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Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992)

ttt_buffy-560x300Yes, it’s not the vision that Joss Whedon had originally planned, but you know what? “Buffy” was just too ahead of its time and eventually found its place with the cult favorite series. But that’s not to say that the original 1992 movie isn’t any fun, either. Taken as a stand alone horror comedy, “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” actually manages to be a creepy, twisted, and very funny take on the vampire slayer mold, teaming an ass kicking valley girl against vampires. And Kristy Swanson is a better Buffy than Sarah Michelle Gellar. Teeming with 90’s paraphernalia, “Buffy” is dated, but definitely one of the better attempts at mixing vampires with comedy.

Surely enough it’s also a good gateway drug for anyone that wants to delve in to the horror genre without bathing in unnecessary gore, and heavy sexual themes. This variation of “Buffy” is “Clueless” meets “Lost Boys,” with Kristy Swanson playing the titular Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Cursed with visions and dreams of a past life involving a young girl seduced and eventually murdered by a vampire, Buffy slowly realizes her world is changing around her. Especially considering that the pains she’s experiencing are being accompanied by her sudden heightened strength, agility, endurance, and advanced senses. Buffy just wants to be a normal shallow valley girl whose world revolves around school dances and boys, but she eventually meets Merrick.

As played by Donald Sutherland, he proclaims she is one in a long line of vampire slayers, and is destined to guide her in her battle against the forces of darkness and the supernatural by acting as her “watcher.” Meanwhile, the immortal vampire Lothos has risen and begins feasting on local high schoolers, while Buffy realizes she has to train and eventually face off against the dreaded vampire master and his minions. “Buffy” has its share of problems, especially considering the fact that the entire grand plot of Lothos seems hellbent on eating Buffy and nothing more. All the while the face off and eventual death of the villainous vampire is abrupt and unsatisfying. I was also never sure how anyone would explain the vampires, but director Fran Rubel Kuzui approaches the material with absurdity so it’s a footnote that’s glossed over.

In either case, “Buffy” still entertains greatly, thanks to its hilarious script and slew of top notch performances. Luke Perry is fun as Buffy’s ally Oliver, while Kristy Swanson kills it as the sexy, smart alecky, and tough as nails Buffy. There’s also Donald Sutherland who is fun as Merrick, while Paul Ruebens is laugh out loud hilarious as Lothos’ second in command vampire Amilyn. He plays the role like Evil from “Fright Night” if he ever grew in to the role of blood sucker. While it’s been noted much of the dialogue is improvised, Reubens has fun the role, while also playing the resident punching bag. I still cackle at many of the one-liners, as well as Amilyn’s refusal to die after being staked. I also really find the martial arts throwdown between Buffy and the vampire minions in the fog pretty damn sleek. “Buffy” serves more as a fun guilty pleasure, but one that chooses to embrace the absurdity and run with it, as opposed to Whedon’s series that embraced the irony and wit.

Once Bitten (1985)

oncebittenIt’s often completely ignored or dismissed in the annals of Jim Carrey’s film career, but “Once Bitten” is one of my favorite of the Carrey comedy works. It’s not a masterpiece by any means, but it’s one of Carrey’s most restrained roles, where he’s funny without being over the top or rubbery as he was in his more successful films. “Once Bitten” is that eighties guilty pleasure I go back to again and again for a good chuckle. And to ponder the idea of being seduced by a vampiric Lauren Hutton. Either way, it’s all good.

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Life After Beth (2014)

Director Jeff Baena’s zombie romance comedy is one part “Death Dream,” one part “Zombie Honeymoon,” and two part indie romance. It’s an eerie and gross allegory about breaking up, and being able to let go, no matter how horrifying it is. Though “Life After Beth” is grating at times with a self awareness that can be on the nose sometimes, Baen definitely captures the spirit of a tragic romance, and a brutal zombie film in a disgusting hybrid. Dane DeHaan plays Zach, a lovelorn young man whose girlfriend Beth dies after being bitten by a snake while taking a hike. After mourning, and displaying an unusual bond with Beth’s parents, Zach discovers by accident that Beth is actually alive.

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Young Frankenstein (1974): 40th Anniversary Edition [Blu-Ray]

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It’s tough to imagine a better horror comedy for fans of golden age horror. Director Mel Brooks concocts a formula that’s almost impossible to duplicate, playing brilliant comedy with deadpan dramatic sincerity, and implements a wide cast of amazing comedy actors to perform what is a demented twist on “Mary Shelly’s Frankenstein.” One of my favorite memories about “Young Frankenstein” was when I was a kid and my mom brought home the VHS to watch for the night. For all intents and purposes, the movie looked like a horror film, and I went in to it convinced of the idea. Mid-way I was laughing so hard, it was impossible to hear the dialogue.

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Garfield’s Halloween Adventure (1985)

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There’s nothing funnier than watching Garfield and Odie prepare for a holiday. There’s something about the holidays that helps Garfield set aside his dislike for the dog, and turns him in to a friend. This time it’s for the sake of a large grab of candy for Halloween, as he figures out he could get more of it if he brings Odie along. I knew I liked Garfield for a reason, because just like me, his favorite holiday is Halloween. No trees, no relatives, just candy. That’s how it’s done.

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Mosquito (1995)

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“You’re living science fact!”

An alien ship crash lands in a swamp in the wilderness. But that’s unimportant–giant mosquitoes! What about the aliens, you say? Who cares? Giant Mosquitoes! It’s too bad we never saw what happened when humans drank alien blood. Do they too become gigantic? I think we deserve an answer. Director Gary Jones’ “Mosquito” is pure mid-nineties STV junk, but damn is it a good time. If you’re going to name a movie “Mosquito” (and it’s not a metaphor) you’d better serve us some giant mosquitoes, and director Jones supplies the goods.

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Sexcula (1974) (DVD)

sexcula“Sexcula” is like one big acid trip. There’s no sense of narrative, tone, pacing, or any kind of semblance of story. The director doesn’t even seem to be working on any kind of script. Take for example the big show where a stripper (glimmering in a spotlight seemingly appearing from nowhere) begins dancing with the castle owner’s pet gorilla. The gorilla is so enticed by the dancing, he attacks and rapes the stripper, and out of revenge, she rapes the gorilla. The two then seemingly die during the revenge rape, and then they pop up taking a bow as the characters in the film applaud. It’s this kind of nonsense that makes “Sexcula” irritating, but oddly alluring. I’d call it erotic and sexy, but the movie is just too stupid to muster up any kind of that flavor.

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