Friday the 13th: Jason vs. Jason X

My original thought was how the hell they’d explain Jason Voorhees fighting uber-Jason from Jason X. And the writers do a piss poor job of it. Maybe there are two realities in the future in where the space scavengers form a time rift? Who knows? What we learn is that Uber-Jason is not really Jason, but the head of Jason with a body compiled of nanobots, and robotic parts. He is kind of a pseudo-Jason, to be exact.

We learn in the two part mini-series that he’s convinced he’s Jason and is trying to re-claim the psyche of the original Jason to complete his memory and continue his mission to murder everyone and anyone who steps foot in Camp Crystal Lake. So Jason belonged to Earth Prime, which is now a wasteland, and the space crew from “Jason X” froze and destroyed Jason from Earth 2. That Jason was re-invented as a science fiction monster known as Uber-Jason. They then went to Earth Prime to capture Jason again, and learn from his regenerative tissues. That failed. Duh.

And now Jason is thawed and lurking on the abandoned ship. We now have two Jasons. So does that mean we have two Freddy Kruegers and two Pinheads and two Leprechauns? In either case, taking off from the “Jason X” special, the characters from Earth Prime that survive their confrontation with Jason end up on the party ship where Uber-Jason is, and as one female pilot attempts to flee, she ends up caught in between the battle of Jason and Uber-Jason for complete dominance.

As with the usual slasher fare, there are no characters we can root for, but this comic takes it to a whole other level. There are literally no interesting heroes or heroines here, and it’s mainly just pages of slaughtering hapless victims. The fight between uber-Jason and Jason also doesn’t warrant much sense, especially considering the Jason the writers chose to go with, in the end. Uber-Jason kills Jason, and puts his brain in to his own head to garner the crown of Jason Prime. So then what? Is Uber-Jason the primary design now? It’s all so unsatisfying, in the end.

Jason X Special [Avatar Press]

When Uber-Jason crash landed in to Earth in the end of “Jason X,” it turned out to be another virtual reality. In an effort to grab a part of his regenerative tissue to learn about his healing properties, a young scientist is able to snare and trap him. Since that doesn’t last long, things get worse when Uber-Jason’s psyche re-invents the memories of his mother as a computer system who begins controlling Jason’s thoughts and commands.

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Afterlife with Archie #1

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Spawned from a mock variant cover last year, “Afterlife with Archie” is another of the many unique attempts by Archie Comics to re-claim their relevance. After wisely acknowledging that there are such things as gay people in their universe, Archie is now embracing the horror genre. Thankfully, this crossover isn’t disastrous like their crossover with The Punisher. This is more demented with a hint of genius like “Marvel Zombies.” I don’t know how long this series can go before it gets boring, but so far I’m loving the dark nature of the Archie Universe.

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My Top Ten X-Men Characters Of All Time

X-Men1This year marks the 50th anniversaries of the X-Men and The Avengers. So to commemorate my love for the X-Men, I thought it’d be fun to count down my top ten X-Men of all time. I really don’t care who is dead currently, or who are evil, or who is on a new team. This is my top ten X-Men and the characters that keep me coming back to this intelligent and wonderful franchise throughout the late eighties and the nineties.

Who are some of your favorites?

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Our 5 Most Hated Superhero Costume Changes

Electro-SupermanIn the late eighties, all of the nineties, and some of the early aughts, comic books were our number one hobby. We collected literally every comic that drew our interest. Over the years, especially in the nineties, many of the major comic book companies attempted to draw in new readers by changing the costumes of some of their major superheroes and super villains. If that wasn’t bad enough, for a very long time, many of the live action efforts for superhero movies often got the superhero costumes so painfully wrong, that it was almost tough to admit to anyone that you were a fan of comic books. Over the years, superheroes have undergone a lot of major changes to their costumes in many platforms, and these are five of the worst that we just can’t get over.

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Comic Bucket List #3: Danger Girl

“The Comic Bucket List” is a limited column where we review 25 comic books and graphic novels we’ve been meaning to read for years. We discover if they were worth waiting for, or if they never quite lived up to the hype they promised.

DANGER GIRL (FIRST RUN)
1998
J. Scott Campbell, Andy Hartnell

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Hey Marvel, How About Another Punisher Movie?

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We’ve reached that time again where we, the Punisher fans of old and new begin wondering what is happening with Frank Castle also known as The Punisher. Last year Marvel Studios bought back their properties including Daredevil and The Punisher and are now basically just sitting on them. And we’re wondering when we’re going to see another bonafide Punisher movie in theaters. Surely making revenge films isn’t that hard an endeavor since every studio has released their own revenge film over the years. But for some reason you’d think making a revenge film about a stone cold avenger with a skull on his black shirt is something that requires rocket science.

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