaust and has the gall to try for his own Holocaust documentary. This from the man who created “Blubberella.” In any consolation Natassia Malthe is still very sexy as Rayne and has the same charisma as the former Rayne Kristanna Loken, never missing a beat. Rayne still looks like a hardcore cosplayer lost in a time warp, though. So in the midst of soldiers and World War II, she looks incredibly out of place. Where does she get all of that leather?
Red Dawn (1984)
Director John Milius’s 1984 war action film “Red Dawn” is probably one of the best guilty pleasures the eighties ever doled out for audiences. It’s certainly one of my childhood favorites, a film I recall re-watching time and time again and cheering on the likes of Charlie Sheen and Patrick Swayze. The film as a whole is absurd and incredibly silly, with everything in the film being drawn as inexplicably convenient for the good guys, and incredibly bad for the bad guys. Trained mercenaries can’t possibly outwit and outgun a bunch of high school students whose only training is hunting in the woods? Seriously?