It’s almost as if mid-way the writers and producers decided that a horrible virus eliminating an entire small town in a disturbing fever wasn’t good enough. So they inject a crusty scowling military man who has been given orders to destroy the whole town. It’s so rote and typical of Hollywood that it’s jarring to the tone of “Outbreak.” Wolfgang Peterson’s ensemble thriller can never really decide if it wants to be an action adventure thriller or a dramatic thriller. It wants to feature explosions and epic helicopter chases, but it also tries to inject explorations in to military policy, government corruption, and discussion about past events in history that were rationalized as a means to an end.
The Zombie Combat Manual: A Guide to Fighting The Living Dead [Paperback]
Comparisons to “The Zombie Survival Guide” are only inevitable. Max Brooks’ “The Zombie Survival Guide” is perhaps the most detailed examination of what to do and how to act during the conventional zombie apocalypse. Not just that, it poses as a good hand book for tips on what to do during a natural disaster. Such as filling containers with water until help arrives, and guarding your own domicile until help arrives. If it ever arrives. Mostly though it’s about how to survive during the zombie apocalypse of the Romero variety. “The Zombie Combat Manual” completely sets itself apart by being primarily about zombie combat and nothing more. Anything about where to hide, how to hide, where to retreat and how to store food is left for the Brooks novel.
“The Zombie Combat Manual” is strictly for the violence buff who wants to know how to battle the walking dead and look like a bad ass doing so. There are explorations in to various weapons, how they hold up in combat, and how to implement them. The newest treat for the book that the Brooks hand guide didn’t address pretty much in detail is the stench of the walking dead. In “The Zombie Combat Manual,” writer Roger Ma addresses that one of the best weapons in a zombie’s defense is the smell. Often times people can forget how badly they smell and become disoriented, allowing the zombies to gain the upper hand. It’s a new Easter egg in the zombie battle tactics that I enjoyed reading about.
Waffle (2010)
This is one of the few times in my life where I’ve seen a waffle filmed on-screen and felt a twinge of disgust watching it. Director Rafael DeLeon equates the edible waffle desert with the character Wendy in his short film “Waffle,” and uses it as a symbolic way of revealing her apparent deformity that’s never quite revealed. The local high school alpha queen Dana indulges in a creepy dinner with local science genius and deformed high schooler Wendy and her mother.
Haunted High (2012)
Zombie frogs, demonic exercise machines, ghostly sports jerseys, and evil toilets, they’re all here to be about as moronic as possible in one of the least scary movies I’ve ever seen. RL Stine in his days of “Goosebumps” drew more chills from me than “Haunted High” a film so laughably bad, it’s almost impossible to watch in one sitting. It basically has everything a bad horror film should have. Special effects so bad they seem to have been created in the mid-eighties, a villain so non-threatening he barely registers above a yawn in the spook meter, and did I mention genre favorite Charisma Carpenter gets top billing for a role that’s literally only thirty seconds in length?
C.H.U.D. II – Bud the Chud (1989)
When I was a kid I was frightened of pretty much any movie that featured the walking dead, and surely enough my fright was induced whenever I watched “CHUD II.” I can fondly remember re-watching this movie on the now defunct “Monsters HD” cable channel in America three years ago and gazing in disbelief at this absurd and unfunny zombie movie. I was horrified of this? Seriously? “CHUD II” is a travesty not just because it’s an unfunny horror comedy, and not just because it’s not an actual sequel to “CHUD” at all. But because it’s a pretty blatant rip-off of “Return of the Living Dead” with brain eating intelligent zombies taking center stage, and even featuring a zombie dog who rolls with the group of zombies throughout the film.
The Amazing Spider-Man (2012)
While deep down Sony engineered a reboot of “Spider-Man” in an effort to secure the rights, “The Amazing Spider-Man” uses the opportunity to correct the mistakes made by previous franchise runner Sam Raimi. Where Raimi opted for camp and schlock with his installments, “The Amazing Spider-Man” launches a more dramatic approach. Where Raimi opted for the traditional Spider-Man, Marc Webb constructs a more radical re-thinking of the Spider-Man mythos. And unlike Raimi, director Marc Webb opts to side step the camp flavor as much as humanly possible. This reboot is much more true to the Spider-Man we all know and love, and thankfully it’s a superior film that promises to age better than Sam Raimi’s films.
Reel Evil (2012)
I’m yelling! I’m yelling very loudly and at the same time as everyone else thus creating the facade that there is conflict in a boring movie! I am angry for some reason! I am lost in a labyrinth of an abandoned insane asylum and am yelling louder for some reason! Watch me yell some more proving there is conflict where there is none! Loud noises! My temper is inexplicably short! It is very scary when people are lost in dark halls for almost eighty minutes only to hear the occasional whisper and no pay off!