This is about as low as sequels go. At least for third rate horror franchises. “Ghoulies” was never sure what the hell it ever wanted to be, and “Goes to College” shows. The third part in the series shows them as nothing more than annoying little monsters that wreak havoc by inflicting pain, though never really murdering anyone. In fact they’re really nothing but third wheels in what feels like a stale campus comedy about prank wars with the Ghoulies attached for a wider audience. Before the ghoulies actually pop out to terrorize people, “Ghoulies Goes to College” watches like a fourth rate “Revenge of the Nerds” wannabe, about two warring frats and their ever lasting prank war.
“Gotham” Season One, Episode One: Pilot Review
(Spoilers Abound)
“Gotham” can be really goofy; almost “Smallville” goofy. And it seems to be revising the Batman lore again for a new audience that may not be familiar with the Batman mythology. The first twenty minutes of the pilot are brutally cheesy with a lot of clunky exposition, plays on morality, corruption, and immense focus on how hard boiled Harvey Bullock and James Gordon are. They’re tough men that have seen the worst life can offer, and dagnabit, they’re at odds like Murtaugh and Riggs from “Lethal Weapon” when we first see them. Well really they’re kind of an after thought. The focus of the first five minutes of the premiere is on a prepubescent street thief who walks Gotham, stealing to survive, and galloping along fire escapes. Almost like a cat of some kind. Get it, yet?
Marvel Knights Animation Presents: Eternals (DVD)
It’s mind blowing how mind numbing “Eternals” is. The really bad John Romita Jr. art matched with the convoluted dull story make this animated comic a task to sit through. Granted, I love the idea of normal human beings actually being engineered superheroes and completely oblivious to their powers. There’s also a moment where a party is besieged by terrorists and character Mark Curry discovers his ability to slow down time, thus allowing him to stop the bullets, and steal the guns, but has to find a way to take the bullets without burning himself or blowing them up in the air. It’s a nice sense of logic to fantasy.
Marvel Knights Animation Presents Eternals (DVD)
It’s mind blowing how mind numbing “Eternals” is. The really bad John Romita Jr. art matched with the convoluted dull story make this animated comic a task to sit through. Granted, I love the idea of normal human beings actually being engineered superheroes and completely oblivious to their powers. There’s also a moment where a party is besieged by terrorists and character Mark Curry discovers his ability to slow down time, thus allowing him to stop the bullets, and steal the guns, but has to find a way to take the bullets without burning himself or blowing them up in the air. It’s a nice sense of logic to fantasy.
The PC Thug: I Don’t Miss “Friends”
I love nostalgia. I love to celebrate nostalgia, and I love re-living the nineties when I’m bored or blue. But I certainly do have my limits when it comes to nostalgia and selling me nostalgia. There’s a big difference between celebrating the nineties and buying any crap that’s kind of from the nineties. I thought slap bracelets were cool, but I’m not going to spend ten dollars for one on Ebay. And yes, at one time I watched and enjoyed “Friends,” but it’s by no means the one of the best TV series of all time. Surely, it lasted ten seasons, but does that mean it should be celebrated? Am I the only one who remembers those last three awful seasons of the series where the writers were just making shit up and bringing on any guest stars? Does no one else remember “Joey”?
Congo (1995)
I’ll just come out and say it. I’m one of the five people in the world that really enjoys “Congo.” I don’t care how smug it makes me sound, but I’m genuinely shocked that it’s so reviled by many movie fans since I never thought it was terrible. I won’t lie, for years I’ve always thought of “Congo” as nothing more than a B grade adventure film about maniacal monkeys and diamonds, but I’m shocked it’s so trashed by a majority of movie buffs and critics alike. I think there are much worse movies out there. Sure, there’s a monkey drinking a martini, but come on, is “Congo” really awful? I don’t think so.
Dallas Buyers Club (2013)
What’s most striking about director Jean-Marc Vallée’s “Dallas Buyer’s Club” is the way AIDS is depicted. From the moment Ron Woodroff is told he has terminal AIDS and thirty days left to wrap up his affairs, his life is literally running down on a timer, and he’s literally scrambling back and forth for a way to preserve it. And what begins as a means of self-preservation transforms in to a very eye opening exploration of the world and how AIDS is a very unbiased disease that isn’t restricted to the homosexual community that it’s been used to demonize for many years.