Today on BAD MOVIE MONDAY, Santa Jeremy is going to review one of the most dreaded of all Christmas films. SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT 3: BETTER WATCH OUT! So put on the socks your grandma gave you and hold on tight! This may be a rough ride. Ho-Ho-Ho!!!
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Robert Lieberman’s dose of mean spirited brutally disgusting torture porn entitled “The Tortured” is a lot like “Hard Candy” except dunderheaded, half-witted, and a pure right wing cartoon. Two young good looking parents in an upper class neighborhood are angry that the police aren’t doing enough to find their son who was kidnapped before husband Craig’s very eyes in their back yard one day. Wife Elise of course barely blames her husband, except blames the authorities. We learn all of this information in only the first five minutes of the film that speeds through the kidnapping, the investigation, Elise’s anguish at the kidnapping, and we even visit the hilariously cartoonish Koslowski, a pedophile hillbilly too ridiculous to be horrified of.
It’s hard to believe that a film I had considerable trouble sitting through without covering my eyes was directed by Corbin Bernsen of all people. This is the man who takes pride in starring in some of the worst horror movies ever made, and here he’s directed a film that has outweighed its double “Pontypool” in every aspect. While many were out celebrating the existence of the indie horror film about a radio DJ experiencing the end of the world through the radio, I sat waiting for something better from this concept and wouldn’t you know it? Here comes “Dead Air,” a movie that possesses basically the same concept and story and pulls off much more suspense and tension than “Pontypool” actually does.